I've got a problem, for the past 6 months i've noticed a change in me. I've always been excited by women but lately when i look at guys or good looking ones i find myself not being turned on but find it hard to concentrate and for soem strange reason increase saliva output. I know it's crazy but it happens. I am confused, i tried looking at porn and to watch the guys to see if i get turned on but i don't and in fact the sight of a naked guy going at it sickens me. Am i going crazy or am i gay or closet? Geez..what is wrong with me?!

Sounds to me as if you are a bit bisexual. Some people are attracted to both men and women, but just visually and have no interest in actually having a relationship with both sexes.

If you are this sort of bisexual - who just has a little bit of homosexuality or heterosexuality in you - your brain finds the same sex attractive just not much. You might be curious enough to try sex with someone of the same sex a few times and just find it doesn't do much for you.

On the otherhand, if you come from a family that was very anti- gay or a community or religion that is very anti-gay, you might have suppressed your feelings about men and just aren't allowing yourself to feel OK about your feelings. In this case you might still be bisexual. If you have had successful relationships with women you could be bisexual.

In either event this is absolutely nothing to worry about. More men than you can possibly imagine have the kind of feeling you describe.

Now on the otherhand, if you find you simply do no have successful sexual relationship with women, you might want to try to figure out why. Is it possible that your are denying your feelings about men and just being a straight guy because being a straight guy is what is expected in this society?

A few hard questions to consider. Just try to think of gay feelings as completely natural and something you have absolutely no control over. Write again if you need more help with this.

Susan

hi, I partly know what you mean. I say 'partly' because I'm still very much interested in women. My g/f and I have had a few sexual experiences with other couples and during this I found out I actually had sexual feelings for the males as well. For starters, it's impossible not to touch eachother if you're playing with 4 people. Later I also had the experience of giving the guy a blow job. This did turn me on, but not as much as the women did.
I feel these feelings are nothing to worry about, but I guess it's a different ball game if you actually want to do something with these feelings. I think there are 2 kinds of bi-sexuality: one where you can actually can fall in love with both sexes and one where you only have sexual feelings for both sexes. I feel I experience the second one. I also think there are a lot of men out there who have the same. But it's such a taboo that it's hard to admit it and/or to talk about it with friends. The internet is a great way of meeting people that you can talk with about this.
Good luck.

Thanks Tim- you are right - there are two types of sexuality ( bi, hetero or homo) - simple attraction with no desire to act on it- and a desire to actually have sex - be in a relationship - fall in love.