I think Im frigid, Im 30 haven't had an orgasim in 9 yrs, never from vaginal sex. Although I have

sex frequently because I enjoy the act, the Idea of it, I have 2 kids, want to please my

partner, and hope that one day I will be able to somewhat enjoy vaginal sex without getting a

cramp in my hand.

I know for a fact that I have low libido, I dont get horny, Nor was I ever a horny teenager,

like people say what teenagers go through, with all the hormones, I didnt experience that.

I get no sensation from vaginal sex, unless Im being stimulated at the same time, I still really

dont feel any sexual vaginal sensation at that tme either. No heavy breathing, all over body

tingling. Nada

I can only be stimulated by touching the

clitoris itself, which is too sensitive. So I have to stop. So I have not had an orgaism in 9 yrs

I am not sensitive to touch anywhere else around the

vagina area. And when Im not stimulated I loose female engorgement immediatly.

I feel like a freak- I tell people but many have never heard of this.

I think Im frigid or I have Female Sexual Dysfunction Syndrome

We have tried vibrators, lubricants, that hot stuff- no vaginal sensation

Is there any help out there.

Ann,

Lets start with your vagina - lots of women have no sensation from vaginal intercourse - so there is nothing at all odd about that. In fact that makes you absolutely normal.

An lots of women only feel sensation through their clitoris. So that too is normal.

What isn't normal is the sensation on your clitoris is more than you can stand. So I have a few suggestions for you to try.....

First have you used lubrication on your clitoris? And has that lubrication been a good quality lubrication? Bad lubrication is worse than no lubrication. One of the worst ones in my opinion is the one most advertised - KY. It gets sticky and thick and causes friction and then soreness. I use Eros silicon lubrication because it slides really well and never dries out. It is expensive, but you need just a little and you don't have to keep putting it on over and over. I sell it on my web page because I like it so much.  There is a female formula and a waterbased formula, but I suggest the silcone formula - especially for you.

Second, you can get a desensitizing gel. It is mostly sold to men who ejaculate too quickly. It is basically like putting oralgel on your clitoris - except it doesn't have all the sugar in it so it won't get thick and sticky.

Third, do you take any medications at all? Things prescribed by a doctor, or things you buy at a store or through an herbalist. Sometime innocent things cause problems with sensation.

Fourth, have you ever discussed this with your gynecologist?

Let me know if any of this helps at all- and if not I] have a few more suggestions. But these are my first choices.

Susan

I tried KY jelly and it is pretty good. You just have to spit on it a little.

 

Clay..the whole point of buying lubrication is that you don't need to spit on it. It defeats the whole purpose. Susan 

Thank you, for your response. Im not taking any medications, I also thought about using desensitizing gel, but I figured it would just make it worse, because I cant feel anything down there already. I only talked to a gynecologist nurse about it years ago before I started self stimulation, which she told me to try. I believe she thought I was just whinning about not having an orgasim.

I told my mother about the problem, an that I heard of people having no feeling down there, she told me that she had never heard of that, and that it was weird.

So Im thinking dont people really get hot and horny for each other, have lustful sex like on tv where they really want each other an tear each others clothes off and have great sex, without having to be trying to sexually stimulate each through out the whole process.

Or is that all a big fantasy?

Ann,

It is not all a big lie, but it is also not always true.  One thing to realize is most women do not reach their sexual peak until they are your age or older.

If your clitoris is too senstive - just put the desensitizing cream on your clitoris and no where else. If you use it very sparingly it will not make anything else numb.

There are medical conditions that cause a lack of sensation - so if none of the ideas I gave you work - you really should talk to a gynecologist. It could be you have very low testosterone levels  ( both men & women have testoterone and testosterone is one of the things that makes you horny---and is not needed except in a very small quantity for pregnancy) and could make a difference if you took testosterone supplements.

Are you on birth control pills??

Susan

 

 

No, Im not on birth control pills I dont like the way they make me feel emotionally. Because they make feel like Im pregnant.

Ann,

That is a clue - that birth control pills make you feel pregnant. That suggests that you might have a hormonal inbalance of some kind (testoterone is a hormone). You need to ask your doctor to do a blood test that checks your hormone levels to see if you have any that are too high or too low.

Susan

Thank you, I figured that I might have some kind of imbalance for a while, but I never really

looked into it, because I thought that was a normal effect from birth control pills.

You have been very helpful- Im going to make a appointment.

Ann,

Terrific - let me know what you find out. I wil be curious.

Susan