Greetings, Susan^^
I have been with my boyfriend for 11 months now, after 4 months we first had sex. At first it didn't work because it hurt too much, but as we tried more often it hurt less and less, but it just never went away! Always when it begins I really have to adjust to having that thing in me and it hurts like hell, but after a minute it becomes less and less until it goes away completely and then it's just uncomfortable, why won't it go away??

It is hard to say, but my guess it is partly an attitude problem about "that thing" and partly an inexperience problem.

On occassion it hurts me when I first have sex, and this has been because me and my partner have been in a hurry and didn't take enough time, forgot the lube, or I was distracted. This feeling passes in about 10 seconds.

If it seems as if it is going to last longer, I say "hey we need lube" or focus on the sex or just say "this is hurting for some reason, we got to stop" and then we do something else for awhile.

So first - are you in a place where you feel comfortable? Are you NOT worried about parents coming in or people overhearing or not having enough time?

Second, are you taking your time? YOU need atleast 20 minutes of foreplay and probably more before you are ready to be penetrated by a penis. You should feel your heart beating rapidly, be breathing heavily - BEFORE you start.

Third, use lubrication. Lots of it. He should have some on his penis over the condom and one of you should put some on your fingers and slide them inside you so you are lubricated inside.

Fourth, you need to think about positions. Is there a position that hurts more than others? Less? Talk to him about what feels good and what doesn't feel good. You have to tell each other what you want as neither of you are mind readers.

IF you are doing all that now, and it hurts then you need to go see a doctor. Sex isn't supposed to hurt. When it hurts (except for the first few times) it means something is not being done well or there is something wrong with you. If you are just uncomfortable, my best guess is you are not doing something I wrote about above.

Susan