Dave is so retarded looking that mental wards call in for back up. Les is so ugly that lions, tigers, and bears back down from his face. He is so ugly that moon beams turn up to space when he enters the night. They both are so ugly and old looking that when they pass rest homes old weman say "And i thought i had bad skin". Dave and les are so ugly that when they get together, civilizations of foreigners move away. They both are so ugly that the forensics team would need bottles of Pepto and shades in order to fiqure out what genetically went wrong. They are both so ugly that scientists say " It's mind boggling!"Les is so ugly that police say " Oh no! not this mug shot". Dave is so ugly that cows and sheep migrate away when he arrives. They are so ugly that plants die and planets orbit a few miles higher in the solar system. Space aliens say "We dare not to capture the likes of these horrible looking earth creaturez!"