Hey Everyone,
Quick update...
I did collect many important documents.
I have still been emotionally shut out, and there are still things happening that can only be taken as emotionally hurtful.
I believe I am only staying at this point until I am convinced which way she is going as regards dealing with her BPD or not.
Then I will have to wait to see what type of progress she makes. One thing in our favor is that she does not have as serious a case as could be possible.
I just found out tonight (from her) that we received an invitation by neighbors to a party on Saturday afternoon. She supposedly forgot to tell me about it till tonight (just late enough to probably not find a babysitter) ... She also, coincidentally was not sure she wanted to be there with me!!!! THis eff'ing hurt, and pissed me off. If she had approached me and we discussed it together, I MIGHT not be as hurt. But she did this, as usual, without considering me or my feelings.
I told her tonight that I am staying because I don't want us to lose for STUPID B___S___ reasons, or for something that we could deal with together (like her BPD). But I also told her that I am not sure right now how much SH__ I believe I should eat on the way while trying to keep my family together. All said with a straight delivery- not yelling.
Sick or not, I right now feel like she is being a stupid a__ for throwing away a serious family, and blowing the lives of THREE people for some stupid BS that she has chosen to focus on and ignoring all the big important things that she has that are great.
I am trying very hard not to let me ego make decisions for me... Which would be to tell her the hell off for disrespecting and not appreciating me. I also don't want to do anything out of some sense of relief, which may only be temporary and impulsive.
But I have been quite good at setting and enforcing my new limits. That has felt empowering, and helps me feel more centered than any similar time in the past, and this time I am married with a child (so there is a lot more at stake!!)
That is all I can think of right now. I do not know what is going to happen. I can't believe she pulled all this before the Christmas!!
Bernie
IT'S ME, BERNIE! 
