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TO : kkZZRyKKK Klingon gunnery officer URGENT!

March 20 2003 at 8:20 PM
WOTTA LOTTA ROT 
from IP address 203.220.108.70

Your phasers have been repaied, testing has been completed, and their performance is exceptionally good.

Unfortunately, on the test firing the phaser beam inadvertently struck (and totally destroyed) one of the moons of our home planet ( the one named Ezentra.... remember it?) and then bounced to the newly constructed flagship of the Klingon fleet.... which was also totally destroyed. ( before it was even named and launched!)


As the person who authorised the test firing, I am being held under house arrest while our beloved Emperor ( may all his fleas be tranqulised) considers whether I should be commended for markmanship, or simply executed.

 
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kkZZRyKKK Klingon gunnery officer

203.220.111.78

To WOTTA LOTTA ROT

March 21 2003, 7:42 PM 

So you think you've got roubles ?
I've got to deal with a Commando level Sushi-Origami dog, who might soon have the SS Incredibable repainted to serve as camouflage for him!

Tough luck that the phasers destroyed a moon back at home planet, and a flagship too ! ( Was anyone hurt?)

but ... WHEN WILL I GET MY #$%#$%# PHASERS ?

 
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Staff Officer Paypper Waysster

195.93.65.8

About your phasers

March 24 2003, 3:40 AM 

You have failed to provide three (3) of the necessary twenty seven (27) forms to get your phasers back.
(see top secret attachment to this message.)
Such sloppy ways in documentation will never win a war, especially against those devious Earthlings.
To get rid of that dangerous dog Casey, just beam him a bone poisoned with BLOW-UP-FLUID onto his background, or whiteground, or blackground, or what ??


Att. Documents §üöä to §ßü# (top secret !!)



 
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kkZZRyKKK Klingon gunnery officer

203.220.110.165

YOU PIMPLE-HEADED BEAROC.. BOORO.... WELL, Y'KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

March 24 2003, 9:26 PM 

Has it occurred to ANYBODY in yor quiet little office that we have a war going on ..... AND THAT I'M FORCED TO DO MY FIGHTING WITH A WATER PISTOL ?


Iwant my phasers back!
GIMME MY PHASERS!
GIMME MY PHASERS!

 
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Pratttle W. Twatttle, Klingon Press Officer

195.93.65.8

This is an order !

March 24 2003, 9:55 PM 

Will you stop immediately broadcasting your complaints on open channels !!!!
Headquarters is well aware of your problems and is doing everything to solve them SASPO

 
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