Happy Halloween!
Randy, deepest respect for you, still supporting the site, and all who have been here so many years now supporting those who need it most.
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Well here I am, JW dom seems like a past life at this point! An old aquaintance from JW child hood moved in down the street, obviously out of the Org also for some time. Has been living a few houses down a year or so now and still can't seem to speak to me! Old phobias die hard, especially when programmed in with fear.
Apostofest, so many years back now was a turning point for me. All the recovering, and "more recovered Ex JWs" proved to me I was sane and it was the mind control Org that was insane. Like finally comming out of OZ to discover the GB behind the curtain. I seem to be an exception, more recovered now then most. More normal. Haloween! Yes, it now represents fun!
I like to think it's all behind now, but that's not true. I will always have family cut off, treating me like dirt, expected to work around their "real lives," while I am expected to remain behind the sceens and somehow accept that. One of the fallen ones.........LOL! Shame for them, but shame on them also.
I remember Dave M. at apostofest. I was ranting about all the worlds troubles and seeking all the solutions to somehow fix it all. He smiled at me and said "Who do you think you are....Jesus?" That caused me to realize I am only a man, it lifted the weight of the world from my shoulders for probably the first time in my life. I knew I didn't have to be responsible for saving the world anymore. I never laughed with such a freedom and lightness. I have been laughing that way ever since.
Counting causualities, I look back, one childhood friend comitted suicide, self destructed. We didn't even grieve for him, no funeral, he was DFed. I still loved him however.
One Brother DF'ed, down the tubes, life in shambles.
Another brother also out and making a new life like myself, wonderful family.
One Brother still in, none of the kids married, yet all living at home in their mid twenties now, still waiting for the big A I suppose.
Org still blasting colledge, blasting marraige, condemning all intelectual progress, and pushing guilt to get hours to save the world, and be responsible for everyone out there, while ignoring those close, and ignoring self.
Strange it's the ones that went to colledge, and have good jobs, now getting married!
What pioneer can afford that anyway?
A religion that claims God does not heal the sick anymore, people are not Spirits, and in the next breath claims Demons can still get you! Don't go to garage sales lest you bring in the powerful Demons to your doorstep. Sheesh, I had forgotten so much of this old crap. Talk about empowering evil, while deflowering the power of Love.
A programmed, brain washed, robot, can not see that everything the Org produces is opposite of what it preaches it is. It's a choice to keep following fear, or choose death and leave the fear.
Takes time to clear out the "phobias" that were carefully groomed into us for years. Only then can one even see clear to think about the possibility of a God ever again, or even "no God." God is fear was so firmly implanted.
I still catch myself trying to save the world now and then. LOL! The truth is that the world must save itself, and each of us can only do the part of one person to assist that.
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Both my sons went to colledge. The oldest is now getting married. The news was at first happy news, then it started to sink in, a JW marraige. He's firmly planted within the Org structure, as is his bride to be. I was told to come to the wedding then leave and not attend the reception as all that will be present are Witnesses. My wife is totaly offended at this, and cannot fathom it at all.........life goes on "on the fence."
Still trying to catch my breath! Got to get grounded again, and make a firm decision here.
I used to be able to stand tall, while in the company of the perfect JW family, without fear.
I have been able to make Love more important. It's just after a few years of having a real family on my wifes side this is now so macaube. Like something out of a horror movie. It all comes back in, right where I left it.
There is a bond I have with my boys that is greater then any Church, I fear they do not see it the same however at this point. Just want them to be happy.
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On the brighter side I have a life! LOL! Been doing experiments in the garage for some years now and hosting a couple web sites on alternate energy. Talk about making friends all over the planet! It's truly amazing. There is life after the Org. You will get from it what you put into it.
Treat others with respect, that's what you will get back for the most part. Much closer relationships then any shallow judgemental JW groups ever offered. Seems I'm in deep water now, finally an adult, wiping my own nose, never asking any Elder berry anything important! LOL!
http://magnetism.50webs.com/
Levitation! Fun stuff. Demonic? Hex patterns - the devils spawn? Actually its just platonic vibration, the roots of all matter. Carbon is the footprint of 666 at the atomic level. Without it there would be no life on the planet. A shame we were programmed to fear such natural parts of our home world.
Anyone can perform party levitation, it works. A conscious principle, not demonic at all. Whew!
That's a load off.
I don't expect we will see too many advancements in science comming from Dubs, none can think clearly enough. One must have a firm and healthy emotional stability to build a mental knowledge base. Seems the Dubs are always so caught up in the emotional turmoil, there is little time for clear thought. Such a relief to be away from all that turmoil. You can't imagine it, if you are still in there being abused every day by all the self beating teachings. "Spiritual abuse" the closest vocabulary to express the reality being practiced that I remember.
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OK guys and gals any good apostate advice for me,
Should I bow out on the wedding and just forwards on a gift and a card?
Should I go endure the cerimony and then leave quick, offering my son what he has asked?
Should I take the wife along and have her join into my shell, and try to silence her to keep the peace? Introduce the happy normal wife to the state of dissaproval and isolation?
Qustions from an Ex JW?
I love you all,
Dave L
The only scary thing about the Jehovah's Witnesses is that 6 million people really beleive it!
