(Once again, it's a perfect day in Burbank, as the H! cast and the Board writers go milling about the studio. It seems nothing is out of the ordinary, but then there is an unexpected knock on the door.)
Loud: SOMEBODY GET THE DOOR!!! I'M PRACTICING MY PART FOR THE NEXT STORY RIGHT NOW!!!
Froggo: Wha? I didn't know anyone was expecting visitors.
BFB: Goopa? Goo-yi-a?
Cho: No, I don't think it is Yu-Gi-Oh. It seems lately that few of the anime folks want to visit any mor, save for the Pokemon gang. (Thumbs over at a Pikachu, scratching it head and sending sparks about)
Pikachu: Pika pika.
Loud: HEY BOURGEOIS, GET OFF YOUR LAZY BUTT AND GET THE DOOR, WILLYA?!
BB: Look, Baltimore brat, first of all, my butt has nothing to do with...
(Lydia comes rushing in)
Lydia: Mister Bourgeois, please don't go any further. I'm sure we can get this point across without using such crude language.
BB: "We" who? Is there another Lydia Karaoke in there? (opens Lydia's mouth) HELLO?!
Lydia: Bourgeois, that is not funny at all, now GET OFF MY FACE!!
BB: Bet if R6 was doing that, you'd be just fine with it...
Lydia: That's beside the point... WAIT A SECOND!!! (Sigh) Just get the door...
BB: Not that I live here, but alright.
(Bourgeois goes over to the front door, and opens it. What greets him is a flurry of kisses, including one to the lips. A sigh is heard amid all this)
BB: Oh... it's Charity Bazaar's cousin... and Nftnat, too... (Faints)
CC: Hello, all! Now that Bourgeois has begun to learn of the true talent of the females in my family, I can extend my greetings to the rest of you. Where's my favorite cousin hiding, hmm?
(As if on cue, Charity appears from the conference room, can of soda in hand)
Charity: I thought you said you weren't coming.
CC: No, I said I didn't have a way to get here. Lucky for me, nice mister Nftnat was in Baltimore for an importnt convention, and he agreed that we should pay you folks a visit.
Nftnat: ONLY after hearing you go Pepper Mills on me as soon as I mentioned that I know Bourgeois Buffoon... and the next time you want to eat a pecan custard in my car, forget about it! Or at least warn me about it before I make any hairpin turns.
(As the camera pans over to Nftnat, we see his car behind him... either those are frosted glass windows, or he's got frosting on the glass.)
CC: My bad. I'll try to be more considerate next time.
Charity: Well, what brings you here?
CC: A certain moth-to-a-flame attraction to BB.
Charity: I thought bugs hated fire.
CC: Moths love light, but never mind that. I was hoping to meet the other writers, where are they?
Charity: Maybe I should give you the grand tour. They're all running about somewhere.
(Enter Pule Houser and JusSonic)
Pule: CHAAAAAAAARITYYYYYYYYY!!!! JusSonic said he'd stuff me in the pinball machine again, makehimstop!!!!
JS: Well, if YOU would quit eating my donuts, and in fact, STAY OUTTA MY ROOM, this wouldn't be a problem, would it?
Charity: Guys, we have a GUEST!
JS: Oh... oh my... (JusSonic looks in Chairty's direction, and blushes... staring at him is the most beautiful woman he's ever laid eyes on) Hello there (Advances)
CC: Hi. I'm- (JS walks past her) huh?
JS: Miss Information, you stunning woman! To what do I owe the pleasure?
CC: Hmph!
Charity: THAT'S JusSonic.
CC: Well, he's certainly charming, isn't he?
Charity: He'll be alright once Miss Info leaves.
(Robert runs by, chasing a live lobster)
Lobster: No, no, no, you see? I am no lobster to cook. I-I work for Disney!
Robert: Disney?! DIE, CRUSTACEAN!!!
Lobster: (Sigh) First Hamton J. Pig, and now this guy.
Robert: GET BACK HERE!!! MY RESTAURANT NEEDS YOU IN THE TANK!!!
Charity: That's Robert.
CC: The lobster or the human being?
Charity: Most decidedly NOT the lobster, though I can't be sure at times.
(Enter R6)
R6: Hiya, Charity, and cousin. What's up?
CC: Oh, just my heart rate...
R6: Uh... are you okay?
Charity: She's fine.
R6: So are you.
(both girls blush a deep red)
Charity: Stop! You're such a sweet talker.
R6: You're a natural-born kisser, I'm a natural-born charmer (Pulls out a flute and basket, and begins playing, causing a snake to rise up) But some of us can turn out to be a real snake in the grass.
(The snake bites R6 before diving back in)
R6: YEEEEEEEEOWWWW!!!!!
Charity: Are you alright?
R6: Lucky thing that cobra wasn't poisonous...
CC: R6, cobras ARE poisonous...
R6: Ooops... forgot (Faints)
Charity: He's been bitten by that thing before, it's not even a cobra, anyway. Come on, let's find Father Time and ask him about that trip.
(The ladies leave as R6 lies there... still not moving. seconds later, Lydia walks by, stepping right over R6 (as opposed to stepping ON him...) but the view from there got him moving yet again... QC to Father Time's office, Charity and her cousin are in there talking to him)
FT: Well, only if the Board writers go too. I can't have you running around L.A. alone, you know. As long as you're here, you kids are my responsibility, and I don't want to be responsible for anything else (to self) like, say, medical bills, for instance.
Charity: Can't you come too?
FT: No, no, I've gotta get to a meeting with Sammy Melman and the writing staff today.
WOW: Ah, phooey, you just don't wanna trip over yer five-foot beard in the middle of Sunset Boulevard... again!
FT: On the other hand, if it gets me away from HER for a few hours...
WOW: I heard that!
FT: Uh... say, isn't that Bill Straitman over there?
WOW: Where?! Hey, Billy-boy! Come to Mama! (Runs off)
FT: Whew! Sorry, but I can't go. I'm responsible fo you kids, but also for the budgeting on Histeria! you'll be okay, just don't drive anyone crazy.
CC: Aside from the Board writers, you mean?
FT: No, they're already crazy.
(Rimshot from Toast, QC to BB, JS, R6, Robert, and Nftnat in a nondescript studio room)
All: We heard that!
(QC to R6's limo cruising down some highway, inside we hear... nothing. Zoom inside, we see Loud and Pule with their mouths duct-taped shut)
Aka: Sorry boys, but I'm not takin' any chances!
Loud: MMPH MMF MMMMF!!!
Toast: Wha?
Froggo: I think he said, "What a grouch!"
Pule: HMMM MMMF!! Mmmf mmf mmfmf!
Pepper: What if they're hungry?
Toast: We'll let them out of the tape AFTER we get out of the car.
BB: Tape and hunger don't mix.
JS: I don't think it's hunger, Pule just wants attention... that, or the tape itches.
BB: What gets me is how Aka could tape up a mouth as big as Loud's OR Pule's.
JS: Bourgeois....
BB: Best of all, Loud can't do a thing to me! (Camera pans back, we see that not only is his mouth taped shut, but Loud and Pule have their hands tied behind their backs)
JS: But I can...
BB: I'll behave.
JS: Good.
BB (To self): For now...
JS: What was that?
BB: Uh, what was what?
R6: Cut it out, you two. Honestly, sometimes I think BB loves humiliating Loud more than he loves Charity. And JusSonic only wants to impress Charity by sticking up for her over-vocalized boyfriend!
JS: What was that, Philadelphian?
Robert: Hey, there's two of us here, ya know.
JS: Uh... I can't win this one, can I?
BB/R6/Robert: Nah.
JS: Fine, but YOU (Points at BB) better watch yourself!
BB: Like most ladies do.
JS: Plucky Duck, your ego has met its match.
BB: HEY!!!
R6: You guys, chill out!
LB: Yes, now!
Cho: Quiet, Lucky Bob! You are only supposed to say that for me!
LB: Kiss, now!
(As Lucky Bob and Cho-Cho kiss, we see flashing lights behind the limo. Suddenly, a ptrol car speeds past, followed by another... and then by a red Ferrari. The limo swerves to get out of the last one's way)
BB: Lousy Burbank commuters!
Nftnat: Bourgeois, those were the police.
BB: OK, lousy Hollywood commuters!
(Rimshot from Big Fat Baby)
Nftnat: Somehow, I expected that out of you, especi-unh! What was that! It feels like the car just got hit!
(Outside, indeed the car was hit, and it also jumped the guardrail. They're going over the side of the highway!)
BB: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
JS: Oh, this is NOOOOOTT good!
Charity/CC: I-I-I-I'm not ha-ha-happy!
Robert: Are-are-are you ever?
R6: Not now, we're gonna-
(The car crashes into a creek below. screen goes all black. Moments later, we see the gang recovering from the initial shock at a rest stop, and ambulance present, and paramedics tending to them. After a few moments, they gater their things and leave, albeit with their siren and lights on)
Loud: MUST BE ANOTHER EMERGENCY!!!
BB: Even after such a ride, he's still a major pain in my...
JS: Bourgeois...!
BB: Sorry.
Loud: AH, forget about it, we're near L.A. Let's get going.
BB: Good idea, for-
JS: Just stop it right there!
CC: Come on, BB, let's get a move on.
(The gang leaves, we see them walking down some street or another in Los Angeles a few seconds later. As the walk, they pass the cast of TTA, Tohru, Booker T, and Pinky & the Brain in the background.)
Nftnat: So, what should we do first?
Pepper: AHA!!! LET'S GO STARGAZING!!!
Toast: Babe, it's not even dark yet.
Pepper: I meant "movie stargazing", my delectable dinner roll.
Toast: Dinner sounds like a great idea. But only AFTER 6 PM.
Robert: I'd like to do a little sightseeing, myself.
Cho: I'm up for that. And my bank account is, as well.
LB: Hi-yo!!!
Aka: I dunno, people. I feel like something's missing from ol' L.A.
Froggo: Yeah, shouldn't we be feeling a general lack of enthusiasm, having been here so often? You know what I mean, don't you Loud?
CC: I don't know about that, I've never been here before, but I do notice a lack of excitement... and yet, I don't notice it at all. (Thinks a bit) OH NO!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!
BB: Sweetie, what is it?
CC: Back at the rest stop! And call me that more often!
Nftnat: The rest stop?
Loud: Yeah, we were saved there, and then they had some other emergency.
CC: That's just it!!! We gotta get to the hospital!!
Toast: Why?
CC: The other emergency!!!
(Charity's Cousin runs off, and the others, seeing no viable choice, follow her. QC to the reception desk at L.A. General)
CC: Excuse me, sir. Have any patients been admitted recently
Doc: Well, why do you- HEY, you're the cast of Histeria!
BB: Another satisfied viewer...
Doc: Until now... Looks like yer short one member. And who might YOU be?
BB: Bourgeois Buffoon. And the others you might not recognize are the writers of the EH Board (Writers wave). And the cast is short NO ONE. Here's Froggo, Aka, Pepper, Toast, Charity. Father Time and World's Oldest had a meeting with Bill, Sammy and Chit. And here's Big Fat Baby, Lucky Bob, Cho-Cho, the world's biggest sewer rat... (indicating Loud)... Smartypants was supposed to meet us at the Staples Center, and Miss Info's at the meeting also... waitaminute! WHERE'S PULE?!
Pule (Standing behind Robert): I'm right here... and that was Charity's Cousin you pointed to...
BB: Yeah, I forgot to include her, since she's not really a "regular" member of the... hold it a second. (Counts again) Hmm, I think I'm missing some-... AH NOOOOO!!!
CC: I KNEW it! Charity musta been in the ambulance!
Doc: She wasn't doing well when they brought her in. She was hurt pretty bad.. medics said she may be mortally wounded...
BB/CC: As in...
Doc: Fatal wound...
Aka: FATAL?!
Loud: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Doc: She wasn't alone... all that we could find to identify the other person was THIS (Tosses BB a silver chainpiece)
BB: Hm... It's got a letter "J" inscribed on it...
Froggo/Toast: Got me there.
Robert: A "J".... (Voice changes to match Valmont for this next part)... oh no. Oh no! OH NO! OH NOOOOOOOOO!!! (Voce revertas back to normal)... That was weird... QUCIK, which room is she in?!
Doc: Third floor, room 12.
CC: Thanks, gotta run!
(QC to a lightning bolt running towards the ER, we see two stretchers come out of a hallway, the figures on them cannot be determined, but the H! cast and writers are following closely, an emotional mess)
BB: NOOOOO!!! WHY?!
Loud: WHY,CRUEL FATE, WHY?!
Pepper: Can you hear me? AHA!!! ****it, don't you DARE leave me!!!
Toast: Hang in there, it's gonna be fine!
Aka: FINE?! Charity's in terrible pain, and Unless I miss my guess, HALF of our Philly faction is goin down too, and I don't mean the proprietor of a ritzy waterfront restaurant! THIS IS NOT FAIR!!!
Froggo: This is so wrong!!! DON'T DIE ON US, YOU HEAR?!!!
Doc: I'm sorry, but all that screaming will distract the specialists. Please just wait out here for them.
Aka: D-doc... will they...
Doc: I can only hope so.
(Aka begins to cry, and buries her head in her hands. Froggo puts an arm around her, which softens her crying a bit, but even HE has a tear in his eye. Toast holds Pepper tightly, while the writers stand there looking miserable. BB has Charity's Cousin in his arms, she too is crying. Doc leaves the emotional scene, the cast looks in the window.
BB: Can you see anything besides the covers and a bunch of doctors?
Robert: No, just that.
Nftnat: This looks ominous. How could we not notice them missing.
JS: Absorbed in the glitz and glamour of Hollywood...
Froggo: I better call Smarty and tell him. Probably should call Father Time, too.
Loud: Yeah, you do that.
(Froggo leaves, and the rest look into the window some more. Seconds later, the specialists exit, look at this kids and writers, and keep going on. Looking back in the window, we see two heart monitors... after about six seconds, both simultaneously flat-line...)
Aka: NO!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
BB: It-it-it can't be! ****it, no!!!
Pepper: AHA!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!! NOT THIS WAY!!!!
Robert: I can't believe this!
Nftnat: Oh, of all the accidents in the world, why did this one take such a toll?! And why of all cruel fates, did this one befall us?!
JS: Our friend... our co-writer... and our beloved Charity... gone.
(At this point, everyone is crying. Froggo comes back, and seems puzzled by the sudden tears)
Froggo: Well, Smarty's on his way... But, why the waterworks?
Toast: D-d-dude...
(Froggo can now tell, by the look in their eyes, what has transpired.)
Froggo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
(Now Froggo joins the crying game To Be Continued)
Post responses and reactions please. After that, then I'll add the second part.
That's it! I warned you not to get Charity killed, but you went and did it anyway! And second of all,how dare you tied my favorite male H! character up like that! You are in an alliance with BB are you, are you?! One thing for sure, if I ever see you in a desert and you want some water, I am NOT getting you any!
(calms down)
Sorry about that. I am kinda freaked out about this. But don't you two ever EVER do that again!
In my guesses I mentioned that perhaps you would have the guts to kill yourself, and you did. But you are playing with fire here. You kill yourself which will kill Lydia emotionally, and you kill Charity which the other Board members will hate you for forever, unless you resurrect her pronto. But then again, killing a major character does create more of a dramatic effect and increases the tragedy, that might be worth something, but ONLY IF they come back to us at the end. I had a feeling it would be a major character after the Toast guesses were wrong, but then I was sure Pule or someone else minor would get it. Oh, I hope you're prepared for a certain surviving writer's rant that will certainly come later....oh, and RIP, for now.
I do have a complaint after all about Charity's demise. I didn't say anything because I thought this would lead to some good stuff later, I didn't wish it would happen at all, but as I said, it makes it more interesting and has more effect on us, and should lead to some touching and dramatic scenes.{You all know that's right up my alley if you know me at all}But a small complaint is: this happened too soon after Nifnat's nightmare fic. Just after Loud has a dream about losing Charity to B.B he loses her for real to the Grim Reaper, that's a little bit unfair. Then again, that took place on Halloween, this is a few weeks later, but still. And again, perpare for more bitter complaints later from the others, dead writer man.
...I'm impressed. So it turns out good ole R6 and Charity are pushing up dasies. Which means I'm safe. But Charity isn't. Which means I'm angry! Which means I'm also sad...
....(QC to a room. BB puts a flower over a Charity shrine)
Au revior, ma amie.
In all respects, keep up the excellent writing. It's nice to have some new fics again from you!
Death hurts... and anywayz, JusSonic, I doubt even YOU would want to hear "99 Bottles of Beer" from Loud, certainly not from Pule, and DEFINITELY no duets (And I dont mean Nostra's dating show)... and I like deserts, especially pineapple chessecake...
No Bourgeois, you're NOT safe. With Charity dead, YOU must comfort her cousin, a daunting task indeed... and I think that her spirit has a few things to discuss with you...
I'm prepared, everyone... do your worst...
One more thing... If I'd killed Loud, then JusSonic would have kicked my @$$ all over the Board, but I kill Charity, and nearly EVERYONE else does... Remember, Charity's the obscure one, the girl whose death would probably go unnoticed at first if everyone were left to their own devices, then when she's needed an not alive to call on, it's boo-hoo-hoo for the H! cast.
And yes, I DO have the guts, the spine, the other necessary functioning parts associated with bravery, to kill myself off.
(At the hospital between parts)
Loud: Ding-dong, the 6 is dead!
Everyone else: KNOCK IT OFF!!!
Loud: Well, I'm not singing about Charity...
BB: Yeah, 'cause you love her! Imagine, if Lydia were here, what she'd do to you for singing that about her... OUR friend!
(Loud thinks for a second, then screams)
Loud: No! NOOOOOOOOO!!!! I'M SORRY, R6!!! PLEASE DON'T HAUNT ME IN MY SLEEP!!!
BB: Never say that to a ghost...
Loud: Well, shouldn't YOU be mad, since Charity's gone now?
BB: I... uh...
(Above them, Charity's ghost and R6's ghost watch the scene, laughing their heads off... which wouldn't hurt, considering the circumstances.)
So don't think I killed Charity just to kill her... I'm dead also, it makes a balance... which reminds me, I'm DEAD, so I should get back to my ghostly form now (Floats away)
R6 playing with fire? Well, one that hates ice must LOVE fire... In fact, I make it a point to stake out the warmest places in Philly, and stay there until I decide to go to work (Or home, or... wherever)
And I anticipate getting it worse than BB did after ATL, but Nftnat did have that nightmare bit... fear not, my Southern friend... YOU'RE not gonna get it from them, but ME getting it... well, whoever writes the flaming response from the H! cast about this, like I said, I can take the heat... do your worst
(Sorry about that, but with the hoildays coming up, and precious vacation time limited, R6 is a bit less than caring about his own self... maybe that's why he's offed himself for a bit...)
With you and Charity gone, Lydia and Loud will be especially heartbroken{though Lydia may do a much better job of hiding it}and Lydia and Loud happen to be Miss Info's two best friends. So B.B by comparision has it easy, he just has a cousin to comfort, but then again in her grief she may be especially determined to receive some love from him. Still at least B.B doesn't have the certain responsibility to deal with the heartbreak of two close friends like Miss Info probably will. This is because I assume R6 made that connection between them quickly and he himself created Miss Info and Lydia's connection plus had a scene between the former lady and Loud in his first fic. Well, we'll see tomorrow.
For the record, I set up that Loud & MI scene in ATG. As to what's happening here, the first thing I can say is, wow. The second thing is someone's timing stinks. I'm nice enough to give Charity's Cousin a ride to visit her favorite cousin & finally meet the object of her obsession --- bearing in mind this is the first time I've been west of Dallas --- & look what happens. I would theorize that B.B. has his own Charity issues to work through, in addition to comforting the cousin. This does make what I did pale in comparison, tho I wonder what Froggo & Aka will do, as Loud & Charity are among their best friends as well. The KC members have always been there for each other, & now... Well, maybe R6 took the easy way out by offing himself. I imagine Lydia will go numb, not really reacting to anything, y'know, the whole emotional shutdown thing; until the funeral, & then look out! Wouldn't surprise me if she tried to go with him, be buried with him, et al. And Loud? I'm surprised @ how he's taking it in this latest installment. Maybe laughter to hide the pain? I don't think I'll be having the cast reaction to what happens here, so if anyone else wants to, feel free. Oh, & I would say thanks for finally introducing me into fanfics, R6, but I think LB1985 beat you to it in that Rugrats crossover. Otoh, there was the trailer. My first scene rocked; I think I'm gonna like it here. Now if y'all'll pardon me I'd better get that interview with C.C. together.
Hello! Lydia Karaoke, ,message board censor here. I'm afraid, Mr. R6, that we can't have anyone getting killed on this show. Therefore, by my request, I would like you to please limit Charity's injuries to amnesia, at the most.
But as far as I'm concerned, YOU can stay deceased!
... alright, whoever's playing games, it DOES NOT faze THIS Northsider, so quit trying.
And if this is one of the Board members trying to trick me, guess what? I CANNOT BE FOOLED!! So reveal yourself!
Although, this DOES remind me of a post recieved sometime in late summer, that one addressed, "Dearest Bourgeois"...
So whoever it is, Nya Nyah! You can't scare me!! HA HA!!!
And to everyone else, if not for the above post, this post would actually be Part 2 of the story, but now, you'll just have to wait a bit longer... not THAT much longer, though... just until I'm finished laughing at this pitiful attempt to dishonor the name of the great R6!
And whoever claims to be Lydia... that's SIR R6 to you!
Boo, Lydia impersinator for delaying our fic...oh, and for insulting R6, I suppose. I'm getting off now, so I won't see what will happen next until 11 AM tomorrow, so until then.
Hey, this is already up to 11 replys and we're not even at Part 2 yet! If this is a popularity contest, R6 is winning it.
Sorry! My bad! I didn't mean to insult you, R6. I was just trying to add a bit of mystery and intrigue by having a mysterious "Lydia" try to intervene. Of course, good intentions never work. So let me submit my humble apologies. You can get on with your fic, I'm not saying a word.
BTW, I was hoping that norung would show up and disclaim his having anything to do with this sensless joke. It didn't work, but I would like to know, where is he already?
(Still at the hospital, the H! cast, minus Charity, and the Board writers, minus R6, are all in a deep funk. After about a solid minute of this, Smartypants enters.)
MSP: So, uh, how are they doing?
(Sobs from the others and several solemn faces appear to relay the message)
MSP: Oh... that's awful... And if you think it's hard on you all, think of what everyone back at the studio is gonna do.
Loud: I... KNOW!!!
Froggo: I already told Father Time they were seriously injured, I don't think he's ready for THIS!
Aka: None of us are, Froggy. Charity was so young.
BB: So brave...
JS: And so loved...
Nftnat: There hasn't been a death so tragic since Lady Di was killed in that car crash back in 1997.
Toast: Man, that's not the worst of it... Charity was so close to Loud... and hE was so close to Miss Information... imagine how SHE'S gonna feel, just seeing Loud so depressed, aside from how she'd feel about this situation as it is.
(All stare at Toast for a bit, not expecting something so deep from the surfer they've come to know and love)
Toast: What? What I say?
Pepper: Toast, that was... so... BEAUTIFUL!!! AHA!!! (Flings her arms around her beloved, thouroughly soaking his left shoulder)
CC: I come all the way out here to see my favorite cousin, and... and she... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! This is all MY fault! I wanted to take this trip, and if I hadn't come here for it, she'd still be here!
(Bourgeois puts an arm around her, which makes her momentarily forget her plight. She even lets out a lovestruck sigh, though it's hard to tell that's what it was, due to the tears streaming down her face.)
BB: Hey, don't start that. What would Charity do right now, what would she say right now? Think of that.
CC: I'm not happy... Though if you keep me in your arms like this, I'll be just fine...
(Bourgeois sighs, this one sounding like a mixture of misery, exasperation, and just a hint of love...)
(Moments later, we see the gang all piling into Smarty's car, preparing to head for home. After htey are all inside, we hear some conversation)
Aka: This just feels so wrong.
Loud: Tell me about it.
Froggo: Yeah.
Loud: I'm so scrunched up, I can't feel my left leg anymore!
Aka: Not that! Charity and R6 just... going... (She cries, and buries her head in Froggo's shoulder)
Froggo: Hey, uh, I just thought of something.
Pepper: What?
Froggo: How's Lydia gonna take this?
BB: CRUD!!!
JS: I forgot! She was actually starting to fall for the little creep!
Robert: Calling names won't solve anything...
JS: Uh, sorry.
BB: Losing one boyfriend to his own greed and vegeance, and now another to the great beyond... I can imagine how she'd take it.
CC: What, was she fond of R6?
BB: I'd not know how to put it...
JS: R6 had a crush on her so strong, it could flatten Mount Everest...
Nftnat: But Lydia... well, she had a bit of a problem with him... She thought he was kinda repulsive...
Robert: Yet, there was some attraction, and it slowly grew into what seemed like...
BB: Love.
Aka: Yeah, and from the looks of things, she had her heart set on keeping him... till death do they part, if you cath my drift.
CC: Oh... Ooooooooooohhhh... How romantic...
(Bourgeois once again places an arm around Charity's Cousin, and the car pulls off.... but not too far behind are some familiar figures... in fact, the only thing different about them are the transparent look, and floating ability.)
R6: HEY, come back!
Charity: WAIT!!!
(As the car pulls away, exhaust envelops the two, who are now apparently ghosts. Charity begins coughing wildly. As the smoke clears...)
R6: Well, this is our afterlife. They don't know we can't find our bodies right now, and if we're buried, then our spirits will stay like this...
Charity: I'm not happy.
R6: I know... I'm not feelin' so great about this myself...
(Several cars pass through them)
R6: But I love bein' transparent!
Charity: Well, if we can't get the gang's attention, we can't get any help, so what to do?
R6: I dunno... (notices that he's able to snap sticks off of trees) Maybe we can just tap one of them.
Charity: Well, controlling transparency is one thing, but what if they can't see us?
R6: I don't know... I just don't know...
(Back at the studio)
FT: Oh good, you're back! How are they doing, is it serious?
(Solemn stares answer him, though he doesn't get the meaning)
FT: What?
(Again, silence)
FT: Y-y-you d-d-don't mean...
(Everyone nods)
FT: Oh, boy... This is my fault. I should've gone with you all...
CC: You had the bord meeting. (SNIF)
FT: It matters not. Sammy Melman never showed up, so it was cancelled. I think he ran across one of his exes today.
BB: That would account for it.
Toast: How many jealous exes does he have?
FT: I've no idea, but it's enough to keep him busy every day of the week. This on top of the fact that he doesn't see each individual ex more than once a month.
Toast: WHOA!!!
Pepper: Talk about love lost!
Pule: I doubt it.
JS: Why?
Pule: With him, it's more like love lost and found!
Nftnat: Too bad his record shows so many losses.
FT: Never mind that. I can't bear to think of how everyone else will take this.
Loud: You didn't tell them?
FT: Don't have the heart... espeially not Lydia, she was almost a wreck after learning about Louis, and since she new how R6 felt... this could be the final nail in her proverbial coffin
Aka: Yeah, and the first nail in her literal one!
(BFB rimshot)
Froggo: Aka, you're so cold.
Aka: Well, I can't be too sad about this... I'm not experienced.
(that just brings on the tears, including Aka, as the remark reminds them of Charity)
FT: Well, we can't let Lydia know... not for anything!
MSP: I know it better than you, she'll find out soon enough on her own.
Robert: He's got a point.
FT: Well, we'll do our best...
(A few hours later, we see Miss Info walking down the hall, and Loud walking towards her. Miss Info stops upon noticing the downcast look on Loud's face)
Miss Info: Something wrong, honey?
Loud: Well...
Miss Info: You look almost like you just lost yer best friend.
Loud: I did... (Begins cying)
Miss Info: well, honey, it happens sooner or later, but we all must remain strong. I guess you found out sooner than expected, huh?
Loud: What?
Miss Info: Well, about yer best friend, of course. Just 'cause a friend left without saying goodbe is no reason to get all depressed, sweetie.
Loud: Uh... if you think I'm upset about Fetch, I already know he's on a date with Colleen.
(We see Fetch riding a motorcycle, with Colleen from Road Rovers holding on behind him)
Fetch: Hunter, eat yer heart out!
(QC back)
Loud: I'm at a greater loss... Charity... she... she...
Miss Info: She what?
Loud: She's GONE!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
(Miss Info is a bit confused at first, but she soon realizes what Loud means. Knowing nothing more to do, she holds him.)
Miss Info: There, there, honey. It's alright. Let it all out.
Loud: That's not the worst of it...
Miss Info: What do ya mean?
Loud: She's not alone...
Miss Info: Someone else went with her?
(Loud merely looks at her, and continues crying. Outside, we can hear a voice, Robert's. He seems to be saying something about the trip back to Philadelphia being a long, lonely one. Miss Info can't make it out exactly, but she takes the meaning.)
Miss Info (To self): Oh, dear... (A tear slides down her cheek, as well)
(THE NEXT DAY)
(All seems normal throughout the studios. After a good day's mourning, the gang are ready to get on with their lives... just not with so much enthusiasm. Loud is moping about the snack bar, Froggo and Aka are rehearsing a song, and the Board writers are walking about, pencils behind ears, and notepads in hands. Pepper and Toast have found a way to cope with their sadness... Olympic tongue wrestling... Lydia is in her office, frantically searching for something)
Lydia: Where is it? I know I grabbed the papers when I came in here, now where did they get to? And who took my newspaper? I always find it in front of my office door, every day, so who could have THAT? There's enough stuff here to go around, yet it wouldn't seem lke it!
(The "paper" in question is a script for a scene involving Charity, Loud, R6, and Toast, but if she finds out R6 is... deceased, well... You could guess the results. Lydia goes out searching, and finds Miss Info)
Lydia: Melissa, have you seen that script I had?
(Miss Information seems kinda lost)
Miss Info: Huh? Oh, no I haven't, Lydia. Sorry.
Lydia: That's not all, someone's stolen my newspaper, and... hey, are you alright? You normally get all huffy if I call you Melissa in public.
Miss Info: I... I, uh... (Blinks hard to conceal a tear, but that doesn't fool Lydia, who knows when she's been crying)
Lydia: Come on, out with it... You've been crying again, and as your best friend, I feel I should be informed as to why.
Miss Info: Nothing, really. Not a thing...
Lydia: Well... HEY, that's today's paper! Mind if I...
Miss Info: NO!!!
Lydia: Aw, come on, be a sport!
(Lydia grabs the paper before Miss Info can react)
Miss Info: Uh-oh...
Lydia: Hmm... says here a celebrity had passed yesterday... and it's...
(Lydia freezes upon seeing who was mentioned)
Lydia: Charity Bazaar?! Tell me this is a joke!
Miss Info: Not at all...
Lydia: Oh, how awful... Why didn't I know of this sooner? She passed yesterday, so I imagine the cast knew of this then...
(Lydia continues reading, turning her back to avoid Miss Info snatching the paper away. After about a minute, she stands bolt upright. We pan out to reveal the whole studio, as an ear-pirecing scream is heard. Back inside, we only see a trail of dust and hear the slamming of a door, followed by a lot of loud crying)
Miss Info: I know just how you feel, honey... (More tears are shed)
(Pan up to the ceiling to reveal the ghosts of Charity Bazaar and R6 observing)
R6: My beloved... this will surely break her heart. After losing one man to his own devices, she loses me at the hands of whatever moron rear-ended my limo.
Charity: I sympathize.
R6: No, no music, not now.
Charity (Rolling her eyes): "Sympathize", not "synthesize". I know how you feel, and I share your pain.
R6: Sorry, but misery isn't my forte. I had to liven things up a bit.
Charity: Loud hasn't screamed much, save for crying, BB's acting NORMAL... well, more like a slodier than himself, anyway, and my cousin's been in tears for hours, only finding comfort in BB.
R6: You know, thos two would make the...
Charity: Not a chance!
R6: Beg to differ... look sharp! (Points to BB and Charity's cousin, sitting in the conference room, alone)
BB: I can imagine how this is for you. You... well, mentioning how I felt about Charity won't help much, but you know the deal.
CC: My heart has broken in too many places. Charity was my favorite relative. She came to Baltimore more often than I came here, but I was always glad to be around her. Sure she was miserable, but I loved her anyway! In fact, her misery was part of why I liked her so much... she was quiet, but not TOO quiet... (A tear streams down her cheek)
BB: Hey, if it helps, I'll be quiet and miserable for the both of us.
Charity: Ah, same ol' Bourgeois... glad to see THAT...
CC: You're sweet, BB. Thank you.
(Charity watches lovingly as her cousin flings her arms around BB. Then comes a pause... a long stare. Charity watches, intrigued)
CC: You know, you're really cute in those glasses.
BB: I.. I, uh, well they...
(Charity's cousin wastes no time. She tosses her hair back, pulls Bourgeois to her, and lays a kiss dead smack on his lips... and it's one so passionate, that it could weld BB's glasses to his face...)
Charity: Oooh! That little...
R6: Jealous, Charity?
Charity: No! But I'm not happy.
R6: Why?
Charity: She just kissed him like that! How could she?
R6: She likes him... ever think of that?
Charity: Ah, put a cork in it!
R6: Tell that to THEM...
(Down below..)
BB: WOW!!!
CC: Runs in the family, like I said...
BB: You weren't lying! So.. uh... younever DID mention what your name was...
CC: (Whispers something in his ear) But don't tell anyone... Only Charity, and now, YOU know it...
BB: My lips are sealed!
(CC kisses him again)
CC: NOW they are, my love.
(Back above)
Charity: How beautiful... she must really love him, if she told him her first name.
R6: What IS it, anyway?
Charity: Sorry, classified information.
R6: No, that's Miss Info's brother. What's YOUR cousin's first name?
Charity: Her LAST name is Bazaar, and that's all you get.
R6: Well, despite it, I feel like spreading the happiness. And since we can't be seen by these guys...
(Charity and R6 give the camera a mischevious grin, and float away... TO BE CONTINUED)
(Still at the hospital, the H! cast, minus Charity, and the Board writers, minus R6, are all in a deep funk. After about a solid minute of this, Smartypants enters.)
MSP: So, uh, how are they doing?
(Sobs from the others and several solemn faces appear to relay the message)
MSP: Oh... that's awful... And if you think it's hard on you all, think of what everyone back at the studio is gonna do.
Loud: I... KNOW!!!
Froggo: I already told Father Time they were seriously injured, I don't think he's ready for THIS!
Aka: None of us are, Froggy. Charity was so young.
BB: So brave...
JS: And so loved...
Nftnat: There hasn't been a death so tragic since Lady Di was killed in that car crash back in 1997.
Toast: Man, that's not the worst of it... Charity was so close to Loud... and hE was so close to Miss Information... imagine how SHE'S gonna feel, just seeing Loud so depressed, aside from how she'd feel about this situation as it is.
(All stare at Toast for a bit, not expecting something so deep from the surfer they've come to know and love)
Toast: What? What I say?
Pepper: Toast, that was... so... BEAUTIFUL!!! AHA!!! (Flings her arms around her beloved, thouroughly soaking his left shoulder)
CC: I come all the way out here to see my favorite cousin, and... and she... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! This is all MY fault! I wanted to take this trip, and if I hadn't come here for it, she'd still be here!
(Bourgeois puts an arm around her, which makes her momentarily forget her plight. She even lets out a lovestruck sigh, though it's hard to tell that's what it was, due to the tears streaming down her face.)
BB: Hey, don't start that. What would Charity do right now, what would she say right now? Think of that.
CC: I'm not happy... Though if you keep me in your arms like this, I'll be just fine...
(Bourgeois sighs, this one sounding like a mixture of misery, exasperation, and just a hint of love...)
(Moments later, we see the gang all piling into Smarty's car, preparing to head for home. After htey are all inside, we hear some conversation)
Aka: This just feels so wrong.
Loud: Tell me about it.
Froggo: Yeah.
Loud: I'm so scrunched up, I can't feel my left leg anymore!
Aka: Not that! Charity and R6 just... going... (She cries, and buries her head in Froggo's shoulder)
Froggo: Hey, uh, I just thought of something.
Pepper: What?
Froggo: How's Lydia gonna take this?
BB: CRUD!!!
JS: I forgot! She was actually starting to fall for the little creep!
Robert: Calling names won't solve anything...
JS: Uh, sorry.
BB: Losing one boyfriend to his own greed and vegeance, and now another to the great beyond... I can imagine how she'd take it.
CC: What, was she fond of R6?
BB: I'd not know how to put it...
JS: R6 had a crush on her so strong, it could flatten Mount Everest...
Nftnat: But Lydia... well, she had a bit of a problem with him... She thought he was kinda repulsive...
Robert: Yet, there was some attraction, and it slowly grew into what seemed like...
BB: Love.
Aka: Yeah, and from the looks of things, she had her heart set on keeping him... till death do they part, if you cath my drift.
CC: Oh... Ooooooooooohhhh... How romantic...
(Bourgeois once again places an arm around Charity's Cousin, and the car pulls off.... but not too far behind are some familiar figures... in fact, the only thing different about them are the transparent look, and floating ability.)
R6: HEY, come back!
Charity: WAIT!!!
(As the car pulls away, exhaust envelops the two, who are now apparently ghosts. Charity begins coughing wildly. As the smoke clears...)
R6: Well, this is our afterlife. They don't know we can't find our bodies right now, and if we're buried, then our spirits will stay like this...
Charity: I'm not happy.
R6: I know... I'm not feelin' so great about this myself...
(Several cars pass through them)
R6: But I love bein' transparent!
Charity: Well, if we can't get the gang's attention, we can't get any help, so what to do?
R6: I dunno... (notices that he's able to snap sticks off of trees) Maybe we can just tap one of them.
Charity: Well, controlling transparency is one thing, but what if they can't see us?
R6: I don't know... I just don't know...
(Back at the studio)
FT: Oh good, you're back! How are they doing, is it serious?
(Solemn stares answer him, though he doesn't get the meaning)
FT: What?
(Again, silence)
FT: Y-y-you d-d-don't mean...
(Everyone nods)
FT: Oh, boy... This is my fault. I should've gone with you all...
CC: You had the bord meeting. (SNIF)
FT: It matters not. Sammy Melman never showed up, so it was cancelled. I think he ran across one of his exes today.
BB: That would account for it.
Toast: How many jealous exes does he have?
FT: I've no idea, but it's enough to keep him busy every day of the week. This on top of the fact that he doesn't see each individual ex more than once a month.
Toast: WHOA!!!
Pepper: Talk about love lost!
Pule: I doubt it.
JS: Why?
Pule: With him, it's more like love lost and found!
Nftnat: Too bad his record shows so many losses.
FT: Never mind that. I can't bear to think of how everyone else will take this.
Loud: You didn't tell them?
FT: Don't have the heart... espeially not Lydia, she was almost a wreck after learning about Louis, and since she new how R6 felt... this could be the final nail in her proverbial coffin
Aka: Yeah, and the first nail in her literal one!
(BFB rimshot)
Froggo: Aka, you're so cold.
Aka: Well, I can't be too sad about this... I'm not experienced.
(that just brings on the tears, including Aka, as the remark reminds them of Charity)
FT: Well, we can't let Lydia know... not for anything!
MSP: I know it better than you, she'll find out soon enough on her own.
Robert: He's got a point.
FT: Well, we'll do our best...
(A few hours later, we see Miss Info walking down the hall, and Loud walking towards her. Miss Info stops upon noticing the downcast look on Loud's face)
Miss Info: Something wrong, honey?
Loud: Well...
Miss Info: You look almost like you just lost yer best friend.
Loud: I did... (Begins cying)
Miss Info: well, honey, it happens sooner or later, but we all must remain strong. I guess you found out sooner than expected, huh?
Loud: What?
Miss Info: Well, about yer best friend, of course. Just 'cause a friend left without saying goodbe is no reason to get all depressed, sweetie.
Loud: Uh... if you think I'm upset about Fetch, I already know he's on a date with Colleen.
(We see Fetch riding a motorcycle, with Colleen from Road Rovers holding on behind him)
Fetch: Hunter, eat yer heart out!
(QC back)
Loud: I'm at a greater loss... Charity... she... she...
Miss Info: She what?
Loud: She's GONE!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
(Miss Info is a bit confused at first, but she soon realizes what Loud means. Knowing nothing more to do, she holds him.)
Miss Info: There, there, honey. It's alright. Let it all out.
Loud: That's not the worst of it...
Miss Info: What do ya mean?
Loud: She's not alone...
Miss Info: Someone else went with her?
(Loud merely looks at her, and continues crying. Outside, we can hear a voice, Robert's. He seems to be saying something about the trip back to Philadelphia being a long, lonely one. Miss Info can't make it out exactly, but she takes the meaning.)
Miss Info (To self): Oh, dear... (A tear slides down her cheek, as well)
(THE NEXT DAY)
(All seems normal throughout the studios. After a good day's mourning, the gang are ready to get on with their lives... just not with so much enthusiasm. Loud is moping about the snack bar, Froggo and Aka are rehearsing a song, and the Board writers are walking about, pencils behind ears, and notepads in hands. Pepper and Toast have found a way to cope with their sadness... Olympic tongue wrestling... Lydia is in her office, frantically searching for something)
Lydia: Where is it? I know I grabbed the papers when I came in here, now where did they get to? And who took my newspaper? I always find it in front of my office door, every day, so who could have THAT? There's enough stuff here to go around, yet it wouldn't seem lke it!
(The "paper" in question is a script for a scene involving Charity, Loud, R6, and Toast, but if she finds out R6 is... deceased, well... You could guess the results. Lydia goes out searching, and finds Miss Info)
Lydia: Melissa, have you seen that script I had?
(Miss Information seems kinda lost)
Miss Info: Huh? Oh, no I haven't, Lydia. Sorry.
Lydia: That's not all, someone's stolen my newspaper, and... hey, are you alright? You normally get all huffy if I call you Melissa in public.
Miss Info: I... I, uh... (Blinks hard to conceal a tear, but that doesn't fool Lydia, who knows when she's been crying)
Lydia: Come on, out with it... You've been crying again, and as your best friend, I feel I should be informed as to why.
Miss Info: Nothing, really. Not a thing...
Lydia: Well... HEY, that's today's paper! Mind if I...
Miss Info: NO!!!
Lydia: Aw, come on, be a sport!
(Lydia grabs the paper before Miss Info can react)
Miss Info: Uh-oh...
Lydia: Hmm... says here a celebrity had passed yesterday... and it's...
(Lydia freezes upon seeing who was mentioned)
Lydia: Charity Bazaar?! Tell me this is a joke!
Miss Info: Not at all...
Lydia: Oh, how awful... Why didn't I know of this sooner? She passed yesterday, so I imagine the cast knew of this then...
(Lydia continues reading, turning her back to avoid Miss Info snatching the paper away. After about a minute, she stands bolt upright. We pan out to reveal the whole studio, as an ear-pirecing scream is heard. Back inside, we only see a trail of dust and hear the slamming of a door, followed by a lot of loud crying)
Miss Info: I know just how you feel, honey... (More tears are shed)
(Pan up to the ceiling to reveal the ghosts of Charity Bazaar and R6 observing)
R6: My beloved... this will surely break her heart. After losing one man to his own devices, she loses me at the hands of whatever moron rear-ended my limo.
Charity: I sympathize.
R6: No, no music, not now.
Charity (Rolling her eyes): "Sympathize", not "synthesize". I know how you feel, and I share your pain.
R6: Sorry, but misery isn't my forte. I had to liven things up a bit.
Charity: Loud hasn't screamed much, save for crying, BB's acting NORMAL... well, more like a slodier than himself, anyway, and my cousin's been in tears for hours, only finding comfort in BB.
R6: You know, thos two would make the...
Charity: Not a chance!
R6: Beg to differ... look sharp! (Points to BB and Charity's cousin, sitting in the conference room, alone)
BB: I can imagine how this is for you. You... well, mentioning how I felt about Charity won't help much, but you know the deal.
CC: My heart has broken in too many places. Charity was my favorite relative. She came to Baltimore more often than I came here, but I was always glad to be around her. Sure she was miserable, but I loved her anyway! In fact, her misery was part of why I liked her so much... she was quiet, but not TOO quiet... (A tear streams down her cheek)
BB: Hey, if it helps, I'll be quiet and miserable for the both of us.
Charity: Ah, same ol' Bourgeois... glad to see THAT...
CC: You're sweet, BB. Thank you.
(Charity watches lovingly as her cousin flings her arms around BB. Then comes a pause... a long stare. Charity watches, intrigued)
CC: You know, you're really cute in those glasses.
BB: I.. I, uh, well they...
(Charity's cousin wastes no time. She tosses her hair back, pulls Bourgeois to her, and lays a kiss dead smack on his lips... and it's one so passionate, that it could weld BB's glasses to his face...)
Charity: Oooh! That little...
R6: Jealous, Charity?
Charity: No! But I'm not happy.
R6: Why?
Charity: She just kissed him like that! How could she?
R6: She likes him... ever think of that?
Charity: Ah, put a cork in it!
R6: Tell that to THEM...
(Down below..)
BB: WOW!!!
CC: Runs in the family, like I said...
BB: You weren't lying! So.. uh... younever DID mention what your name was...
CC: (Whispers something in his ear) But don't tell anyone... Only Charity, and now, YOU know it...
BB: My lips are sealed!
(CC kisses him again)
CC: NOW they are, my love.
(Back above)
Charity: How beautiful... she must really love him, if she told him her first name.
R6: What IS it, anyway?
Charity: Sorry, classified information.
R6: No, that's Miss Info's brother. What's YOUR cousin's first name?
Charity: Her LAST name is Bazaar, and that's all you get.
R6: Well, despite it, I feel like spreading the happiness. And since we can't be seen by these guys...
(Charity and R6 give the camera a mischevious grin, and float away... TO BE CONTINUED)
By the way, that post where I posed as Lydia Karaoke, is just a warning of things to come. Pretty soon, you won't be able to trust ANYONE on this list anymore! (Evil laughter and thunderclap.)
Okay, this is a shameless self-promo for an upcoming interactive fic. Sue me!
As far as this story goes, though, I think I'd better refrain from comment until it is finished. Keep going!
...we needed some emotion. And the char's reactions are dead on, which is a big plus. BTW, I can't wait until you and Charity start doing something...
...this is a long fic. I like that, it means a lotta plot and detail's gone in, which is good. And I can't wait to see more of CC. I ain't saying her name out in public.
It just so happens that while I was interviewing Charity's cousin, I accidentally found out her name. I was gonna ask if I should maybe tell what it is, but now I dunno. Whadda ya think? As for the rest of it, Lydia took the news better than I thot she would. LB, I knew it was you; I figured it out thru a method I would think would be obvious, but I guess not. Toast waxing eloquent was impressive; reminded me of when Fetch quoted Keats in Pinky Histeria & the Brain. Olympic tongue wrestling? I'm not sure I wanna know. Info telling Karaoke she knew how she felt? Sorry, but that brings up a pet peeve of mine, no she doesn't! Has she lost Smartypants? No! So how could she know? Sorry. Maybe I'll just keep an eye on Froggo & Aka. Oh, & I won't tell my Road Rovers buddies about Fetch & Colleen; most of them have her with Hunter --- they even have kids in some fics --- except for this one guy who has his own collie char hooking up with her after Hunter dumps her, long story.
...since as I explaned, I had lots of problems trying to get to the Board yesterday. But at least I had something good to look forward to.
Comments on the other's comments
B.B: You like the fact it's long and emotional, as I do, sounds just like my work, long and emotional. And I too wonder what those two dead ones have up their invisable sleeves.
Nifnat: When did you interview the cousin and how? And I must wonder how you thought Lydia would take it, I wonder what could be a lot worse than running off and crying and screaming. Oh, and as for your comment on Miss Info's "know how you feel statement" I imagine she said that because of her grief over R6 and Charity going, but probably more so over Charity. I guess R6 will clear that up later.
The interview happened earlier; I just haven't posted it yet. It's in editing, would you believe? As to how, anything's possible in cyberspace. That thing about Lydia taking it better than I thot is an old comedic line used when someone goes postal. Speaking of going postal, sorry about going off there; like I said it's a pet peeve.
First of all, Breyer's ice cream has a new mint cookie & cream flavor that ROCKS!!!
Second, I will clear what I can...
Yes, Lydia nearly went postal... though it's more from going 0 for 2 in romance than over it just being me, but not MUCH more...
Miss Info knowing how Lydia feels... well, they've been best friends since age 4, so I imagine they kinda share each other's pain. Remember, Lydia knew Miss Info had been crying, despite her efforts to hide it. And I figure as happy-go-lucky as Miss Information is, crying isn't a common thing for her. And back in my first fic, she DID know exactly what was bothering her... though in the sense of losing a loved one to whatever, no Miss Information has NO IDEA... yet...
Long & Emotional... it's true, it's true... I wanted this one to be a comedy/drama mix, sorta something to show my darker/solemn/heartaching side... but not as deep as, say, the 24 series.
Nftnat interviewed Charity's Cousin??? Whoa, gotta hand it to ya, there! She rarely does interviews... BTW, I will reveal the elusive first name later in the story, but THAT won't be until tomorrow, at least. And after it's revealed, it will STILL be a CC/BB/Charity/(R6/Miss Info) secret, not told oficially to the remaining cast/board.
Well, so long for now, and have a Happy Thanksgiving!
This thread's getting lonely without it's creator, it wonders where he is and what's responsible for his going, work problems, computer problems, personal problems, whatever. It's sorry if it's nosy, it just doesn't want to end up desolute and unfinished and wonders if said creator will be back soon, hoping it doesn't lead to a repeat of the guy's last departure from here. And it also appears this thread has a nasty habit of taking other people's comments and making it it's own. It's also gonna end up in court for plagerizing certain comedy/drama writers comments here, hopefully the creator will come back soon to defend it.
(Charity and R6 had the idea that if they pulled a few pranks, it would bring up the spirits of the remaining H! cast/board members. Well, okay, it was more an R6 thing than a Charity thing, Charity actually found it to at first be cruel. But, there was one thing she'd always wanted to see...)
(Loud, as well as Aka, froggo, BB, CC, DD... HEY! Double D, wrong story, man!)
Edd: Uh, sorry. I was wondering if you could possibly help me out here. Y-you see, I was walking along the street, minding my own business, when Eddy comes along. He says he's got some scheme to make a few extra bucks, something about remodeling his basement into a haunted house and charging admission. Well, whatever that foolishness was, we were talking when, out of nowhere come those curse-dreaded Kanker sisters! Naturally, we ran for the hills, but I was somehow separated from Eddy, and got lost in this story.
Chit: Well, you can't very well stick around... We've got a part to write here, and YOU'RE not part of it! But, if you'll be quiet, you can hide in that cluster of kids over there, but NO funny business!
Edd: Thank you, oh thank you.
Chit: Now, on with the show!
(We NOW begin the story... oh wait, that was a few posts ago? Well, then we continue it... Sheesh, over-corrected and upstaged in my own story.)
Loud: Now, ladies and gentlemen... and Bourgeois, I will show you he proper way to entice a lady. Miss Information, if you would be so kind.
Miss Info: Of course.
(Behind Loud, Charity floats, watching. She's invisible, despite otherwise being in plain sight. A smile slowly creeps across her face, and she slips unnoticed into Loud's shadow.)
Loud: Now, observe closely. Miss Information, I have something I'd like to tell you.
Miss Info: And what may that be, honey?
Loud: All I want to say is... (Begins to sing and dance, though not intentionally) I'm a little teapot, short and stout!... (Stops dancing) HUH?! WHAT THE?!
(Everyone else is laughing uncontrollably)
BB: None too stout, but ya got the "short" part right, shrimpboat!
Loud: I-I-I dunno what happened?! What I meant to say was.. (loses control again) Miss Information, you are drop dead gorgeous, and I mean that as in if I don't get a goodnight kiss, I'll drop dead!
Miss Info: Loud, I... (Miss Information, despite being years older than Loud, and nowhere near single, still blushes a deep crimson.)
Froggo: Let me write that down... (To self, though Loud hears him) Make a total fool out of yourelf, hen add in cheap line to play for affection.
Aka: Hey, Froggy, you know you've got the walk of a male model? Especially after you pass me by!
Froggo: Aka, please... not now...
Aka: Sorry, just practicing Loud's lesson...
Loud: I didn't mean to ay that! Honest!
CC: I can see why you try to keep him and Charity apart... rather, why you TRIED to... This guy's off his stick!
BB: Okay, I could make a sick joke about that, but...
Loud: But you know Lydia would have your @$$ if you did.
BB: #@$% right!
(Charity has slipped out of her boyfriend's shadow, and rejoins R6, laughing all the way.)
R6: Wha? What was all that just now?
Charity: I always wanted have Loud prove his love for me by singing that, but I never got to ask him. So I figured what better time than when he can't even see me?
R6: Okay, but why the Miss Info... thing?
Charity: Well, YOU said he had some sort of crush on her after discovering her secret palace. I just clouded out his clear thoughts, not his emotions.
R6: Charity Bazaar, you are a SICK girl...
Charity: Beyond that, but then again, the same applies to you right now
R6: Funny... anyways, MY turn! Heh heh heh...
(Moments later, we see R6 turning up the thermostat in the studio... though only in a couple different rooms.)
R6: Ooh, this'll be great!
Charity: What are you up to.
R6: You'll see. To the security office!
(In the security office, Charity and R6 observe the TV monitors, particularly the screens for Lydia Karaoke's office and Miss Info's room. In the latter room, nothing seems to b happening before it hits R6.)
R6: CRAP! She must have gone into her palace to cool off!
Charity: Why do I have that feeling again?
R6: What, some sorta deja vu?
Charity: I'm not happy.
R6: This'll cheer you up.
(on the monitor, we see Lydia fanning herself. It's unbearably hot in her room, and the controls won't respond. So in desparation, she removes her trademark red jacket... still too scorched for comfort, she tosses the red skirt aside as well... her shirt follows... )
Charity: See, you're the sick one, not me.
R6: Ssssshhh! The good part's coming!
(Loud is seen walking past a camera, en route to the cafeteria. But he feels a sudden warmth when he passes Lydia's door. Fearing it may be a fire, he barges in, only to find Lydia Karaoke in nothing but her bra and panties... the former of which looked to be the NEXT thing to come off...
Loud: I'LL SAVE YOU!!! DON'T WORRY, Miss.... Miss Karaoke? GREAT CAESAR'S GHOST WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU?!
Lydia: OUT!!!
Loud: SHEESH, WHAT A GROUCH!!! I COME TO SAVE HER FROM WHAT I THINK IS A FIRE, AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?! WHAT'S WRONG, YOU MISS R6 THAT MUCH?!
(Suddenly, Lydia appears in front of this all)
Lydia: Alright, HOLD IT!!! The suggestive flirting with my best friend was one thing too many, but... THIS?! R6, I DEMAND that you put my clothes back on me, or this story's canned, buster!
R6: I'm not a blue rabbit.
Lydia: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! JUST GET MY CLOTHES BACK ON!!!!
R6: Funny, you usually scream louder for me to do the opposite.
Lydia: WHY YOU!.. I TOLD you I have a reputation to keep, and I-I'm not ready to give it up just yet!
R6: Not even for me..? (Makes a sad face)
Lydia: Well, maybe for you, but not just now. This will take some time. And besides... (turn around and notices something) HEY!!! That's my favorite blue thong! I TOLD you not to use that in the fics!
R6: Lydia, you're breaking...
Lydia: You're right...
R6: Howzabout I just cut to the chase...
Lydia: Idea well taken.
(Lydia exits, and the story fast forwards through the next few pranks. marshmallows fall out from under Miss Info's dress, BB drinks a bottle of hot sauce, Loud screams at JusSonic for not letting him fight his own battles with BB, and the two of them begin fighting. And BB and CC kiss... many a time.. Finally, alone in the green room, BB and CC share a moment.)
BB: You know, I'm beginning to grow rather fond of you... At first, I thought you were kinda strange for even liking me, but now, I see... more in you...
CC: Thanks, I think...
BB: what I mean to say, is.... Marissa Bazaar... I... love...
(Miss Info seems to pop out of nowhere)
Miss Info: There you two are!
CC: Ah! Uh, Miss Information, just how long were you...
Miss Info: Relax... Your secret's safe with me. Shoot, you've got such a similar name to mine, so I've nothing to laugh at you about.
(Above, Charity looks shocked, while R6 floats gloatingly)
R6: "Marissa", eh? Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiice name.
Charity: Yeah, yeah, that's her name. I'm not happy.
R6: Again?
Charity: She hates that name, and if YOU know it, it's no long time before...
R6: Relax, I won't tell.
Charity: I know you won't.
R6: Uh, sure... (R6 looks a bit nervous, and glances at the camera for support. Nothing there. Down below..)
CC: You know, I still miss her. And I miss R6 too, though I never knew him much. I'm sure Lydia Karaoke's a wreck. But still... I can almost feel them nearby. Charity and I were close, and I could always feel her absence and her presence.
BB: Yeah, I know what you mean. I can almost hear her. R6, too... It's almost s if they were still alive, but you saw the bodies. No WAY they survived that.
Charity: You'd be surprised, BB...
CC: It was awful. Well, I can't think much more of this... I only wish they'd made it in time... It's way too... apathy around here without them to add total zany melancholy to our lives.
R6: But I'm NOT dead! And if Chit cmes NEAR me in that snake headdress, he's gonna NEED those bandages!
Charity: Come on, let's go. I gotta think.
(They leave, and we later see the two of them in the studio library)
Charity: Look, it says here that if a character dies, but can return their detached ghost to their body before burial or creamation, they will come back to life, all wounds healed.
R6: Well, I guess it could work... only one problem... how to find our bodies? Only those close to the departed can communicate with the ghost, and we'd need them to find US so WE can get back to OUR paranormal lives.
Charity: But, none of them can even tell us apart from a memory. I-I-I wanna go back to being a tangible human girl again! (Charity begins to cry, R6 holds her and comforts her)
R6: There, there... I know how you feel. And I want to get back to life also.
Charity: But how?
R6: Grab your suitcase and a bottle of 2000 Flushes Blue, Charity. 'Cause we're invading some dreams tonight!
Well, I'm happy that I don't have to call in any lawyers to settle that last post of mine....oh, and glad you're back, I guess. I suppose you had a nice and busy holiday for yourself, it's always nice to spend time in the real world if for no other reason than to prove you know there still is one.
Marissa Bazaar, eh? Well, there's a much harder name to find a pun for, but since she hates it, it appears I won't get the chance to try.
Hmm, looks like you're taking a page out of an old fic of yours "I Dream of H!" to settle this one. At least they'll like your doing this a lot more than Chit or Sammy's invasion, quick, go to them and find out!
(Okay, it is the still of the night... yes, thank you, ladies and gentlemen.. and Bourgeois, Boyz II Men!)
(The group take their bows and exit the fic)
R6: One more creepy cameo, and I'll tear your vocal cords out!
R6: One, You're a ghost. Two, you're me.
R6: Get on with it, and stop the confusing self insertion!
R6: Why not say that to my undead face?!
R6: Oh Yeah?!
R6: Yeah!
(Before it can go further, Charity beaks up the fight, and drags the ghost of R6 into the story.)
Charity: Okay, we've got only ONE shot at this, since we have no idea when they plan to bury us. We'd best get this one right.
R6: Sure. I'll take on Lydia's dream, and you can enter...
Charity: Hold it. If you enter Lydia's head, it might alter the dream.
R6: To one of the moistened variety?
Charity: Eeeewww! I'm not touchin' that!
R6: Come on, I need to get into the head of someone that cares about me. Otherwise, it won't do much good.
Charity: Well, try thinking less along the lines of romance. For instance, I'm going to enter BB's dreams.
R6: Rethink that decision. For you, it'd be like looking through a hall of mirrors.
Charity: How about Loud?
R6: Do you plan to get an audible word in?
Charity: Froggo?
R6: Hmm. A likely bet, but he's with Aka now, so...
Charity: That's IT!!! I'll go into HER dreams!
R6: Not quite my idea of a suggestion, but it could work.
Charity: Oh, R6, don't be such a pessimist.
(R6 says nothing, but gives a look to the camera that says "This from miss "I'm Not Happy" herself")
R6: Oooookay.... Well, if I can't take Lydia's delectable dreams, then how about... uh... gee, I'm stumped.
Charity: Try thinking along the lines of someone you know would go screaming the news of your invasion of their slumbering psyche.
R6: Toast?
Charity: No, his psyche sleeps all day.
R6: Hmm.... I'VE GOT IT!!!
(A few minutes later, Charity silently slips into Aka's room. Aka is asleep and holding a stuffed Papa Smurf. Charity laughs lightly at this before entering her head)
(Inside Aka's dreams...)
(Aka Pella is walking down a street in Burbank. As she goes along, she passes a "hair factory", a shop filled with WB merchandise, and a Starbucks. She comes to a stop in front of a glass window. It is the Jolly Baker's place)
Aka: Betcha ol' Jolly boy even misses her...
(Aka turns around, but stops dead in her tracks. Standing before her is Charity Bazaar)
Aka: Charry! I thought you were... gone!
(Aka hugs Charity, but after about a second, she passs through her)
Charity: I am gone. But I am still here. In spirit. And I'm not happy.
Aka: Why?
Charity: You were all there when we were rushed to the ER. But in our time of need, we could not find you. Had R6 and I seen you at least once more, it may have saved our lives.
Aka: oh, I'm sorry! We tried to get in, but the specialists...
Charity: Would have fled after a full Histeria star treatment. It worked in Atlanta, didn't it? Oh, sure, I'm impaired and all, but with Big Fat Baby, you could have easily run them off.
Aka: Oh. W-well, I'll try to appease you. What I gotta do?
Charity: Visit us... once more, before the funeral. If they put us under, our spirits will never rest...
Aka: Y-you mean...
Charity: Visit us... Visit us...
(The dream ends, and Aka awakes in a cold sweat)
Aka: Whoa! I gotta tell Froggy about this!
(Meanwhile, in another room... R6 laughs and slips into someone's head... in the dream...)
(Sammy Melman is walking down Sunset Boulevard, happy as a clam. But he is stopped by a mysterious short figure.)
Sammy: Huh? Who's there?
Voice: Down HERE, you moron!
Sammy: Plotz? Hey, Plotzy, baby, what's going on?
Plotz: Your termination, that's what!
Sammy: I-I-I'm... fired?
Plotz: No, but you will be! Since YOU decided to call together a meeting, THIS guy (gestures to a bloodied, battered R6) had to take all the kids to L. A. And THAT'S when my protege perished!
Sammy: B-b-but but but...
Plotz: Yours will be kicked, that's a guarntee! You drag Father Time out of HIS ability to entertain the kids, drag R6 INTO it, and show up LATE for a meeting YOU SCHEDULED!!!
Sammy: W-w-well, what can I do? Some loser from Hollywood was cruising his limousine down the highway at about 20 miles an hour!
Plotz: Never mind THAT!! Go cover the scene! Get down to the hospital, and start to filming! I want a documentary on R6 right on my desk by Monday, or YOU'RE FIRED!!!
Sammy: Y-y-yes sir...
(Sammy Melman begins to leave)
Plotz: HOLD IT!!!
Sammy: Sir?
Plotz: Charity also died in that wreck, you know. So that's about another five years worth of money in the grave! And since YOU are responsible, All of the money we'd have made from newer episodes...
Sammy (Brightening): Yes sir...
Plotz: Is going to be diverted...
Sammy: YES SIR... (Looks ready to jump for joy)
Plotz: OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK!!!
Sammy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
(The dream ends. Moments later, Aka has gathered the Kid Chorus, and Sammy Melman has dressed and rallied Miss Information and the adults.)
Aka: She... spoke to me in a dream. Charity wants us to visit her.
Sammy: Well, that's great, not time to waste, if don't get you all down to the hospital PRONTO, I'm canned, so let's move out, shall we?
(Sammy begins herding the kids into his car. Above, the ghosts of Charity and R6 high-five)
R6/Charity: YES!!!
(About an hour later)
Doc: Sorry, but visiting hours are over.
Aka: They're just... well, they wouldn't mind us.
Doc: Nothing I can do, my hands are tied.
(Seconds later, the KC has made sure that more than just the good doctor's hands are tied...)
Aka: Now don't move. We'll only be a bit.
Doc: Third floor, room 12.
Smarty: Thank you, kind sir.
Loud: DON'T GET TOO ROPED UP IN YOUR WOEK!!!
Froggo: I warned you... a little wax and some scissors, and you'd be free right now!
(In room 312...)
Aka: Well, which one is it?
BB: I doubt they'd be together.
(Above, the two ghosts laugh at the irony.)
JS: Bourgeois is right...
BB: As always!
JS: ... they never bury corses together.
Robert: Hmm. I smell pizza steaks. R6 is definitely in here.
Nftnat: Perhaps you are correct. but we still don't know in which drawer.
LB: Hi-yo!! (He opens the nearest drawer) Heeeeeeeeeeere's... Bazaar!
Cho: Good work, Lucky Bob! You've uncovered Charity.
LB: Yes, now!
CC: My sweet cousin! I'm so glad to see you, especially since you haven't decomposed into a slimy green pulp!
BB: Ah... gotta love her (His face turns green, and he dashes into the bathroom)
Pepper: I bet he's in the top row! But none of us can reach that high!
Toast: Hmm.. 18, 109, 110, 111... HERE THE DUDE IS!!!
All others: Huh?
Toast: I just found him... Drawer number 112.
Pepper: How'd you do that?
Toast: They have the names of the bodies printed on the drawers.
(BFB rimshot)
(R6 is now exposed)
R6: Well, Charity... time to do this... After you..
Charity: Why, thank you...
(Charity descends back to her body, and begins to stir)
Aka: Huh? HEY!!!
Charity: W-where... am I?
Aka/Loud/BB/CC: SHE'S ALIVE!!!!
Charity: Hi folks!
Aka: Oh, you're alive! I'm so happy! But...
BB: But...
Robert: R6 is still...
Nftnat: I suppose one can't hope for too many miracles.
(R6 quickly dives into his body)
R6: Miracle THIS!
BB/JS/Nftnat/Robert: R6!!! You're alive!!!
R6: Last time I checked.
(The group anjoys a group hug. The next day...)
(R6's face is covered in red lip marks, courtesy of Lydia Karaoke. Charity is enjoying a pecan custard buffet. And all is well, except in one man's office. Sammy Melman holds a ticket stub from Larry's auto body.)
Melman getting his....Master Card would be proud of you. Well, every writer here should now be off your case for good now that the Great one{oh, and you, heh, almost forgot}is back among the living. Good thing you technically weren't around for any of the backlash. Chapter, um, 8 is now complete in your writing life, with no.6, Super H! Bros still undone, and I'm sure that now you're back to life, JusSonic will insist that your only co-written effort, Death Takes a Toll, be finished soon. Can't please some people....Get better, and I guess that now that your emotional fic is done{though admittingy a bit more of it could have been needed at the revival}it's back to screwball, censor chasing comedy, right?
now you are back on your toes (or it is feet?), can you submit a part for my "Death Takes A Toll" story? I mean, I am not pestering you or anything, but I really have to get it done. I promised you this will be the last part you will submitted for this fan-fiction.
Oh one more thing, is it all right that I borrowed Louis Richardson for a fan-fiction I am planning? (see 2 New villains topic for details) I mean you are not using him at the moment and I figured that I can use him.
Oh, good luck on your censor chasing. I am glad Charity is my favorite female H! character. (Oh don't freak out you guys! I like all the characters. snicker well, almost. [imagined Sammy being hit by an anvil and Chit falling through a trap-door])
The R6 agrees to write up more of "Death Takes a Toll"
R6: Why is someone narrating me as "The R6"?
Anyways, I have no problem on Louis Richardson being used... probably means I'll be involved in the plotline, and so would Lydia for that matter. I only needed him for one fic, after that, I retired him to another TV show... namely, well, let's just say he'll have a blast every day!
Edd: Thank you. It was my pleasure to remain here within the story. R6 does such a wonderful job with the Histeria cast, and it was nice of him to allow me to make a guest appearance. I can only hope to further brighten the world of the EH board, possibly by...
R6: Uh, Double D... the show is educational enough... Besides, you just needed a hiding place, remember. Speaking of which, this present for your girlfriends should help you three Eds in the near future.
Edd: MARIE KANKER IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!!!
R6: Sorry. Here, take this to her. They'll all love it!
(R6 hands over a large box to Double D)
Edd: But, what about...
R6: Move along now, or no more stories for you. And you know EXACTLY what I mean (Pokejed should catch this ref)
(Later, we find ourselves watching the Kanker sisters open up their new present. Inside, something moves. Marie pulls it out)
Sammy: Hey, how did I get here? Where IS here? Blast that R6, he always pulls these sick pranks!
(Sammy notices the Kankers grinning at him)
Sammy: Oh, hello. Could one of you ladies please tell me where... (The sisters advance, evil grins on their faces.) Uh-oh...
(Moments later, Sammy Melman is wearing a dress. A red one, with purple high heels. And he's doing various chores for the Kanker sisters.)
To Be Continued)
