So Mikey Molester is back in the news and I have a few jokes about him.

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Q: What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
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A: Neil Armstrong Walked on the moon...and Michael Jackson screws little boys!
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Q: How do you know it's midnight at the Neverland Ranch?

A: When the big hand touches the little hand
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Q: What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?

A: One is artifically dyed white, made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with...and the other holds groceries.
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Ah...strange man...but remember when he was black and his songs were actually cool?

No, neither do I but I've seen some of the music videos, they're not bad. Now he's not ever a person.

And why do you think he called it the Neverland Ranch?
Could it be so the little boys there will never grow up?

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If you break a crumb in half you have two crumbs, not two half-crumbs. Doesn't this violate some law of physics?

Ooh, found some more


WARNING: some of these are not entirely appropriate for younger or sensitive viewers :P
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Did you hear that Michael Jackson had a baby boy last week?
Yup, it's true ... and the week before that he had a 12 year old boy.
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Michael Jackson had a boy. He also became a father!
He asked his wife's doctor how soon after the birth could he have sex.
The doctor told him he should wait until the kid is at least 12 or 13 years old.
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Michael Jackson went to church and confessed "Forgive me father, for I have sinned with young boys". The priest replied "It's OK, I have done it also."

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--
If you break a crumb in half you have two crumbs, not two half-crumbs. Doesn't this violate some law of physics?

And some more: ooh there are some REALLY good ones out there:


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Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson marrying Lisa-Marie Presley?
A: If Elvis were really dead, he'd turn over in his grave.

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Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A: From a catalogue.

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Michael Jackson was on a ship with 100 boy scouts when it hit an iceberg and started to sink.
The captain announced "We're sinking! Everyone abandon ship!"
Michael asked, "What about the children?"
The captain replied, "F*** the children!"
Michael looked around eagerly and asked "Do we have time?"
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Michael said to Janet one night, "I fancy some entertainment, what shall we do?"
To which Janet replied "I know we'll get a video."
Michael then said "Great, I'll get Aladdin."
Janet said speedily "No Michael, You have been in trouble for that before."

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If you break a crumb in half you have two crumbs, not two half-crumbs. Doesn't this violate some law of physics?

Funny jokes.

I wish that he were just a musician instead of a 'celebrity' then he'd turn out stuff like Billie Jean, Thriller and Smooth Criminal regularly.

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This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, My only friend, the end
It hurts to set you free
But you'll never follow me

The end of laughter and soft lies
The end of nights we tried to die
This is the end

- The Doors - The End

RIP Jim Morrison

Those jokes, as you call them, aren't at all funny - they're disgusting. I seriously don't know how anyone could interpret such heinous things as being comedic, Pinchy, because that's what a joke is meant to be. It seems rather strange that they'd be on a Harry Potter message board, aswell...

Michael Jackson does turn out 'stuff' as great as Billie Jean regularly, Kitch - ask any of his fans (not that it's the same as Billie Jean, of course, but its quality is just as good, if not better). Remember that Billie Jean, Smooth Criminal and Thriller were all made before those first 'molestation allegations'. After that, his music hasn't been eulogised like it would if it were by any other artist. Just listen to 'Remember the Time' or 'You Rock My World' - they're amazing.

Pinchy, don't go saying I'm sensitive and therefore shouldn't have read them. I'm not sensitive. But I don't think jokes of such a nature are at all funny. I'd rather not start a Michael Jackson debate, either...that was never my intent. I just felt like voicing my opinion on this.

Come on guys - They werent ALL funny Pinchy, but some of them made me giggle! They're just jokes and although in poor taste, that's how our current society functions - we deal with problems by poking fun, or making stupid/crude jokes at and about them. I've heard worse jokes, and sure I like some of MJ's music - but the recent crap that he's released is not his standard! After "Dangerous", everything just flopped!

Personally, I dont believe that MJ is guilty of molesting children, simply because he is too much of a child himself. I do think that there is something psychologically wrong with him but I truly dont think he molests children - he just leaves himself well open to scandal!








"Now Now Draco... Play nicely"
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Yeah sure, Remember the Time and Keep the Faith were as good as Thriller and Billie Jean, whatever you say dude.

Not that they were bad or anything.

I am just making the point that if he concentrated on his music more, maybe it'd be better - I didn't say it was bad at all. Maybe you should read what I say before you critisise it.

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This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, My only friend, the end
It hurts to set you free
But you'll never follow me

The end of laughter and soft lies
The end of nights we tried to die
This is the end

- The Doors - The End

RIP Jim Morrison

Yes, well, all music has to evolve or it'd die out. Billie Jean is a classic because there is nothing like it. If Michael Jackson made another Billie Jean, no one would like it because it's already been done. And, yes, 'Keep the Faith' is great.

Oh, I did read what you said, dude. Maybe you should've done me that favour also, and you'd realise I wasn't criticising what you had to say at all.

Okay, before anyone opts for an all-out fight, let me remind everyone of the guidelines in the advice for new folks.  Everyone give it a read and then calm down, okay?

blows everyone some sloppy kisses and departs

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Please read and review!
http://www.schnoogle.com/authorLinks/Sandy_Phoenix
http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=1461584

*thinks that those sloppy kisses would mean more, if she turned out another chapter in her fan fic...

I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning - very very frightening me
Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo Figaro - magnifico
-Queen

While the jokes may have been a bit crude... I don't think Michael Jackson deserves any respect for what he has done. WOW, he's a good artist. OJ Simpson was a good athlete. Does that mean that they should be immune to our thoughts?

It's sick what that man has done. Anyone can say that he wouldn't do it, truth is - he's admitted to going to bed with the children... "it's all innocent" - well, in his strange mind perhaps it IS innocent! Perhaps in Charles Manson's mind what HE was doing was all innocent...

The fact is, it is NOT OK for a man to get into bed with children. It is NOT OK to hold an 18 month old baby over the rails of a 3 story building.

Now, while the children have often claimed that he didn't do it - that is a VERY normal response to sexual abuse. They have this feeling of adrenaline knowing that they are doing something wrong, they're scared - yet they adore the person and don't want him to stop talking to them, or not carry out his promises. Don't believe me? Ever hear of Graham James? The hockey coach? Look what he did to Sheldon Kennedy - who kept very quiet for years. Hell, it's likely he did the same to Theoren Fluery - the drug abuse and erratic behivior spells child victim all over it - yet he denied it. Why? James brought him into the NHL. He is male, it's embarrassing for them more for women. (no one can come down on me for this, it's true.)

So, since there's nothing anyone can do about Wacko Jacko - the shock and horror of what he has done is too much - people have to make jokes in order to deal with it.

I didn't say Keep the Faith was bad, you seem to have not read what I said again.

And I said songs as good as Billie Jean - not exactly the same as.

---

This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, Beautiful friend
This is the end, My only friend, the end
It hurts to set you free
But you'll never follow me

The end of laughter and soft lies
The end of nights we tried to die
This is the end

- The Doors - The End

RIP Jim Morrison

I'd like to apologize to those who were offended by the Michael Jackson jokes. I don't think I should have to apologize for putting them there, but I will apologize for those who were offended by them. And to anyone who found them funny, you're as sick as I am

(Sandy, what was that you said about the guidelines? Did I break some of them with the jokes?)

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If you break a crumb in half you have two crumbs, not two half-crumbs. Doesn't this violate some law of physics?

Hehe. I am with some of the peeps here. I believe MJ deserves all the ribbing he can get, and though it is sick humour, it is also amusing. I think sandy just doesnt want a board war, i agree. She is wise. Now for the second time on this thread i am going to demand her finish another chapter in he FF. I encourage all others to do so also. In fact if you do i will pay you.

I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning - very very frightening me
Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo, Gallileo,
Gallileo Figaro - magnifico
-Queen

No, Pinchy.  You didn't mess up.  I was just suggesting that people remember that differing opinions should be discussed respectfully as much as possible.  We weren't at fight level yet, and I was hoping to keep it that way.

Sheesh, Locke!  I am working on chapter 10 even now.  It is about half finished and should go to Moriah to beta (Hail, Almighty Beta) later this week.  I try to keep to the schedule (as much as I can) posted on my website.  Narc is MUCH faster at updating than I, so watch for The Mark of Death. 

 

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Please read and review!
http://www.schnoogle.com/authorLinks/Sandy_Phoenix
http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=1461584

Due to nasty viruses and major changes made to my comp, chaper 15 will be delayed a few more days. :0 I'm annoyed as hell, I keep finding spyware and viruses and the likes throughout all my files. I'm ready to kill.

I downloaded spybot search and destroy for my spyware problem- it found plenty, but it still hasn't been able to fix my everchanging homepage. I keep getting porn ads and offers- no matter how many times I change it back to yahoo. Any ideas, from anyone?

Kitch, I didn't say you said Keep the Faith was bad. All I said was that it's great.

Yes, I know what you meant about Billie Jean. Perhaps you didn't understand my comment, so I'll rephrase: Billie Jean is a song on its own, as are all of his songs. Therefore, You Rock My World or Keep the Faith can't be as good as Billie Jean (or Billie Jean as good as them) because they each have a special individuality.
I don't think it's fair to compare his songs, because some people like his older music more, and others prefer his recent music. Automatically that poses a contradiction. It just depends on what everyone personally likes.

The only one that was truly funny, IMHO, was the MJ vs. plastic bag joke. ROFL!!!

Well I agree that some of them were completely stupid, but the majority of them were very funny. I agree with [whoever just posted(CJ?), i can't be bothered to press the back button to check] that the gorcery bad one was hillarious.

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AIM: rlyjcksn2
MSN: riley@internet.look.ca


What's wrong with this picture?

LMAO! Those were soooo funny! I didn't get the Aladin one, though. scratches head

Aladin being a person. Not the movie.

Ahhhh...yes, that does make a little more sense...


~Quidditch Queen~