One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you've got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn't your biggest problem.
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It really wasn't my fault what happened at Alex's Christmas party. It was John who spiked the punch with too much Tequila. I can't help it if I drank 45 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like BO.
I thought it was funny when I put Frank's Pants on my head and danced the Hokey Pokey on the Couch while singing `Clocks'. I didn't mean to break Alex's Cd Player and don't know why Alex would sue me for Murder.
I don't remember calling Joe's wife a stupid Cow---even though she looked like one with orange eye shadow and blue lipstick!
And when I threw up on Jane's husband's Arm, it was only because I ate too much of that Pizza.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my BMW through my neighbor's Attic. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a stinky dog and have me arrested for Theft!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all strong and weak. And I'm really not to blame for any of this happy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and kick yours, Riley (Really a nice Boy!)
That was hilarious!!! here is what mine came out!!
Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at silvia's Christmas party. It was paola who spiked the punch with too much whiskey. I can't help it if I drank 23 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like orange.
I thought it was funny when I put Stefy's sock on my head and danced the samba on the chair while singing 'We Wish You A Merry Xmas". I didn't mean to break silvia's microwave and don't know why silvia would sue me for theft.
I don't remember calling Andre's wife a hilarious duck---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and fuchsia lipstick!
And when I threw up on Monny's husband's belly, it was only because I ate too much of that fries.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my bicycle through my neighbor's attic. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a smelly lion and have me arrested for murder!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all short and boring. And I'm really not to blame for any of this tall stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and violently yours,
Gemy (Really a nice girl!)
P.S. It's only 2000000000 bucks!
D.B.N.G.T.M.
Sirius i luv you
Bellatrix DEAD!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They run off eckeltricity, do they?" said
Mr. Weasley knowledgeably. "Ah yes, I can
see the plugs. I collect plugs," he added to
Uncle Vernon."And batteries. Got a very
large collection of batteries. My wife
thinks I'm mad, but there you are."
-GoF-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Quotes:
"It is our choices that make us who we are. Not our abilities."- Albus Dumbledore
"There is no excuse for looking down on someone, unless you're helping them up."- Rev. Jesse Jackson
“Whatever you are looking for is in you (the rest is still in the fridge)” Comix
"Just remember: If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off." Jewels of Wisdom
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well i don't know about your car but mine is a flying bike just like the one from the movie E.T., so I had no problem flying through the attic!! lol
Anyway, I tried another one... whaddaya think?
Dear Santa,
I have been a good wizard.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Harry's Christmas party. It was Peter who spiked the punch with too much firewhiskey. I can't help it if I drank 74 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like blood.
I thought it was funny when I put James's robe on my head and danced the twist on the four poster while singing `the Hogwarts song'. I didn't mean to break Harry's wand and don't know why Harry would sue me for murder.
I don't remember calling Dumbledore's wife a fat flobberworm---even though she looked like one with brownish eye shadow and gray lipstick!
And when I threw up on Narcissa's husband's hair, it was only because I ate too much of that pudding.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my broomstick through my neighbor's window. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a scary blast-ended screwt and have me arrested for murdering his wife!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all joyful and happy, because they wont keep me here!! Harry, you're mine!!. And I'm really not to blame for any of this bright stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and evilly yours,
Lord Voldemort (Really a nice wizard!)
P.S. It's only 10 bucks!
D.B.N.G.T.M.
Sirius i luv you
Bellatrix DEAD!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They run off eckeltricity, do they?" said
Mr. Weasley knowledgeably. "Ah yes, I can
see the plugs. I collect plugs," he added to
Uncle Vernon."And batteries. Got a very
large collection of batteries. My wife
thinks I'm mad, but there you are."
-GoF-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Quotes:
"It is our choices that make us who we are. Not our abilities."- Albus Dumbledore
"There is no excuse for looking down on someone, unless you're helping them up."- Rev. Jesse Jackson
“Whatever you are looking for is in you (the rest is still in the fridge)” Comix
"Just remember: If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off." Jewels of Wisdom
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I didn't read any of the responces to this thread because I want to see for myself what the link is.
Problem being, the link doesn't work. It brings me to a white page that says this:
Your email message has been idle and this link has become inactive. To access the link, close this window and return to your MSN Hotmail Message. Then click the browser's Refresh button or close your message and reopen it.
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That happened to me too, Chris. Is your homepage MSN? Mine is, so all I had to do was on the MSN page and click "Refresh"; then I pasted the link and it worked for me!
Try adn tell me if it works, ok?
D.B.N.G.T.M.
Sirius i luv you
Bellatrix DEAD!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They run off eckeltricity, do they?" said
Mr. Weasley knowledgeably. "Ah yes, I can
see the plugs. I collect plugs," he added to
Uncle Vernon."And batteries. Got a very
large collection of batteries. My wife
thinks I'm mad, but there you are."
-GoF-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Quotes:
"It is our choices that make us who we are. Not our abilities."- Albus Dumbledore
"There is no excuse for looking down on someone, unless you're helping them up."- Rev. Jesse Jackson
“Whatever you are looking for is in you (the rest is still in the fridge)” Comix
"Just remember: If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off." Jewels of Wisdom
Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts.
Here's my letter to Santa, (my own format, though)
Dear Santa,
Why do I never get a present?
Is it because I'm Jewish? Because according to the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, that's discrimination. I'll sue you for everything you've got, the elves, the reindeer, and especially that outfit. It's hideous. With the extra weight you have from all the cookies, you look like an large, overripe tomato. That being said, either get me a large, shiny new car or I'll slap you with a lawsuit and we can settle this on Judge Judy.
Merry Christmas,
Pinchy
--
If you break a crumb in half you have two crumbs, not two half-crumbs. Doesn't this violate some law of physics?
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Well since chris is obviosly pretty computer iliterate i'll explain it. The link she pasted is a link from her e-mail account(don't know how that happened) So just copy and paste the actual address.
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It really wasn't my fault what happened at Chris's Christmas party. It was lilmissmalfoy who spiked the punch with too much Firewiskey. I can't help it if I drank 12 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like horse urin.
I thought it was funny when I put Sandy's Jumper on my head and danced the Waltz on the Sofa while singing `I Like Big Butts'. I didn't mean to break Chris's Stereo and don't know why Chris would sue me for Indecent Exposure.
I don't remember calling Kitch's wife a wasted dog---even though she looked like one with maroon eye shadow and scarlet lipstick!
And when I threw up on Narcissa's husband's Bosom, it was only because I ate too much of that triacle tart.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Ford Anglia through my neighbor's garden. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a drunken skunk and have me arrested for drunkedness!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all stinky and disgusting. And I'm really not to blame for any of this freaking stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and not so yours,
Locke (Really a nice boy!)
P.S. It's only negative 10 bucks!
"Make way for the Heir of Slytherin, seriously evil wizard coming through. . ."-Fred and George(CoS)
