I know some people are confused, especially if they didn't see Kitch's post. I know I'm confused. From the emails I've been getting, though, I think I have enough information to clarify what Narcissa meant in her 'clarifying a few things' post. I don't care if no one wants my side. If they saw Kitch's post, they might think that's all there is to it. So be it. But if you want my sentiments on the matter, I'll just repost the email I sent Sandy:
I'm going to basically just say what I told Jennifer:
My board is pretty much a live journal that is closed to all but a few people. I refer to my board a bit om the HP board because it was the original HP board, until we moved it and reshaped it to its current state.
Susan did not forget the addy. She might have, but she did give it to Kitch, as we've suspected him on our board long before this.
But as for my board- I will not deny anything I posted on it, because they were my true feelings at ONE MOMENT in time. It's just like an MSN convo or chat room convo. Remember how the mods used to go into a chat room and bitch about certain members that we felt were pissing us off at a single moment in time? It doesn't mean we disliked them or thought our sentiments would be more than fleeting. I don't have MSN. I don't have IM anymore. Even when I did, I hardly was ever on my computer to use it. That board is where I take my immediate sentiments and instantly place it onto the board. I don't go back and delete it once those feelings have passed. This is a message board. Everyone there knows that those feelings are not permanent. I prove this time and time again when I have shown a clear change in sentiment on that board member.
However, you would not get that with the selective choices Kitch posted. As I said, we think he has been there for a while. It seems he has been methodically reading every one of our posts, choosing out the absolute worst, and then posting those, knowing no one will take the time to scour the entire board to get the complete picture. It is a VERY skewed view, but the posts he displayed are accurate of the emotion I felt at that single moment. I was extremely pissed off when Narcissa gave back the HP board to Dakota. I had just been the worst one in bashing him, so now I looked stupid, and I also knew that Dakota often took long unexplained absences from the board, and that was NOT about to stop (and it hasn't). So I ranted quite heatedly about her. I remained pissed off at Narcissa for probably a couple of weeks. Then I cooled down. But you won't find Kitch posting any posts where I said anything friendly about Narcissa after that...only that one post where I went off over a year ago. He knows no one is about to read a couple of years worth of posts to get the complete picture, nor would I probably if I saw a thousand posts in front of me without any idea where to start my search. Hell, I can't remember everything I've said this past month, and wouldn't be able to selectively find the positive posts. It simply would take too much time...time Kitch apparently had to waste just to find the purely negative ones.
Imagine if every single MSN conversation you EVER had was open to everyone present on the board. Imagine if every chat room, IM, and MSN conversation was open right for everyone to see. Now imagine that the person making those conversations public only highlighted the portions where you were angry at another board member, knowing that people would only read the highlighted sections and not the complete story. I think you'd be rather appalled, because what you thought during those conversations isn't necessarily what you feel right now. In fact, that rarely is the case. I'm POSITIVE MANY horrible things have been said about me in those conversations, mostly because I've had people send me such samplings periodically, just as I'm sure many of you have been bashed in those conversations. It doesn't mean that you're currently fighting or you currently don't like someone. It just means that a while back, you did have a serious problem with that person and vented about it. That's why I've never taken the convos I've received seriously, because I know the person making the statement about me probably won't permanently feel like that forever. I piss people off, just as people piss me off. It's common sense.
Well, that board is my MSN conversation. It's where I go to talk to a group of people I've known forever. If you scoured that board, you'd find that the HP board RARELY comes up. It's almost all just politics, and on the mention of the HP board, it's not all bad. It's just that Kitch's post made it selectively look completely negative. But yes, when I have a current problem with a board member that I am frustrated with, I vent there. It is where my outrage occurs. It's just like many of you who go on to MSN to do the same thing. It has nothing to do with my current sentiment.
So yes, what I posted on that board were my sentiments at one point, just as many of you have bashed other board members in conversations. The only difference here is that now my OLD sentiments are publicized to the people that I made them about, even if I no longer feel that way.
We will delete the board. It wasn't made by an intense search. It was made when Sue gave the addy to Kitch. We simply want to be a place where we can make a conversation and not have that used against us as evidence of a constant hate that actually no longer exists, just because it was written in the heat of passion at one point in the past.
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Point taken. Susan wanted to make trouble and that she did.
I might like to add just for the record - because obviously she's reading here, in fact I don't doubt now that SHE was the "Angel" who posted the other day:
We didn't "hack". As it shows in my explanation - everything I did was perfectly legal. I applied for a free email account. Telling Helen that the FBI (LMAO!) would care over something as petty as this when people are hacking actual bank accounts - please!
Yep. What I did put on my post, as I told Jennifer, was actually quite illogical when it came to the board hacking. I was FURIOUS with Narcissa at the time. Anyone ever been so mad with someone that they just spout off whatever comes to their mind? That's what I did. I was extremely angry. I admit that. I didn't actually go back to read the post because I couldn't care less about what I felt a year ago, but I do remember that when the board was taken over and then given back to Dakota, I had VERY strong emotions about it and said whatever I could think about.
And then I cooled back down...
As I told Kitch at my board, I do find it rather odd that he says my board is nothing but a bunch of lies and randomly spouts of names that I apparently bashed...but I don't remember saying anything bad about (well, not all. I admittedly have said some very bad things about Locke there. Please forgive me). However, he only could single out a one time event for people to read...an event that occurred well over a year ago...as if I am so static that what I thought over a year ago about an event that pissed me off would be my current feelings today.
Also, I think he had Susan should have tried to get their stories straight. Susan put up this detailed explanation about how she tried to find my board again, yet Kitch claims he just randomly stumbled upon it at the same time Susan did and instantly found those negative posts from so long ago. It doesn't make sense.
Oh well. We're gone from that location. Just like you'd secure your MSN conversations if you found they were being posted everywhere, we're going to secure that board since it is not just me who goes there.
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"Anyone ever been so mad with someone that they just spout off whatever comes to their mind?"
One word: Jassmine.
Basically I don't want to have a huge arguement because that was obviously the goal there, and I for one don't like to be used as a chess piece.
Another thing - Ginny - mind your own damn busines for once, will you? I'm going to say this slowly. THis... has... nothing... to... do... with... you.
I got the point narc in ya im, ya didn't need to post it here too. "Dumber than Dirt says: You have GOT to mind your own ****ing business!" That was clear enough, rude but point given
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I feel the need to apologize. I got pretty angry at you Helen, but then I was already a bit bugged by you at the moment. I can't say that I've never just spewed angry comments when I was pissed. I understand.
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits
"Remember the enemy's gate is down"- Ender's Game
"DONKEY: Quick say something crazy. . . say your wearing ladies underwear
PINOCCIO: Im wearing ladie's underwear?
SHREK: Wait are you?
PINOCCIO: No (nose grooooooooooows)
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I know I don't belong here or anything (I was one of the original board members but that is besides the point), but I see both sides of the story. Our board, Helen's Board, is just our way of unwinding. I go there to get away from problems at home. And Even though I post very rarely, I'm always lurking. I don't remember Helen saying anything bad about you, Narcissa. Not since I came back after a long hiatus(which ended last summer).
Now, I wouldn't normally step in if this somehow didn't involve me. And It does involve me, because I am a member of that board. And the whole board should not have been attacked like that. I'm not blaming that on you. I'm not blaming that on anyone. I'm just saying that you guys should have taken a look at a lot more posts then just the ones where helen was letting off steam.
Those are just my thoughts. This was not meant to be offensive to anyone so please don't take it that way.
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Ok. For a start I found the board through Susan's post on that Ezboard, don't go thinking she's been telling me what to do and say, I've never even spoken to her off this board. Secondly, I showed Narcissa what Helen had been saying because I thought she had a right to know, whether it was a year ago or not. I know I would want to hear what people had been saying about me behind my back.
Don't act as if Susan gave me the link and then told me to go spam it. I didn't even post on the damn thing until someone called 'Sabethea' made a comment about me.
We Will Win Euro 2004. Come On England.
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Which is how we knew you were lurking. I didn't say you were under commands of Susan, but that she directed you to the board. And I know you say PLENTY of things behind my back in various convos. I also know what some other board members said behind my back at the I HATE HELEN board since Mari gave me her password in. So don't act like you're this righteous crusader on the path to expose all injustice. You just hate me and want to take any blow you can. It isn't a "right to know". If it were, you would be showing people nasty things I say the moment I say them...not searching desperately for something to pull out and only finding a heated rant from A LONG TIME ago (not just a year- well over a year). I don't care that Narcissa saw that. I was pissed off at her that long ago. I was royally pissed off. I'm not anymore. I haven't been since about two weeks after that discussion. If she wants to know how I felt about her for 2 weeks that long ago, fine.
But this wasn't you trying to be the good guy. You're just a guy with a grudge. Don't make it out to be anymore than it is.
If people still have hard feelings about how I felt about them 2 years ago, 1 year ago, 8 month ago...I'm sorry. I don't feel the same way about it now as I did then. Let's be honest, I get into a lot of arguments on this board. When I do, I typically get angry and I rant off on my board my immediate frustrations that I won't vocalize here. That board is my email, my MSN, my chatroom, and my IM equivalent.
But that's just a really small part of what that board is. That entire board is pretty much just one political discussion. If you want to know how I feel about the current Catholic Bishops conference, or how I feel about Kobe Bryant, or my true sentiments on Bush and Kerry...that's a good place to find that out at. If you want to know exactly how I feel about Samantha, or Chris, or GwP, or any board member...not exactly a great place to go seeing how I very rarely talk about this board there.
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Helen, FYI -- I did find your (old) board in about two minutes. So it wasn't really miraculously hidden. I just typed in your name to AOL search.
Anyway, I wanted to see what all this was about so I looked. I found two posts that were rude on your behalf. But as you've defended yourself they're understandable. But I looked at the board for awhile (er- it's summer, no school, leave me alone lol) I didn't comb every post I just looked at the titles. I went back seriously like a year... because it was talk about the release of OotP i think, and that was exactly one year ago today.
So there ya go. In a year I found two posts. I'd say it isn't exactly a bash board. More like a politics/current events board?
Sorry for being nosy, though..
------------------- "if you let them make you; they'll make you
paper mache; at a distance you're strong; until
the wind comes; then you crumble and blow away"
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We talk pretty much exclusively about current political issues, since we're all into politics and that is the thing that riles most of us up.
Yeah, as I mentioned in one of those two posts- it had been a LONG time since I was in a fight on this board. I ONLY rant about people here when I'm in a fight with them. Hence, if I'm not in a fight here, no one is getting torn apart by my personal sentiments over there. And seeing how it's been about a year since I have actually been on a fight here, you're not going to find all that many words about this board here in a negative way.
Although, as I said, we suddenly got a couple HP posts there, which was REALLY weird. If you look at the posts there, it's not exactly an HP discussion area.
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No, I think you might find that the link I found to your board led me to the post in which you and your ickle buddies stated that Narcissa "deserves to die".
And, no, I didn't show her what you've said because I don't like you, I would have let her know even if it was someone that I do like.
We Will Win Euro 2004. Come On England.
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I highly doubt that. You just like to make yourself sound noble. Let's cut the "it's right" crap. Your own hate led you to search out that post from well over a year ago. I don't care that you hate me. Just hate me honestly and don't try to find excuses for your actions.
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I do have a few things to ask though - I realize you were venting and all, but some of the things you said there have had me thinking that I must be insane as I remember things differently. I generally never made any formal decision without getting all of your opinions on it - right?
And when did I ever threaten to delete you from the board? We never even knew how to do that until Dakota came back and the thought never had crossed my mind, so I don’t even know where you would have gotten that absurd idea. I think of all things, I asked for your opinions more than anyone else’s on how to deal with certain situations.
And can you quote me for saying I’d have the last say over the other mod’s? Ever?
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You doubt that the link led me straight to that post? Ok, I'll copy the poste that Susan, posting as 'Helen Wulfgar', left on some random board that I found.
Helen Wulfgar
Unregistered User
(5/27/04 5:24 pm)
Reply And here is what I think of Narcissa
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But I didn't have the guts to tell her to her face.
Helen Wulfgar
Unregistered User
(5/27/04 5:26 pm)
Reply try again
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www.network54.com/Forum/t...1042430675
We Will Win Euro 2004. Come On England.
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She should be in her 40s now. She was 38 when she first went to our board, I believe.
And Kitch, you're not going to convince anyone that you did this nobly. As you said in Narcissa's post, you were filled with glee that people hated me. It seemed to be your only intent- get people to hate me.
What you don't seem to realize is that this is the internet, not my real life. I really don't care WHO hates me or who likes me. It's not going to affect my life in the end seeing how I'm on the internet for all of 15 minutes on weekdays and rarely ever on during the weekend. That 15 minutes really doesn't run my life, sorry to say.
Narc, I never actually read the post that Kitch linked you to. The members on my board have a lot of personal things on there, so they asked me to delete the board when we moved. It was a group decision there since, gasp, I'm not the only one who uses that board and exposing their innermost thoughts to a bunch of strangers didn't seem to appeal to many of the remaining board members. For that, I can't go back and read what I said either. I simply don't remember it. I'm so busy that I don't remember what I did last month anymore, let alone what I wrote years ago on a whim. Even if I did still have that post, I wouldn't be able to remember why I wrote it completely or what I was thinking at the time. I simply forgot about it a couple of weeks later. So I'm afraid that I won't be able to really answer anything about what I wrote unless you talk about a post I made in the past three weeks.
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But just to clarify- From seeing everyone's reference to it, and seeing a short glimpse from the link you sent me, I do remember that I was pissed off. That is the one and only thing I can remember that was going through my head at the time. I was pissed off. I didn't actually see what I wrote. I don't know one thing I actually said back then. Even if I saw specific lines, I won't remember it. I can only tell you my feeling at the time, not what anything meant.
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:O OMG! You were pissed off when you said Narcissa deserved to die?? Oh God I wouldn't have ever thought that. Infact that is the complete opposite of what I was thinking. I was picturing a Happy Helen Bunny sitting at her computer with some flowers and chocolates thinking "Ah, I'm so happy today. Maybe I'll tell my internet friends that Narcissa deserves to die."
Sorry, so sarcastic today it's unbelievable.
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