I think we all need a laugh so here (this is off mugglenet.com and you guys have probably read them but I think its worth posting...)
Over the years we've gotten some pretty stupid emails from people, and we even saved some of them for you to laugh at. Emerson made this page, so those are his immature comments at the bottom of the messages. Some of the messages are edited for language.
whY don/t u do us all a favor and die cuase hary potter is gay.go smoke some floo powder u friggin fairy.
Reading things like this I begin to lose faith in the human race.
HOw DARE you compare one of the best pieces of litature to a little kids movie, and devote a whole website to it? ok there may be some things alike between the lord of the rings and harry potter but thats because the writers of harry potter ripped some things off. the lord of the rings isn\'t just a fantasy it also has meaning and depth too, unlike the kiddie movie harry potter. i mean come what the hell is your problem? honsetly all that harry potter is a piece of crap that is a lord the rings rip off. so i must request that you take down this site and maybe actuly look for the meaning behind the lord of the rings and not just the stuff that appels to little kids.
I think the more pressing question: is the moon really made of cheese? I believe the supporting evidence is incontrovertible. Send me your thoughts.
Dear J.K. Rowling,
I have a very important question! Now you may not want to hear this ..but I really would like if you would send me an email back with the answers to the question I\'m about to ask you. Now , for the questions , What made you want to write about satanic things? What do you have against the Christians ? Why are you making these books to try to turn everyone away from God?!?! Why\'d you make the Christians the bad people? Why do you want your books to be about evil!?! Thank you for your time .. and please email me back
I suppose actually reading the books would be out of the question...
Hello Muscle palace Rupert's mail address it appears not to be being positively. nya The inside inside the cotton 3 all helped the mail does not see anh ass why .... And reply it entrusts certainly . I language ardency maybe too much without ? It peels anyhow and phyey the use method petty egg it lights and it gives. Only is like thatGoodbye
Lather, rinse and repeat. Got it.
hey emerson!!!!! HOW DARE YOU compare this stupid movie with jrr tolkiens epic masterpiece?????? you suck the movie of harry potter is a disgrace! it has no point and no feeling behind it so how can you say they are even equal?????????????? LOTR RULZ. u can just go kiss ant orc!
I do have a little thing for ant orcs.
blushes and giggles
Hello Mr. Emerson,
You are going to hell for your satanistic rituals. You might be sexy but that is no reason to defy GOD. I will laugh at you when you are down in hell eating pineapples and I in up in heaven being sexy.
Wow! I'm sexy and I get free pineapples! How cool is that??
Dear King Arthur,
Why do you hate Harry Potter? I liked your storys a lot until I found out about your rude actions toward Harry. You should learn more about The Boy Who Lived. Try going to www.mugglenet.com
I'll have to check that site out, thanks!
-King Arthur
Excuse me mister know it all! You thing youre the biggest harry potter fan! Will your not I AM!!!!!!!! So stop thinking your a great harry potter fan! I AM!!!!!!! YOUR NOT!!!!!!!! So I have the following requests. I want you to close this site. I want you to write me back saying that I AM the biggest harry potter fan and your not. I want you to write an apology letter to everyone who has visited this site for making them think you were the biggest harry potter fan. That Is all.
I think it's time for someone's nappie.
what the hell is with you people!!!!!!!!! u are all obsessed with this stupid movie and book. you brainwashed my friend. she's like in love with harry f****** potter and oliver wood. i say oliver (what a gay name) and harry can go to hell!!!!!!!!! I actually liked the movies until i saw this web site!!!!!!!!!!! the only good thing about u is u like good music..... except for steve. steve u pansy!!!!!!!!!!! people like you make everything worse...... FAGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now I know why Tigers eat their young. Eeesh.
THER ARE NO SIMILARITES BETWENN LORD OF HTE RINGS AND HARRY POTTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 THE LORD OF HTE RINGS IS SOOO MUCH BETTER THAN HARRY POTTER!!!!!!!!!! SO GET A LIFE AND GO AWAY AND LEAVE US ALL ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
Let's take a look at few of the points this letter brought up:
"There are no similarities between Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter!"
Au Contraire, there are quite a few of them.
"Lord of the Rings is so much better than Harry Potter. Get a life and leave us alone!"
Get a life and leave you alone? I see. I actually really like Lord of the Rings, I don't know why so many people assume that I hate it. (Books = good, movies = great.)
Jingle bells The Harry Potter Director Smells
The cast lade a egg
JK rolling mobile lost a wheel & the smart people got away(just a hint we are the smart people)
From
(names omitted)
Ps plz tell us What you think
I thought it was absolutely dreadful. If you sang like that two thousand years ago, people would have stoned you to death. My advice would be, if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't.
i once again demand that u remove this site imediatley cause i use to like those hp books but your site has mannaged to change my mind thanx now ill remember this site as the one which changed my mind over harry potter & if it is hagrid who will die in book five well then its for the better i always liked that guy but now because of your website i am glad that the evidince that we have points mostly to him that half giant deserves to die however may i shall state I continue to read those terrible books for the reason of more info to use against you & your site
from name will not displayed
This is trivial, I know, but next time, Daniel, make sure you don't already have your full name in your signature before you try to sign a hate letter anonymously.
Im the owner of **********.com. My site is nearly as popular as yours, but I want to get it more popular then yours. do a newspost about me, saying this:
"HI, Have you been to *********? Why dont you go now! GO TO **********.COM"
Please do this for me..... IF YOU DONT, then I WILL DESTROY MUGGLENET. I HAVE YOUR PASSWORDS, AND IF U DONT DO A POST THEN I WILL DO IT FOR YOU... AT THE SAME TIME AS DELETING IT!
I tried getting hits by doing that post of mine a few days ago about Dan Radcliffe dying, but people didnt like it much, so Im hoping they'll like it on your site!
Thanks.. REMEMBER WHAT ILL DO IF U DONT DO THIS FOR ME!!!!
And you wonder why your site isn't as popular?
MR EMERSON,
I MUST SAY THAT MUGGLENOT,OH SORRY I MENT MUGGLENET STINKS.EMERSON,YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A BRAIN.YOU HAVE TO ASK OTHERS FOR A POLL IDEA!!? IM GOING TO MAKE MY OWN HP SITE AND THEN I PLAN TO DESTROY MUGGLENET.IT WONT BE HERE FOR LONG.
MuggleNet "stinks"? Did Dora the Explorer write that for you?
dear emerson i was wondering if you could tell me how dies in book 5 i know you said you wouldnt but i want to know because i dont know if i live to see book 5 i have stomache cancer and im not supposed to live more than a week i know i should be in te hospital but i dont want to be and well my birthday is june 21st so it most likely being my last birthday do you think you could fimd it in your ear to tell me
Let me go get a Q-tip and I'll get back to you if I find it.
One visitor's response to my comment:
your an imbusul. You have NO right to dismember a cripple in the dumb emails. His plea was turned down with ridicule. I hope you rot in hell for that emmerson
Alas, not today, not tomorrow, but one day, you too may develop a sense of humor.
We're all going to hell for reading Harry Potter anyway, right guys?
i was unjustly banned from the chat room for 60 days because i diddnt follow the rules.
I've considered your request and have decided (based on the circumstances) to extend your ban by an additional 60 days. -Damon, MuggleNet.com
Damon's response at my putting this up here:
You take all the fun out of life Emerson, now they get to find out I'm an ogre before actually having to deal with me.
ya i got ur e mail from the harry potter website thingy so do u like harry potter or sumthin??
Harry Potter, ew, no, it's this or jail. Only 2,261 hours of community service left!
Emerson, I hate this website. my name is emily watson, and i play HERMIONE GRANGER in the harry potter movies. I HATE THIS WEBSITE, TAKE IT DOWN NOW BEFORE I DENOUNCE IT IN PUBLIC!!! Thanks for your time, remember what I said. I have a lot of poser with words now that I'm famus. I have tried reading Harry Potter, and it's boring. Emily Watson
This person sent in about four other e-mails, each one getting progressively less intelligent.
Note: I'm quite aware that it is Emma Watson, not Emily, who portrays Hermione in the movies. You can stop emailing me. Thanks!
It costs money but for a good enough software for Mugglenet Interactive would be AOL Highspeed. The connections very fast and reilaible it gives avaible software to use.
I can't even bring myself to criticize such an...ah...uninformed suggestion.
Dear Emerson I am currently a computer security and intellgence professional and a harry potter fan. however I was alarmed by a newsposting in which call sheets from the set were linked to the snitch. Although these call sheets may seem harmless you must understand that these documents were replicated and illegally disclosed to the public internet. This documents can potentially threaten the secuirty and privacy of our actors. If future call sheets are posted and acquired by crimminals they could be used to exstort, stalk etc agian jeperdise the security of actors. Most fans would now know that Emma Watson was in the past was being stalked by a known Petafile imagine if a future call sheet was to fall into such a persons hands. Most people would agree we would not like to threaten the security of the actors and leaderson staff. I ask mugglenet to please not encourage to link exsternally or internally to any type of this information as any association with these types of materials has legal ramifications. Those leaderson staff whom divuldge such information are fully aware they are breaking the law and the legal rammifications for such actions. You may not think this security concern is likey however we now have a website master from the snitch whom has the telephone contacts of some of the cast and crew. Leaderson studios is far as I know has has prosecuted website owners for posting stolen documents and staff for disclose materials which compromise security . Please I hope we all can just respect the privacy and law when it comes to these types of materials and asses the materials before we post them online.
Dear God, maybe he's right...someone might go back in time three months and stalk an actor or actress!
(I should mention that the aforementioned call sheets are, in fact, three months old, and did not contain any personal information besides a few blacked out phone numbers for some of the lesser-known crew members.)
I didn't want to have to do this, but it's gone too far. There's this one user who tries to impersonate me and it's REALLY annoying. I'm Alicia on both The Forums and Mugglenet interactive, but this person sees fit to use "Alicia" on some areas of the site. (I'm talking about the person who sends news to you periodically). And she also used my name in a recent Caption Contest. I read the rules on the comments page, and it says specifically that you cannot impersonate someone you're not, which is what they are doing. ~Alicia
Perhaps it never crossed her mind that there just might be another person who visits the site that also has the name Alicia?
Emma was seen last night kissing Rupert in a cafe , but she was also seen a week ago kissing Daniel in that same cafe . So now she is dating two guys .
This was submitted as "News". What's REALLY sad is that we get emails like this every day.
From the hate mail you chose to post on the Wall of Shame, one could almost assume that you were perhaps...biased? [No, you think?] It potrays anti-HP people as stupid morons who can't spell [P-O-R-T-R-A-Y*], and makes me wonder if you've withheld the more intelligent hate mail. ["intelligent hate mail"? Are you kidding?] But it doesn't really matter how you say it, because HARRY POTTER SUCKS.
...I don't think I'll ever be able to recover from such a devastating insult.
I find it amazing that you have the audacity to accuse others of being moronic when your retorts mainly consist of fragments that contain incorrect capitalization of certain words within the sentence. Yes, your grammar usage (or lack thereof...) does serve as an indicator of your level of intelligence, since many people learn such simple rules in grade school. Your responses would be more effective if you'd... oh, I don't know... maybe actually address the issues presented in the letters? That IS why people write in, obviously. I know, I know... it sounds crazy.
Actually, it does sound crazy. Do you really expect me to take someone seriously who addresses me as King Arthur? You're officially the first person to ever stick up for the morons on this page.
Emerson- There's absolutely no way HP compares to The Lord of The Rings. You say you like the LoTR series? Then why are you wasting every day of your life on an HP site?
Um, maybe because I like Harry Potter more? These people clearly don't possess a single shred of common sense...
[Paragraph deleted due to creative use of the words "broomstick", "wand", etc.]
Could you please dress up as a maid or a super hero of your choice and post it in your photo gallery. Not because i want it, i just think it would be super amusing.
Thank you for your time. Love always,Charlie and his SEXY lover. Get back to me and want to see that picture!
Here you go. Dressed up like a Rugrat. I hope you like it
Edit: No, that's not really me.
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"Give her hell from us, Peeves!"
"I'm getting out of here before one of you comes up with another clever idea to get us killed, or worse, expelled!"
