curious

i am curious about this. how do people decide what is pleasant and what is not. I have seen these things.

sometimes it is acceptable to be unpleasant to someone. actually if everyone is being unpleasant to someone, the group gets very angry with a person who speaks against that and does not conform.

sometimes loyalty is involved, so if your friend is unpleasant to someone, then it is bad for you to support your friends enemy, no matter what the injustice. also your friend gets very angry if you disagree with his/her actions.

sometimes a person is so unpleasant that everyone very nice to them in case they attract the same horrible behaviour. in that case, everyone aligns with nasty person in any conflict so they do not get hurt too.

it is very hard to figure out what is going on.