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Nude Family Bed

January 22 2003 at 1:10 AM
RandyD  (no login)
from IP address 207.30.240.110

 
I was talking to a guy at work who told me that when he was growing up in Okla his whole family slept together in one big bed from the time a kid was a baby to they were 7 or 8 years old. Even more incredible- none of them wore clothes so they were all right bare-skin to bare-skin! He said that it was a old family tradition in that part of the country and was suppose to promote family 'bonding'. And no, he insisted that there was no sex or kinky stuff happening. This sounded so crazy I though he had to be putting me on- but now that I've gotten to know him better, I think he was telling the truth. I must admit, the idea is rather fascinating to me. Has anyone else heard of such a thing?

 
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AuthorReply

(no login)
216.113.215.169

Re: Nude Family Bed

January 22 2003, 8:20 AM 

I knew a family several years ago in Toronto (relevant only because it has hot, hot summers) that had only 1 air-conditioned room in their home: the parents' bedroom. Often, the family - mother, father, and 2 sons - would sleep nude in the parental bed in summer. The mother was a good friend of mine and confessed to liking sleeping amongst all those exposed cocks. However, they did it to sleep better, not because it was a family tradition. She had raised her sons to feel good about their bodies, and the entire family was frequently nude entire summer days.

 
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(no login)
24.213.53.19

We didn't do that , but we...

January 22 2003, 8:27 AM 

When I grew up with parents and grandparents on my mother's side we would all take the traditional Finnish sauna (bath) together. The fathers never came in with us, but all the kids and moms would be naked together until we were maybe ten or so.

My son who is 25 and now my son-in-law while his wife is in the military, come to the sauna (traditional, wood fired stove and not electric) with me naked. When my son tells people about that they are shocked that he would be naked with his father and or brother-in-law together.

We think nothing of it, and in fact I have invited our male chiropractor and others over and it is very relaxing, and bonding. None have complained and said they enjoyed it.

 
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Cool beans boi
(no login)
198.74.20.73

Not quite the same but...

January 22 2003, 8:29 AM 

Sometimes on Sunday mornings my parents and I hang out in their king size bed and read the NY times together. It is a relaxing time just chatting, reading and sharing bagels.

Chris

 
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Dave P.
(no login)
207.30.240.87

Family bed

January 22 2003, 11:15 AM 

If you research "family bed" on the net you will find that a lot of people believe in this. It seems to be an old idea that is getting popular again.

 
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(no login)
204.65.32.153

Naked in front of Mom

January 22 2003, 2:51 PM 

I don't mind my mom catching me swimming naked in the pool (see earlier posts), but I won't be sleeping naked in the same bed with her. YUCK!!!

 
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CW
(no login)
63.148.81.103

Naked in front of Mom

January 22 2003, 9:07 PM 

Bobby, Family bed isn't about sleeping with your Mom, it's about spending time with your family. I don't understand why you would be cool with your Mom seeing you naked at the pool, but not in bed.

 
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(no login)
209.240.198.60

To Claify...

January 22 2003, 10:35 PM 

One of the above posts mentioned a family that slept in the same bed together with no clothes on. That's not my cup of tea...but swimming nude in my backyard pool is something I do all the time during the summer and it's no big deal if my mom comes home and finds me and my friend Damon naked out at the pool.

 
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J
(no login)
63.148.81.103

Naked in front of Mom

January 22 2003, 9:28 PM 

Bobby F,I think people are too uptight about their bodies. Guys should to be able to take their clothes
in front of their Mom's just like their sisters do without feeling embarrassed. It shouldn't matter if the guy is hard or soft, he should be able to take off his pants or shorts and feel good about himself.

 
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(no login)
209.240.198.60

Yes...

January 22 2003, 10:05 PM 

J, I couldn't agree more. I am totally comfortable with my body -- in or out of clothes. I'm just not interested in doing the family bed thing, that's all...unless my bud Damon is naked with me.

 
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J
(no login)
216.206.137.19

Re: Yes...

January 23 2003, 12:32 AM 

Bobby, It sound to me like your friend is part of your family.

 
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Dave P.
(no login)
207.30.240.134

Nude is not lewd

January 22 2003, 8:02 PM 

Why in this country is nudity always linked with sex? Nude is just not having clothes on. You can sleep nude with a person without sex being envoled.

 
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Andy
(no login)
206.181.220.5

Nudity is NOT lewd

January 23 2003, 10:35 AM 

I agree 100%. Nudity is not lewd. Many people here in America seem to make that connection (wrongly)...
we need to have a more open mind and realize that casual nudity IS NOT immoral, or have to lead to sex.

 
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cdadbr
(Login cdadbr)
205.188.209.134

"sleeping with"

January 23 2003, 8:51 PM 

A mixed couple who sleeps together is usually associated with "doing it" whether "it" was done or not, or even if they were sleeping nude or not. The various "sleeping" activities usually meant that sex did happen between the two parties, especially unmarried participants--like how can you NOT do "it" if you're in bed together??

If a younger female "slept around" it could have mixed connotations depending on who was involved. If a guy "slept around" it usually meant good things about him.

That's how it was in the more conservative times prior to the '80s (when clothes were tighter fitting and sex was "dirty" and the air was becoming more "dirty" too). There's probably some more current lingo for these things now, I suspect.

Enjoy!
cdadbr

 
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(no login)
216.113.215.89

Re: "sleeping with"

January 23 2003, 9:29 PM 

Not only is nudity not lewd, but sex isn't either.

BTW, I've slept with dozens and dozens of people with whom I didn't have sex. In addition to my parents (same room anyway; usually not same bed) and my children, the list includes all kinds of friends and acquaintances, especially as a university student on a budget, which I was for 9 years. 2 double beds in a hotel or motel easily sleep 4. That's not to say I didn't have a boner the whole night or didn't get up to whack off, but we didn't have sex, and the context was non-sexual.

 
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(no login)
207.30.240.96

Silly euphemisms

January 23 2003, 10:27 PM 

We bashful Americans are full of euphemisms for body functions.
We don't go to the 'toilet'- we go to the 'bathroom'- or if in pubic- to the 'restroom'.

And as noted- you can sleep with someone without having sex, and you can have sex without sleeping with them- so to use sleep as a synonym for sex makes no sense at all.

Why can't we just say what we mean?

 
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Running Bear
(no login)
209.240.237.125

Semantics

January 24 2003, 11:47 AM 

We do say what we mean. Our cultural environment has given rise to a certain set of expectations when we use symbols such as "sleeping with" and we react accordingly.

 
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(no login)
207.30.240.175

Re: Semantics

January 24 2003, 2:32 PM 

So according to you, if my daughter is spending the night at a friend's house and will be "sleeping with" her friend, I am to infer they are having sex?

 
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cdadbr
(Login cdadbr)
64.12.97.9

sleeping with . . .

January 24 2003, 3:42 PM 

That phrase was usually saved for mixed gender couples.

 
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(no login)
207.30.240.141

Word-games

January 24 2003, 7:23 PM 

Can't we just say what we mean instead of playing word-games?

 
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cdadbr
(Login cdadbr)
152.163.189.101

they knew . . .

January 24 2003, 8:53 PM 

In the earlier times of the '50s, '60s, and thereabouts, the people who used these terms knew full well what they meant and those who didn't probably could figure it out if they thought about it a little bit. Babies (that were not bonafide premature babies) always took 9 months to happen and if they didn't, it meant some fooling around had taken place--especially if it was born 7 months after the wedding and was full term.

Also, having sex other places than the back seat of a car (which had plenty of room in those days!) or in a bed was not always done. Guys slept in separate beds from females that weren't their wives back then too, probably even separate rooms if possible. Playboy magazine was still a great taboo item for males to have or read and Penthouse hadn't happened yet so the idea of having sex in other places (like the kitchen table or another unromantic place) was not fully developed or acted upon, typically. Things were different then, for sure. Lots of innuendo instead of plain talk about "private matters".

This was also back when sex was for procreation and not specifically for enjoyment, unlike later times. When the concept of a man forcing sex on his wife (i.e., rape) was totally unheard of as it was her wifely duty to comply with his needs, typically, and to help build their family. Then came the sexual revolution of the '70s and it was ok to have fun during sex and to have sex for fun.

Just some thoughts . . .
cdadbr

 
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(no login)
207.30.240.192

Charade

January 25 2003, 3:06 PM 

Since I've been knocking around this planet nearly 57 years, I know all this cdadbr, but that doesn't mean we have to continue with this silly charade.

 
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cdadbr
(Login cdadbr)
205.188.209.134

Code Words/Phrases

January 26 2003, 9:40 PM 

Well, with all due respect, it appears from many of the comments in this deal and others, code words/phrases are still alive and well and don't show any signs of diminishing. There are some items where some added sensitivity or "for family member consumption" dialogue require the need for such code words/phrases whether all of us like it or not. Such words/phrases tend to candy-coat things so they might not be quite so offensive or explicit to others who don't care for those details. They also allow us to be more creative in how we say things too.

There will always be a multitude of words for female and male gender-based attributes and equipment that are not medically based or correct, for example--slang, if you will. Similarly, we've seen the code words/phrases for "going without underwear" expand with "wearing dick" and others than "freeballing" or "going commando" in the much more recent times. Like it or not, they are here to stay.

Respectfully, just some thoughts,
cdadbr

 
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(no login)
216.113.215.166

Some things will remain unsaid

January 25 2003, 5:46 PM 

I agree w/ Nat'ssentiments, but I doubt that as a society we'll ever become totally psecific. That I slept with someone doesn't mean that I had sex with them. We just slept together. Likewise, I can say I had sex with someone. While that at least conotes that someone likely orgasmed, it's still not specific. It could be oral or anal sex - vaginal sex in 2-gendered situations - or mutual or dual masturbation. And it may not mean orgasm at all. It might be just fondling. I doubt we're ever going to get totally specific. All this being said, I wonder how many Americans rest in the restroom or how many Canadians wash in the wash room - except their hands if they've had a bowel movement?

 
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cdadbr
(Login cdadbr)
64.12.97.9

others . . .

January 24 2003, 3:40 PM 

Just like saying a baby had "blisters on his/her feet" if it was born too soon after the wedding, meaning "it" happened prior to the blessings of holy matrimony.

cdadbr

 
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Terry-K
(no login)
207.30.240.23

Restrooms

January 25 2003, 8:00 PM 

It is silly isn't it. I guess a tourist from Europe sees "Restroom" on a door and expects to find beds and recliners inside. We all know what goes on in there- so can't we just say- "Toilet room" or simply 'Toilet'? Do they think this would damage small children or shock old ladies?

 
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MJ
(no login)
198.81.26.232

Re: Restrooms

January 26 2003, 12:11 PM 

I remember in 4th grade, our teacher would always give us a bad time if we asked to go to the "bathroom." She wanted us to use the term "restroom," and would always say "There's no bath in there--don't say bathroom." I always wanted to reply, "Well there's no bed in there either so why say restroom." I was too well-mannered and shy (and afraid of getting in trouble) to actually say that, but I never understood why no one else could see what seemed so logical to me.

 
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RJ
(no login)
207.30.240.161

Re: Re: Restrooms

January 26 2003, 4:40 PM 

I guess she wouldn't have approved of the "piss & shit room"?

 
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cool beans boi
(no login)
172.148.94.149

Re: Re: Re: Restrooms

January 26 2003, 6:19 PM 

Sitting on the bowl and reading can be "restful" so the name is not far off. :O)

 
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(Login LeRoy699)
65.133.252.234

Nude is not lewd

January 24 2003, 7:28 PM 

I posted the following in another forum and got only one reply comment. Anyone in THIS forum have any opinion?

When I was a wee widdle tot, my mother bathed me. I do not know at what age a child is supposed to bathe oneself. I cannot remember my age when my mother quit washing me all over and began the practice of just washing my back and then turning over the washcloth and soap for me to finish the job. My mother continued to wash my back until I went away to college. Yes, as a teenager I knew about brushes with long handles utilized for back washing but my mother said she could do a better job. I saw nothing wrong with having my mother wash my back. Many years later I was not so sure that it was okay. At age 17, her oldest sister did the chore about half a dozen times. I felt no shame at her seeing my naked body because she was my mother's sister. Presently I have mixed feelings about whether it was appropriate for the activity to go on for so long a period in my life.


 
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Jr
(no login)
216.206.137.140

Re: Nude is not lewd

January 25 2003, 12:06 AM 

I wouldn't say that there is anything wrong with it, but it is kind of unusual for a Mom to wash her 17 year old son's back. 1. Are you a freeballer? 2.Did you cover up your genitals while your Mom was in the bathroom with you or did you leave them uncovered?

 
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(Login LeRoy323)
65.133.252.140

Nude is not lewd

January 25 2003, 4:07 PM 

Have been a freeballer since 12 years old. I have slept nude since that time, also. No need to cover anything because my mother has seen me naked all the time. She even caught me masturbating and she did not lecture me on it such as I'd go blind if I kept doing it.

 
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C
(no login)
216.206.137.140

Re: Nude is not lewd

January 25 2003, 12:21 AM 

I don't know of any 17 y/o guys who would want their Mom's seeing them in the shower, much less washing their backs because of the " woody factor ".

 
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(Login LeRoy323)
65.133.252.140

Nude is not lewd

January 25 2003, 4:12 PM 

I say that any 17 yr old guy whose mother is still alive should not be ashamed of being seen naked by the mother because most likely she washed him from babyhood. I just don't know at what age the mother quits washing her boy.

 
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(no login)
216.113.215.166

Woddy lewd?

January 25 2003, 5:50 PM 

In my own humble opinion, nor is being hard lewd. It's what you do with it. Hard is natural.

 
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(no login)
207.30.240.161

Moms & woodies

January 26 2003, 4:55 PM 

Every mom is familiar with the fact that male infants often get erections during diaper changes. And any adult woman knows that males of all ages routinely get erections that are of no sexual significance, so no mom is going be traumatized at the sight of her son with an erection.

 
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