Interesting weekend. I had two dud shows in a row! (IMHO) In my honest opinion!
Saturday was the biggest birthday party I've ever been to. They rented the community center and had about 20 tables packed with people, a clown in the corner doing balloons and face painting and a train outside taking kids for a ride. I had been told 60 kids, so I brought a bigger sound system to compensate for adult chatter. But I kept losing kids during the show! I started with about 20 and ended with 8. (There weren't 60)

The cure? I asked when the train and clown would be done and I was willing to wait, but they wanted me to go ahead and start. The cure would have been to have no other choices at that time.

They gave me a huge tip, but I can tell you that it wasn't earned.

Then today I did a family show at a church. The crowd was about 30 feet because of a game area that had just been used. So I told the kids they could come and sit on the floor. The only problem was that ONLY the youngest kids came forward to "sit" on the floor they had just been running around on. It was okay, but I really got no feedback from the older kids or adults. I felt like I was doing a preschool show for a family audience.

Oh, well. If everyday was like this weekend I would look for a new job.

Oh Lord, I thought he was going to name noted vent duds!
You know one of the best(actually one of the very few) I ever got from a Board teacher mentor was, "sometimes it doesn't work. Occasionally, you get a class that doesn't fit your style." Now Tony, we know the teacher cheerleaders (they were the school keeners in grade eleven and thus are perfect teacher material) would disagree. Using my old media hat I'll backtrack on some recent posts.
First, we have Rev. Line 7000 earnestly writing, "Acting needy or greedy: You are there to work for them. Don't say, "I can come but I need a wireless mic. Say, "To best serve you I could use a wireless lapel mic. If you don't have one I can bring my own."
Next we have a highly aggressive( yet I realize experienced and realistic) Ken Groves preaching,"the success of a show is 80 per cent determined by controlling the stage conditions before you arrive." Yes and the Pope is RC.
Tony,in 22 years of being a radio newsman I took the high road and did not set up people or also was not a stooge for cops or politicians. And now in my middle age time, I can look back with pride on one of my two careers. YOU did the right thing, man. I appreciate you sharing your dud tales to help soothe MY certain,future duds. However,the key is if your family's fine ,you're all right. Open your hymn book brothers and sisters to page 123 in the green book and let's sing "On the Wings of a Snow (Cdn.eh?)White Dove" ron

It's very kind of you to take the time to write a personal reply. Your words are well received.

You said something that all entertainers should remember: ..."in 22 years of being a radio newsman I took the high road and did not set up people or also was not a stooge for cops or politicians. And now in my middle age time, I can look back with pride on one of my two careers."

You had opportunities to get laughs at the expense of radio guests. You also had the opportunity to allow yourself to be a megaphone for someone else's agenda, but you chose not to. Now you look back and think, "I chose the path less traveled by, and that has made all the difference." (Robert Frost)

As entertainers it is often the best joke that goes untold. We proudly say, "I bit my tongue" when that happened. I have rarely looked back and said, "I wish I would have told this joke." But I have often (especially as a teacher) looked back and thought, "I shouldn't oughta said that!" Of course, as a teacher I never used those exact words.

My mouth has been a curse and a blessing. Self-control is exactly what it says and the entertainer who has it will go far.

I saw a good example of this at a comedy concert at a local community college. I'm sure I've mentioned it before, but there was a member of the audience who was in the front row when the second comic came out. He had been up on stage with the first comic (a magician) as a volunteer so people knew that he was mentally challenged. His choice in clothes (it looked like he broke into the Love Boat wardrobe) was further proof. When the second comic came out this young man kept calling out. Nothing bad. He was just trying to carry on his own conversation with the comic. You could visually see (as in any other method) him biting his tongue. He put the person next to the young man in charge of him. "Hey, Buddy. There are a few things I could say right now, but I'm not going to. I want you to have a good time. But it's time for the show and this is where you get to listen and I get to talk." I don't remember anything else the comic said that night, but I would highly recommend him simply for the things he didn't say.

tony,
thanks for sharing. although new to this field, i have been on stage for more years than i wish to remember. i hate when things don't work and there will always be a show that doens't 'WORK'.
that needs to be shared just as much as all the wonderful gems you have already shared with us. i know that for me, i usually hit "print" when ever i see one of your postings, what you are saying is way too important to miss.
I recently did a show at a campground for a church campfire.
lets look at what is wrong here, hmmm, "campground", "campfire", "show". those three should not go together. campground denotes i'm out in the "real" open, (no bandshell etc) campfire denotes dark, (no electricity), show, well how about 2 1/2 routines before it got too dark for anybody to see me. ken groves spoke about backdrop, lets see, i was standing facing the fire, what was behind me was a couple of picnic tables , and a lot of empty framed by a winnebago in the distance.
it is very tough to work with 17 flashligts in your face!
yes i got applause, but it seemed more of the polite, condisending type. I dare say that yours was still a better experience.
thanks again for sharing, maybe this could be addressed in your book, "what happens when the show doesn't"
mark

I once read for a part in a play where my only line was with a dying breath. Then I had to lie down. They said I was a natural! It must be from all those years of dying on stage.

I didn't want to..I shouldn't have. After dinner tonight the assembled multitude coaxed me to show them some tricks. Talk about fast set up down in the rec room.
Healed and Sealed bombed( my poor setup); I by accidently did only half of the vanishing Pepsi can(only got it as a gift last night). However,the long Vanishing Bandana (banana) skit went off well.
Two duds, Tony but I learned two valuable lessons. First, don't be hurried into a performance of an illusion(not really a big deal) and secondly, one learns a lot even when a trick bombs.