As I was working in the garden today I began to realize that customers are like plants.

If you are a new entertainer you feel much like the gardener who has been given a blank plot of ground. You can only imagine it completely full and you can't wait for that day.

But I know many gardeners who wish they had a little more room in their garden. Plants grow on their own, just as different types of customers will grow by word of mouth. Someday your calendar will be so full you will be wishing there were some empty spots.

But in the meantime, treat those few customers you do have like plants. They take a lot of care when you first acquire them. The roots are not deep. Return phone calls quickly (especially for birthday calls where they are just going down the list.) Send an e-mail stating what your understanding of their request is.

Choose your customers. Not all plants go together well, and not all types of customers will fit your niche. I don't feel that I'm good at walkaround magic and in two years I've turned down about $2000 worth of possible income by passing them on to someone who is excellent. However, in turn I may get crumbs from the walkaround magician when someone asks if he does puppets. Each gardener chooses his/her own plants.

Some plants are annuals. You will see them once and then they disappear forever. Others are perennials. They will come back into your life each year, or every other year. They still need fertilizer and tending, so don't neglect them or they will go away.

I rarely get called back for birthday parties in future years. The kids are older and they remember the puppet guy who did their little kids' party. Now they want a magician, or a bounce house, or laser tag. Those are annuals.
It's Kid's Day at the zoo and they remember the guy that had all the cool looking latex animal puppets. They've shopped around, but nothing comes close so they call me back. Those are perennials.

Many plants get fertilized after they blossom. Roses need the most care after the flowers have begun to fade. That's when you deadhead them, clip them at 45 degrees just above the 5 leaf segments, (making sure it is as thick as a pencil) and sprinkle fertilizer around them. Some of your customer work must come AFTER the show. Thank you cards, with a printed statement...our business grows best by word of mouth. Enclose a couple of extra business cards. Those are like seeds that get planted by someone other than yourself.

Ten years ago I spent at least 3 days a week doing something in the yard. Now, I spend one day every month or so trimming the garden. I get to enjoy sitting in the shade, or eating nectarines or peaches with a minimum of effort. Today I got a call from a school that has me every other year or so. Nice!

Remember that the plant isn't able to shade the gardener until the gardener has spent many years tending the plant.

I too am well into gardening although I can't grow what i once could near Detroit.
Ron Remember Bern when we lived in a latitude level with northern California?
Bern We could grow plums and we learned when the plums were dry on the tree it was time to prune. plus if you're looking for plums on an orange tree your search will be fruitless.
Ron Remember the gorgeous dutch tulips we had in the spring?
Bern Yep, and how about how long it took us to discover that tulips are better than one and that chapped lips were cured by tulip salve.
Ron Gee Bern you're like an organic farmer. You till it like it is. Does your girlfriend help with the gardening?
Bern Yep I have to keep at her to go for supper. She's always working over-thyme in her herb garden and doesn't want to cumin.
Ron Bern how did you ever capture such a great gal?
Bern Well, Theresa I said, "if we canteloupe lettuce marry.
Ron Bern, I don't see many starlings bothering your cherries. How come?
Bern Well, my scarecrows are always garden their patch.
Ron Well Bern I hear the diogs barking..so someone's coming. Did you plant strawberries this spring?
Bern Nope I was going to because my nephew the research assistant wanted to experiment with the Lord Simcoe variety but he couldn't because he hadn't botany.





10. The research assistant couldn't experiment with plants because he hadn't botany.

Axe..please delete the #10 line. Thanks Ron

It looks like your garden grows well! This isn't mine and I can't recall the church lady that wrote these lyrics, but they're fun.

Lettuce rejoice in the Lord
Even when troubles turnip.
I really don't carrot all.
Cause I've bean talking to God.

I've got such peas in my heart.
It beets anything I know.
So when troubles sprout,
I squash them out,
and that's how my garden grows.

If anyone really wants to know they can ask Liz VonSeggen of www.onewaystreet.com. She may recall the lady's name.