This message has been edited by axtell from IP address 126.96.36.199 on Nov 19, 2009 9:17 AM This message has been edited by axtell from IP address 188.8.131.52 on Nov 7, 2009 7:16 AM This message has been edited by axtell from IP address 184.108.40.206 on Nov 7, 2009 7:14 AM
Wow! I think I've found my Ebenezer Scrooge! Incidentally, my wife loves the fact that I know what I want for Christmas.
tweezers not included
September 29 2009, 12:07 PM
I'm expecting to see some substantial nose and ear hair on this guy.
September 30 2009, 6:24 AM
This guy could be Moses, Lazarus, Elijah, Elisha, Methuselah (don't call him Meth for short), etc.
"I'm Al Capone. The statute of limitations is finally over."
"I'm Elvis Presley. I just wanted a little peace and quiet for awhile, but in today's economy I decided to start performing again." (sings, Love Me REAL Tender)
Hair and suff...oops Stuff
September 30 2009, 8:09 AM
Yeah! Nose hair, ear hair and lots of optional looks. Wizard beard, whisker stubble, mutton chops.....
Got an idea from your post Tony....
"WORLD'S OLDEST ELVIS IMPERSONATOR"
This could be hilarious. Imagine bald head but side burns... looses his breath as he sings..
Song titles could be changed to fit an elderly singer...
Love Me Tender - - "Cook it Tender, Smash it soft, never let me choke"
Heartbreak Hotel - becomes - "Heart Mon-i-tor"
Blue Suede Shoes - "Blue Suede Slippers"
All Shook Up - "Geritol....it's all shook up"
Or the world's oldest Rocker singing these hit songs...... (got these off the internet)
Bobby Darin's ---
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.
It was nice seeing and hearing the thoughts and ideas of a people who were all but wiped out and to think what it could have been like if instead of the indean wars we were able to live together in peace, but such is the human animal
COST OF OLD AGE
October 8 2009, 1:14 PM
AX, I love it!!!! what are you thinking this guy would run? would you have the basic model and then a custom geezer? so if I wanted a certian hair color or style I could get it at a cost?
I am eagerly awaiting to see how this one turns out.
Oldest man jokes
October 12 2009, 4:00 PM
There is an old tape by Mel Brooks called "The 2,000 Year Old Man". If you're planning on getting the puppet you might want to find it on Amazon (or check your local library) and get some ideas. It is more about humorous history than it is a skit, but it might spark ideas.
Vent: I am so amazed that you are the oldest man in the world! Why do you think you're still alive at your age?
Figure: I'm not a scientist, but I think it's because I haven't died yet!
Vent: Do you have trouble remembering anything?
Figure: No, not really. I , um, I, uh... Would you repeat the question?
Vent: Do you find it difficult to remember things?
Figure: You already asked me that! Ha! Gotcha! No, I have a memory like a steel trap! Of course, most of the time it's closed!
Vent: I think the audience would love to hear about your diet. Which foods do you like to eat?
Figure: Well, I don't eat a lot. For some reason I always feel stuffed! I don't eat small portions though. And I don't eat LARGE portions. At my age it's important to stay "regular". I usually eat two meals a day.
Vent: That isn't much.
Figure: But right before I go to bed I drink two glasses of water! That keeps me alive! That way I know I HAVE to get up in the morning!
Vent: What is your earliest memory?
Figure: I forget.
Vent: What do you remember about your childhood?
Figure: Oh, that. Well, I remember a lot.
Vent: Did you have a pet?
Figure: Oh, yes. I had a Pterodactyl named Terry. I used to tie a rope on it and fly it like a kite. Wonderful pet.
Vent: Did you have a dog?
Figure: No. They hadn't been invented yet. I remember the milk man. He used to come over and milk the mastodon and leave a jar at the front of the cave.
Vent: Now, surely you can't expect us to believe you are that old!
Figure: No. I'm just pulling your leg. After all, you keep pulling my arm!
2000 year old man - Mel Brooks & Carl Reiner
October 12 2009, 8:28 PM
Clothing size guess
October 22 2009, 10:16 AM
Any idea as to what size clothes the world's oldest man will wear? There is a vampire outfit at Toys R' Us that would be great for him (as a Victorian gentleman, rather than vampire). But I don't know what size he will wear. Any estimates?
October 22 2009, 1:43 PM
We are using a kid size 5 tux on him. Ax
October 22 2009, 1:54 PM
Ooooh! He comes in a tux? Great! Ready for the next stage of his life!
October 24 2009, 3:15 PM
He will be offered in a number of looks
World's Oldest Magician
In a tux, holding a break away wand) you could put some cards hanging out of his sleeve and then have give the tux a shot or two of baby powder so it looks moth eaten and dusty. He comes out patting off his clothes like they are really old. He could have a comb-over or just balding look. beard or no beard, whiskers or no...
World's Oldest Wizard
In a robe with bare feet and sandals holding a staff that he hits you with when he laughs. Very long hair and beard.
World's Oldest ________
come up with some of your own ideas.... I've got about 10 more.
(Forgot to add my name!)
worlds oldest ventriloquist
October 24 2009, 4:58 PM
what if he were the worlds oldest ventriloquist and he says that he has a dummy and he uses the classic "dummy that looks like you"
First Look at the Puppet!
October 30 2009, 2:04 PM
World's Oldest Wizard / Ancient Style
November 7 2009, 7:14 AM
WORLD'S OLDEST MAN - Ancient Style! We wanted to see how he looked as a Wizard or Biblical Character like Methuselah. What do you think??
November 7 2009, 7:58 AM
Gives him an almost Asian look. He could have wise sayings (which are not so wise) or questions of the ages. "Does the light really go off in the refrigerator when you shut the door?" Steve Taylor and Sammy Smith have a book of 200 of these types of questions so your routine is already available!
Add a crown and you've got a king who insists that if he falls asleep everyone yells, "Long live the king!" The robe is befitting a king more than a prophet. It looks like Satin.
November 7 2009, 8:01 AM
How about an optional false set of latex or fabric teeth that fall out when he first starts to speak?
Re: WORLD'S OLDEST MAN
November 9 2009, 7:51 AM
The scrunchy brow is great when it comes down!
November 9 2009, 7:58 AM
The World's Oldest Man is now available! Thanks for the orders.