This is all pretty pathetic, Elijah Who Drives Drunk.
At the risk of sounding as much of a machismo pig as you, I'd bet money that if you got on a bike and tried to race me I'd kick your fucking ass! You'd fall in the ditch puking just trying to keep up with me, and you wouldn't get close.
That picture I posted of myself last year sometime as our mascot, well, she is long gone. And just like Lance, I ain't doping!