I don't think girls' perspectives are a major factor in defining "manhood", at least not in the eyes of young males. As I noted before, there are so many contradictory criteria now for what "makes a man" that no one can really qualify. Today, females can (increasingly do) fulfill all the positive "man" criteria of the past as well as or better than males. They can do anything a man can do, often better (we are always told this) and can do things men cannot do. Today, a male is simply a less-qualified female that lacks the ability to bear children. With the loss of opportunities to qualify as a man on positive terms, what young males have available to them is trying to qualify as a man on negative terms. This means being aggressive, being "bad", being a force to be reckoned with, risking injury and death. Until girls take over the bad criteria (and their numbers are growing there as well), that seems to be the remaining ground for males hoping to qualify as men to try to stake out.
None of this really makes sense, Nat. If you try to make sense of it, you will just end up shaking and scratching your head.