Yes, my emotional side does sort of hold it against women in general that our American cultural appears (to me) increasingly anti-male, including but not limited to divorce and child custody. I know a lot of divorced men who get stuck in that emotional state, but they tend to blame the one woman who was involved in their painful situation and much less so women in general. I return from time to time to the emotional side . . I don't think that is too weird, even all these years later, as I think most men would admit, down deep, that their relationships with women have far-reaching impacts (positive and negative) upon their lives. As I noted before, men's relationships with women "hit us where we live." Women ARE important to us.
Unlike a lot of divorced men, I don't mostly blame one woman, my ex-wife. My analogy was supposed to demonstrate that the problem is much more the laws and interpretations by courts rather than any one person. As I have told other men, "Your wife could not have done these things to you, no matter how vindictive she is, if the legal system did not grant her the ability to do so." And, per my analogy, I consider myself an ethical and non-mean person, and if I were granted the legal authority to take something away from someone, I might not jump to do it . . but given that knowledge, enough time passing, and events that might anger me, I would probably at least threaten action and maybe even make good on the threat. Women, being people, are not immune to this. If they know they can harm a man, and the right motivation arises, they are quite capable of making husbands' lives hell (more so if they are good men).
The rational side of me is what made me realize that my ex-wife was not mostly at fault. In fact, as I noted here before, she didn't take all the actions against me that the law allowed her to. She showed me some mercy, perhaps helped by my willingnmess to push some guilt buttons. Some other women likely would have bided their time and enjoyed twisting the knife and leaving me dangling. But, I was smart enough to realize she held all the cards, so being very hostile toward her would simply give her every reason to play every card and make the outcome even worse for me. Now, my biggest concern is for my sons -- that they not suffer as I have done because the law gives preferences to their partner over them. There is no perfect solution to divorce, but to say that half the population are the good people, and half are bad people that deserve punishment, simply because of their particular genital configuration, just doesn't make sense in these days when we are supposed to value treating people equitably and fairly.
While I do blame a category of women -- Feminists -- for pushing the anti-male agendas that were incorporated into our laws, I also blame men as a group. It was men's inaction in the face of the anti-male agendas that doomed them and future generations of American males to punishments simply because they are male. How man blacks would still be riding in the back of buses if blacks had waited on whites to change things? The same with men's rights: Men cannot wait for women to act in the interests of men -- men must take action in their own behalf. But, as we see here and everywhere, it is hard to get men to even see the injustice and need for change, let alone take action for change.
But, failing to act not only harms men but also harms women who might want a relationship with a man . . or at least have to live in a society with them. If the laws treat men who behave well worse than men who behave badly, what motivation do men have to do the right things? Very little.