I thought i'd post this message after writing my first 'love making' scene in my latest story.
I was just curious how much detail you think should be included in fantasy novels in the way of sex. After reading Catherine Asaro's latest book (The Misted Cliffs), the sex scenes were the most detailed i've read. Any thoughts?

Write what you are comfortable with. If uncomfortable you won't do a good job.

A piece from author 'Nancy Smith'.
"There is an erroneous belief that all novels, in order to be successful, must have 'spicy' scenes. This has arisen because many bestselling novels contain them.
The important question to ask, when considering whether or not to include sex, is it an 'integral' part of the story - or is it intended to shock or titillate?
If you don't feel comfortable writing them, leave them out. If you have to force yourself to write such scenes, they will come across as artificial & contrived.
Sex scenes (opposed to love scenes) can be tricky, she/he may feel inhibited putting on paper physical, erotic descriptions. (What will Aunt Mary think?)"

My advice..if you feel comfortable...do it.

I had the same question. I have a couple of scenes so far. One was an aborted love making - that wasn't too hard, the other was more. I wrote the description of the two exploring each others bodies and left it when "His desires grew with hers, until he could no longer hold back." The next line is "It was much darker when they woke, entwined in each other's limbs."

I don't know if I'm going to fill in the bits. I read and reread Jean Auel descriptions, particularly in Valley of the Horses. I don't think I could go that far, besides it doesn't quiet fit. Mind you I did enjoy reading, again and again!

I think I'll leave it for a while and go back. I know I have a few more to do. I'll see what comes out.

A friend did tell me that she has heard that there are people who will write sex scenes for your book. I know no more than that. Not sure if I want to.

Catrin

Good question, Timna. As you guys probably already know, I'm not backwards in coming forwards where sex scenes are concerned. However, I agree that it has to be part of the story, which means it either moves things forward or creates conflict. Ask yourself how the characters will feel about each other and their goals after they make love. Will they been even more motivated, or distracted by their attraction. Sex is a powerful thing, that's why there's so much taboo around it, so it's not something you toss into a story just for titillation value (not in a well motivated story, anyway). It has to mean something.

As to the question of how graphic you get, I suppose that's a matter of style really. And it also depends on how much sex you already have in your novel. You can't have 8 full-on sex scenes unless you're writing erotica. So I'd suggest one or two sex scenes fully explored and "shut the bedroom door" on the rest. Too much of anything (death, sex, grief, whatever) makes it lose its emotional impact. You want the reader to really react to the scene, not think, "Oh, here we go again." So less can be more.

A final point, let the characters voices come out in a love scene. Try not to choreograph it, but rather let the characters lead the way - let them make love the way that is most natural to them. So a shy character might be embarrassed about undressing, or conversely might have some secret fantasies to fulfil. If they're a nature-lover, they might want the soft grass beneath them. Try to be inventive, but always within the bounds of the character's own personality.

And if you find yourself having a cold shower afterwards (or a cigarette) then you know you're doing it right!

Within three posts i know what i have written is first well spaced and not too much detail, and second, very much need between these two sexual tensioned people. Afterall, i'm writing fantasy and not a hot and steamy romance novel. But, it makes you think how the characters will act post-cotial. My story only has one 'love' scene, and a few passionate kisses (2 to be exact) but i was curious what other people thought about too much detail. My scene doesnt even go for a page! Nice. Heres a nice topic for the chat room!

Funny you should say that, Louise. I did write one bit where my character was feeling desires that he didn't know how or if to express them. The next thing that happens is a whole lot of others walk in on the scene and pretty much everything went away. Was only a couple of paragraphs, and really the female in question didn't do much.

After I finished writing I went to bed (3am), woke up DH and ....

Catrin

I tend to write for young adults, so sex is very restricted just because of my own morals.
However I wanted to add my 2 cents by saying that I think the depth of the detail expresses how important the event is to the character. If it's a grief distraction, I'd write it short and very vague: the character doesn't really care. If it's born from the most passionate, wholehearted love, I'd respect that between the characters and not get too dug down in the details of the bodies, but instead of the minds.

For me, romance in books is just that, an emotional state that I am entranced by...it isn't about bodies moving. A guy pulling down his pants is no where near as sexy as a tender kiss on the cheek.
(I must be a romance author's dream reader!)

Catrin, you'd be surprised at how often husbands get woken up by late night writers

And Dale, I agree that what happens inside a characters mind in any scene is always the most important thing if you're writing a character-based story, but the reader expects visuals as well, whether it's an argument, a battlefield scene, a love scene or whatever. So we need to keep the externals happening or you fall into the 'talking heads' trap. You're quite right that the reason for the lovemaking should govern the amount of detail the character notices, and that's really what you're conveying - what the character notices while you're inside their head. If they've been lusting after someone for quite some time then they're going to notice every little thing that happens. If it's a distraction, as you said, they won't, they'll be focused inwards. Mood, in writing as in life, is the governing factor.

Timna, I think this is a fine topic for the Sunday night chat. We used to have a TOPIC thread, didn't we, where we worked out in advance what we wanted to discuss each week. Maybe we should start that again.

I think your right Louise, or i'm confusing it with another chatt room years ago. But either way i think its a great idea, as it is a big deal for writers of any genre being as romance, no matter to what detail, is apparent in majority of books.

Well see how it goes on sunday in anycase.

Timna

Great question Timna! One I think we all grapple with in every book. Especially we romance gals!

My books are really sweet, because that's what my characters tell me they like too! But as my books have gone on and I have become more comfortable with my characters, a few books have had sex scenes. Mine almost entirely focus on the emotion of the scene - how the characters are feeling, soaring, fretting, panicking etc... As I hope this gets an emotional response from the reader as well.

I have a book coming out next month and in it the hero and heroine make love, but I left it entirely to the readers' imagination and though my books are written for a sweet line, my editor yelled at me for not giving the reader the satisfaction of living through such an important moment for the characters. So remember too that if you have lots of sensual tension, that moment when the hero and heroine first kiss... Boy does that have impact!!!

Ally