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Re: New to Narcolepsy
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Melody,
Thanks for your insight. I still do not know if I shut down due to cataplexy or simply due to my childhood experiences. Either way it is tearing me apart. Everyone around me suffers because I come across as cold and uncaring. I really DO care but can't seem to find the "key" to MY gate of locked emotions. After 10 years of marriage I still am unable to tell my husband that I love him FIRST. I am able to say it back to him only as a response or as a goodbye over the phone. The problem is that I WANT to. I can lay beside him at night and want to say to him "I Love You" so bad that it physically hurts. For whatever reason, I can't. As rediculous as it sounds I even try to convince myself by counting down .... 1, 2 ,3 GO! Still nothing! It feels as though there is a real, physical barrier somewhere inside that simply won't allow it. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?