In honor of Robert Culp’s 77th birthday, here’s a special edition of the Bulwer-Lytton I Spy Quiz. Grab yourself a slice of cake and have fun chewing on these questions.




1. What does Kelly sing while burning ropes from his wrists with lit incense sticks in Now You See Her, Now You Don’t?

2. Who says “I am a thousand years old”?

3. What character(s) celebrate(s) a birthday during an I Spy episode?

Regards—

In honor of the "big guy's" special day:

Contrary to popular opinion, Kelly doesnot sing: Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight. Rather, in NOW YOU SEE HER . . . he sings:
"You live in the (ouch) zoo . . " [a child's second line to Happy Birthday].

Two Birthday Celebrations that come to mind in I SPY are of course:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVERYBODY (Paul Mathews, the young son of ex-agent Tom Mathews (Jim Backus); and from the first season:
Papa Charlie (Philip Ahn) in CARRY ME BACK TO OLD T'SING TAO (a favorite episode of mine). [Are there others??]

As to who says I'm 1,000 years-old; I don't know. It sounds like a Kelly line
after a "very long night."

Anyone out there want to add to this celebration?

I think France Nuyen in one of her two appearances as Sam, says she's "a thousand years old". If she didn't, she should have. I'm not sure which of the two episodes it's from, but "Magic Mirror" seems most probable.

Jimmy

WHAT????


No one knows the answer to #2 ... ?????


Tatia was going to sit back quietly and let everyone else jump in there and enjoy Bulwer-Lytton's great Bob Birthday Quiz ....


BUT ....


No one knows the answer to #2 ...?????


Well, this is definitely a sad state of affairs.


The answer is:

The WAR LORD!! The WAR LORD!!

(As in Chuang-Tzu, a.k.a. The General.
You remember - the cute one with the pony-tail and red robes,
that you may have noticed Tatia has a mild affinity for
.... yes, yes, THAT War Lord .)





As to being a 1000 years old ... I'll quote directly from the script here ....


CHUANG
My family have been rulers in China for a thousand years. A whole history of activity around the chairs. I am the last child in my family. With me the line runs out. And the game is over.

(softly, looking at the sky) - Almost dawn. Another half hour. I am a thousand years old, Mr. Robinson. If I were to marry a woman ... not Chinese, my soldiers would leave me. They have sworn an oath to serve me until death, but that would break it. I am not engaged in war any longer, not even in battle. This is a holding action. A habit, a winding down. It can only end in defeat. The Englishman's money will prolong it. No more than that.

(To Kelly directly) I do not want her here when it happens ... when it ends. These are the reasons you are taking her out, and these are the only reasons.

and later

The area is swarming with them by now, for miles.
(back to Kelly, cold, hard) Mr. Robinson, do not let a thousand years go for nothing.

Kelly returns his look with great compassion and respect for this amazing man.

KELLY
(hard, military: a lieutenant to his General) No, sir.

SCOTT
(urgent) We gotta go, Kel.

CHUANG
(weakening) - Take her. Go. That is an order.

Kelly picks up Katherine, slinging his Browning over his shoulder. He stands for an instant, looking down at the General.

KELLY
(quiet) - Goodbye, sir.

In another moment, Scott, Kelly and Katherine are gone.


~~~~~


I hope I have been of some value here, my Lord!


As always,
Tatia (& Chuang-Tzu, too)


~ ~

It is a sad state of affairs Tatia. I am grieved. Grieved and shocked. Grieved and shocked and a little embarrassed for having let you down. I blame the school system (why, for example, isn’t The Warlord a staple of middle school curricula?). And permissive parenting. And—who knows—maybe MTV too. What can be done? I haven't a clue. I can only perform my own small private penance. I’m going to take my Lexapro and watch The Warlord this evening.

Jimmy

Well, if THIS doesn't make him feel all better, I don't know what will!



As always,

Tatia


~ ~

Well, that’s certainly a relief! For a while there I was afraid my quiz had fallen in the Forum without making a sound. And I, too, was distressed that apparently only Tatia could identify a line of dialogue I find so powerful and memorable. You are all hereby sentenced to remedial Warlord watching.

For those of you who are playing along at home, here are the “official” answers.

1. What does Kelly sing while burning ropes from his wrists with lit incense sticks in Now You See Her, Now You Don’t?

“You live in the zoo,” part of a children’s parody of “Happy Birthday to You.” In my neighborhood the lyrics went like this:
Happy birthday to you
You belong in the zoo
You look like a monkey
And act like one too.




2. Who says “I am a thousand years old”?

Everybody’s favorite warlord, Chuang-Tzu.




3. What character(s) celebrate(s) a birthday during an I Spy episode?

Alan Loden, feeling neglected on his 13th birthday, steals an important device from his father’s lab and heads for the amusement park; little does he know the bad guys are hot on his trail (Little Boy Lost).

Paul Mathews is so excited about his birthday piñata that he can’t sleep; little does he know it contains a vial of nitroglycerin placed there by ex-con Frank Hunter (Happy Birthday Everybody).

Papa Charley’s sons-in-law, hoping to get on his good side, present him with a birthday cake; little do they know its Chinese inscription reads “To the honorable Shen Fong, on the occasion of the opening of his new tailoring establishment, with the best wishes of the Hong Kong Merchants Association” (Carry Me Back to Old Tsing Tao).

And the baby Angela delivers is having its literal birth day; little does she know it will soon fall into the clutches of the evil Tiba (My Mother the Spy).

Birthday jacket, birthday slacks




Birthday party, birthday whacks




Birthday cake around the world




Happy birthday—it’s a girl!



Regards—

Then too, let us remember the madras-jacketed, young Alan Loden (Ron Howard) who is snubbed by his important father on his birthday, thus setting off the events of LITTLE BOY LOST.

I am disappointed in myself, too. After begging B-L to do a quiz, I just didn't have time to try my hand at this one until today and now it's too late. I will try harder next time!

Becca