Rules of Negotiation and Our Demands:

1) Make us laugh. Or die trying.
2) Don't be surprised if you find yourself verbally pistol-whipped. It's all in the spirit of fun.
3) We want a helicopter...because hostage takers always ask for one in the movies, right? We don't ride no stinkin' buses. If you don't have a helicopter, make rotor noises by thumping on your chest while you linger, at least.
4) Don't be surprised if a cheese monkey mistakes you for a mate while you make rotor noises. Feed the cheese monkey at your own peril.
5) We're out of cheese. Bring cheese.
6) Papi's rule: Refrain from using the word "pussy" during negotiations, or risk the wrath of a scrawny Texan.
7) Take the feuding and flaming elsewhere. We're kinder, gentler hostage takers.
8) We want lots of bubble wrap. Stand-offs can be a bitch.
9) Run your cat through the shredder before entering. There's nothing like the sound of a screeching cat to break the tension.
10) Tell the SWAT team to keep their distance. But you're welcome to join in if you're new here. Don't be shy!

 

<< Previous Topic | Next Topic >> Return to Sanity Held Hostage   send a crush? August 29 2002 at 10:04 PM No score for this post Candy  (no login) from IP address 209.153.172.57   Ok here's a new one. I got an email from "send a crush.com" I do believe this is a scam. It tells you that someone you know has a crush on you. All you have to do is go to their site and enter the email address of the person you think it is, and they will tell you if you are right. Hmmmm I thought about this. I don't know anyone who would have a crush on me. I went to the site to investigate. Apparently if you don't guess the right email of the supposed crusher, they do not tell you who it is. I tested this theory by entering my yahoo email address. Nope their lips are sealed until you guess the right address. I thought, now there would be people who might enter the email addresses of everyone they know, and in doing so, the site can collect those email addresses and sell them to the millions of spam distributers who want you to see sex with animals and buy pills that will make your penis 1-3 inches longer. What is your take on this Rick?   Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts. Respond to this message    Author Reply (Login bawdy) Forum Owner 67.68.212.246 Re: send a crush? No score for this post August 30 2002, 3:42 PM  I've gotten those a few times. I just delete them. I think if you guess someone, an e-mail is sent to that person saying someone has a crush on them, even if you were just fishing. I think it's just a harmless, silly site for mostly teenagers (crushes?). Your theory could be right though. They may be gathering e-mail addresses to sell, but I doubt it.   Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts. Candy (no login) 209.153.172.10 Re: send a crush? No score for this post August 31 2002, 8:22 PM  So does this mean that you have been sending crushes to teenagers, and that is how you are getting them sent back? The only teenagers I know call me mom, and for the most part they do not like me much because I am old and have rules. That's what happens when you get old, you start making rules.   Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts. (Login bawdy) Forum Owner 67.68.212.159 Re: send a crush? No score for this post August 31 2002, 8:46 PM  No, but teens have visited my homepage, and I'm just the kind of intelligent, personable and funny guy people get crushes on. *cough, cough*   Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts. Current Topic - send a crush?   Respond to this message      << Previous Topic | Next Topic >> Return to Sanity Held Hostage