1) Make us laugh. Or die trying.
2) Don't be surprised if you find yourself verbally pistol-whipped. It's all in the spirit of fun.
3) We want a helicopter...because hostage takers always ask for one in the movies, right? We don't ride no stinkin' buses. If you don't have a helicopter, make rotor noises by thumping on your chest while you linger, at least.
4) Don't be surprised if a cheese monkey mistakes you for a mate while you make rotor noises. Feed the cheese monkey at your own peril.
5) We're out of cheese. Bring cheese.
6) Papi's rule: Refrain from using the word "pussy" during negotiations, or risk the wrath of a scrawny Texan.
7) Take the feuding and flaming elsewhere. We're kinder, gentler hostage takers.
8) We want lots of bubble wrap. Stand-offs can be a bitch.
9) Run your cat through the shredder before entering. There's nothing like the sound of a screeching cat to break the tension.
10) Tell the SWAT team to keep their distance. But you're welcome to join in if you're new here. Don't be shy!
(Login bawdy) Forum Owner from IP address 67.68.212.246
Seen any lately? I've seen a trifecta of stinkers this week..Pootie Tang, Wet, Hot American Summer, and The Animal. Hollywood should be embarrassed putting out crap like this. Bad as they are, nothing could make me watch Freddy Got fingered. I have my limits.
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The only one I have seen is The Animal. That was pretty bad. Who thinks this stuff up?
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Shorti (no login) 12.90.169.89
My most hated movies are some people's dream flicks.....
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August 31 2002, 8:34 AM
One of the worst movies ever made is The Matrix. If you had to live in that gray, tasteless world with a screw in the back of your neck, would you choose the pill to remember or forget? I mean come on! The "real world" was not appealing at all. And Keanu Reeves STINKS.
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I don't think The Matrix was a great movie, but it was a decent escapist flick. The fight scenes and special effects were good. The movies I mentioned were all less than 90 minutes long, I think, and probably were incomplete due to production problems (well, maybe not The Animal). Minus the credits, Pootie Tang clocked in at about 70 minutes.
A good rule of thumb..steer clear of flicks by SNL alum. There are the odd exceptions though (some Eddie Murphy, Bill Murray and Chevy Chase movies).
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Candy (no login) 209.153.172.10
Re: Bad movies
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August 31 2002, 8:18 PM
Never seen The Matrix. As for the old SNL team, I find Bill Murry amusing. I think Eddie Murphy really screwed up with the Nutty Professor stuff.
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I forgot Adam Sandler. Some of his movies are good, some not so good.
You no like Bill Murray? Meatballs, Caddyshack, Stripes, Ghostbusters? He's even been good in dramas-Mad Dog and Glory, Rushmore.
Chevy? Caddyshack, the Vacation movies, Fletch. But yes, he's hit a rut since.
I don't think Dana Carvey's had a funny movie outside of Wayne's World.
I forgot Mike Myers. Thumbs up for Wayne's World and Austin Powers.
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Shorti (no login) 12.90.168.194
Funny
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September 1 2002, 8:23 PM
Austin Powers was finny the first time only.
Carvey is funny not his movies, him.
I adore most of Sandler's work. For some reason, he cracks me up.
Murray = Groundhog Day - the ONLY one I like of his.
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Candy (no login) 209.153.172.46
Re:Funny
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September 1 2002, 8:34 PM
Dana Carvey was funny in Moving with Richard Pryor.
Chevy Chase was good in the Nat'l Lampoon movies
Adam Sandler...I'll have to try to remember what movies I have seen him in. Can't think of anything off hand.
I didn't see Austin Powers, but Wayne's World wasn't bad.
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Well, we're talking movies. Carvey's good at impersonations and creating characters, but I don't think he can drive a movie by himself.
A lot of things on SNL may work as a five minute sketch, but not as a full length movie. SNL has sucked for a long time though. I don't care for the cast and can't see any of them with successful movie careers. Will Farrell maybe, but only in supporting roles. I think they should pull the plug on the show.
Candy, rent the Austin Powers movies. Thank me later.
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