Fairytale clause?

Well, that's gotta suck for Hanamichi. I like the more business oriented tone that's set it. Like it's about money and the trade world.

"Scotch on the rocks, no ice," replied Sendoh.

Alright, I drink. So, I figure you may want to know that Scotch on the rocks IS scotch on ice. Rocks=ice ergo, impossible to have it without. As Yev says, it'd taste like shit otherwise.

Sendoh chuckled softly to himself. Yup, Lord Hanagata was pissed alright, it was well-known that when he was angry, which was a rarity on the man often known as the 'Steady Rock of Japan' he always ran his hand through his hair and his lips always drew into a thin line.

The whole setting and general tone seems fairly highbrow and almost archaic. Suddenly throwing in colloquialisms jolted me out of the settings. You might want to find another way of wording this. Maybe something like:

Sendoh chuckled softly to himself. Lord Hanagata seemed in high spirits, the tell tale signs of hair ruffling and tightened lips nonwithstanding, the 'Steady Rock of Japan' was about 'blah blah etc...'


Outside the club, Sendoh and Hanagata stood waiting for their carriages to be fetched as they put on their heavy coats and pulled on their gloves.

You said from 15th century to 19th? That's a very long range and so far I've been getting more 17th/18th century with a hint of James Bond (as played by Sendoh). The term 'club' threw me. I'm not sure but didn't bachaelors Societies have an alternative term? Tavern, Drink House, the 'Establishment'. Or maybe a simple name like 'The Broken Tusk'.

As for the 'secret club'. I'm thinking that it would be more Secret Society and Revelries than 'Secret Club'. I kept thinking 2nd grade boys and their secret tree house with a 'No Girls' sign pasted across the door.