Well...

dun understand why you want beta-ing... =P
Nice build up throughout the prologue, the constant reference to 'the stink' had me holding my breath (in empathy, of course). Ooh, the tension.

Wasn't too long either, but yeh, it's the prologue. (I dunno, ADD,me)

Bit that I don't understand: '... but it had been a wide lapel.'
What had been a white lapel? *with?

Go on then, what comes next?

If ya dun mind me saying, it's like that Stephen King boogieman story, but that's just me.