Jeg kan kanskje starte med noe som ikke skal følges opp:
KISS burde legge maska på hylla og gi verden en siste tur uten make up men med alle som har vært med i KISS som deltakere iløpet av showet.
Rolling Stones kan holde på til de stuper, men KISS burde ta sideflesket og gi seg mens leken er god
Satan for noen byger som rævkjører meg i dag.
Ringte jeg deg på lørdag,Kaasa?
Jo mere vanning dess mindre salt blir pinnekjøttet,Lasse.
(Det er vanlig å har'e liggende i vann over natta,
men jeg trure speller inn om kjøttet er røyka eller ikke)
"Jo mere vanning dess mindre salt blir pinnekjøttet,Lasse.
(Det er vanlig å har'e liggende i vann over natta,
men jeg trure speller inn om kjøttet er røyka eller ikke"
Why the fuck do you go off talking about me behind my back, all over my head?
What people?
What people? didn't you think I was gonna find out?
I have no idea about what you talking about nick. I just told Andy Stone that you bringing alot of heat om me and that is a problem.
Bullshitt! You don't need your fucking tv shows, or your fucking country clubs or your fucking casionos, I got calls from back home every fucking day and they think you're lost your fucking mind! Listen up here you jude motherfucker jude don't ever go on behind my back again, mother fucker jude.
Thank you.. I have been called bad before, people say I do things that are not correct to do, I dont believe in such talk.. I'am a nice man, with happy feelings.. ALL OF THE TIME.. First a joke, what do you get when you cross an owel with a bungicorp? My ass. Niyah Niyah!
Idag gikk jeg på snørra så det sang to ganger i halv seks tia på vei ned til Ski. Speilblank is, gatelys som ikke står på og sneakers er blitt endel av en brutal hverdag. Vuderer derfor å stille med brådder i mårra tidlig...
Dere ække aleine om å irritere dere grenseløst over alle
som inntar museskritt-gange bare det er hvitt på bakken
og dermed forsinker alle vårs som vil kjapt hjem på sofan.
"Dette finner jeg meg ikke i",sa Jorun og skrev under, før hun marsjerte ut bakdøra. "Hva faen!" skrek Petter. "Hogg hodet av ham, for pokker!", sa han fortvilet.
Faen som jeg hater slike tråder!! Så idiotisk!! Spesielt de røde.. De som er litt tykkere enn de grønne. Du vet.. Altså bortsett fra andre fiskeboller da. Det blir liksom så meningsløst når de røde trådene blander seg med de blå. Det blir jo bare kaos. Og de gule blir jo for korte til å ta vare på. Nei.. Takke meg til sorte tråder. De er så mye greiere etter man har tullet dem bort. Det er ikke bare-bare å leke leverpostei, som reven sa til kjerringa før bjørnen ble skutt..
Alex: Ja.. Du skjønner, vi sjekka ut når det gamle ska-bandet The Pioneers hadde sist copyright på navnet, og det var i '04, så vi tar ingen sjanser.. Men vi tenker at vi burde ha Pioneers i navnet. Noe mellom The og Pioneers. Vi får se hva vi gjør.
+15°C / 59°F
This is as warm as it gets in Norway, so we'll start here.
People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves.
The Norwegians are out in the sun, getting a tan.
+10°C / 50°F
The French are trying in vain to start their central heating.
The Norwegians plant flowers in their gardens.
+5°C / 41°F
Italian cars won't start.
The Norwegians are cruising in cabriolets.
0°C / 32°F
Distilled water freezes.
The water in Oslo Fjord gets a little thicker.
-5°C / 23°F
People in California almost freeze to death.
The Norwegians have their final barbeque before winter.
-10°C / 14°F
The Brits start the heat in their houses.
The Norwegians start using long sleeves.
-20°C / -4°F
The Aussies flee from Mallorca.
The Norwegians end their Midsummer celebrations.
Autumn is here.
-30°C / -22°F
People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth.
The Norwegians start drying their laundry indoors.
-40°C / -40°F
Paris start cracking in the cold.
The Norwegians stand in line at the hotdog stands.
-50°C / -58°F
Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole.
The Norwegian army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.
-70°C / -94°F
The false Santa moves south.
The Norwegian army goes out on winter survival training.
-183°C / -297.4°F
Microbes in food don't survive.
The Norwegian cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.
-273°C / -459.4°F
ALL atom-based movent halts.
The Norwegians start saying "Det er kaldt ute i dag" - "It's cold outside today."
-300°C / -508°F
Hell freezes over.
Norway wins the Eurovision Song Contest.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.
Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.
Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was
finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris was known to eat 3 meals a day!.... well he was pretty normal when it came to eating, his meals consisted of aborted fetuses and female goats milk.
The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris-more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris-robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.
It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.
Kan ikke Deli kle seg ut som en polkagris med et rødt eple i munnen og legge seg på et SVÆRT fat som vi får smidd, og så kan han utstilles til neste års Julepreik.
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Værstingen i andre klasse var frekke Pelle, som hadde skrevet fitte på tavla da den nye lærerinnen kom inn i klasserommet. Rød i ansiktet av vrede dro hun Pelle i øret og beordret: "Etter skolen skal du skrive det stygge ordet 50 ganger på tavla ,og slikke det av igjen"!
Mye senere på ettermiddagen kom Pelle hjem, kritthvit i ansiktet."Oj" sa pappa, "så hvit du var i ansiktet". "Det hadde du også vært om du hadde slikket fitte 50 ganger på en ettermiddag"!
Det var en gang en og ei som hadde det veldig sammen. Men da en dag med en annen , så ble veldig . Han trodde at han og hadde det sammen, men nå skjønte han at han hadde vært dum. prøvde å vinne tilbake, men var altfor av sin oppførsel. Da ble til slutt veldig , for hun ville jo ikke egentlig ha . Nå hadde hun ødelagt alt, og fikk ingen av dem: hverken eller .....
. Han trodde at han og