"I believe life is this big circle that we must travel alone from the beginning to the end until we begin again and again. While I believe in God I do see him as my ruler but as one that helps around the maze I must travel in as I walk in this world of flesh until the moment I live in the spirit realm what even it might be."
I'm not sure of what you mean here, Roy. If you mean reincarnation, or a person dying and living again in a human body, that is NOT a Christian doctrine. According to scripture, a person lives and dies one time in Earth, and then lives either in Heaven or Hell. Scripture shows that Jesus returns from Heaven, and Moses and Elijah returned very briefly at the Mount of Transfiguration, but no one else that I know of returns to Earth from either Heaven or Hell.
And, God is your helper through the maze, but he also is your Lord.
"Lets say God is love like the good book written in my heart tells me....."
The Bible should be written in your heart, but first it is written on paper, God's Word given to us; you should make sure that the book in your heart is the same as the Book of God's Word.
"Today I have the understanding alone with the forgiveness needed to forgive them putting it in the past as if it never happen in the first place."
Forgiving others is one of the most important things Christians are asked by our Lord to do. Forgiving someone so that it's put in the past as if it never happened in the first place is very difficult, but it must have been difficult for Christ to go up on his Cross also. Pray that Christ strengthens you to continue forgiving and forgiving.
In faith, Dave
We are not the vine; we are branches only.