I am so depressed. I just want to cut away at myself. I just can't fight the darkness anymore. I feel like my whole life sucks and if I didn't have critters to take care of I would check out. Life has not been kind to me and I keep trying. I keep getting back up to fight the good fight and life just sucks. All I really have to look forward to is getting older, lonelier and sicker. I wouldn't kill myself for many reasons but I am not opposed to playing to sharp objects. The pull is very strong. Thanks for letting me vent.

I know you said you were just venting, but I don't think you would have posted that unless you were looking for help. Unfortunately, I don't think anyone here can give you the kind of help you really need. I suggest calling a few places and see if there is someone you can talk to... here is a number of a hotline I found that does a number of general counseling things, and can help point you in the right direction - 1.800.448.3000.

There is no reason to feel like that for a long period of time. We all get blue or have bad days, but if you are really depressed please let someone help you so you don't have to suffer like that. It's treatable.

If you don't feel comfortable talking to a live person, here is an email form you can use:http://www.parenting.org/hotline/emailus.asp

Talking about it instead of hurting yourself is a step in the right direction. Hope my post didn't sound like I was criticizing in any way.

Hey, I know how you feel. I've been there - got the scars to prove it. It won't fix anything. So, you cut yourself up a little, feel as bad on the outside as you do on the inside. Then you're hiding it from people who don't get it. And in the long run you are more alone than you were.
I went to therapy. Didn't help, I lied the whole time. I had to decide to be happy. Fuck you, world. You can't bring me down. I had to look at my situation and CHOOSE to make myself happy.
I'm not trying to make it sound easy - it wasn't
But it's possible.

((((anon))))

Just to clarify - I'm not saying talking to someone won't help. By all means, call the number ginny offered and get some help. Ultimately you have to invest in yourself and your own happiness. Talking to someone may help you to understand how.

Very sorry to read this. This board is here for you.

Bestest of good vibes to ya.

Tomorrow is a new day...

Sounding like a giant suck-up here, but I just wanted to say that tOdd really strikes me as a genuine, warm-hearted guy. Good on you for being so supportive of all the folks here!

And good vibes to you, other anon. Please, get some help..there's no shame in that.

I'm sorry to hear this anon as well.

I also know that there are online chat sites that could provide the middle ground between email and phone.

This is one I found, though it seems like there are others...

http://www.depressionhaven.org/phpBB2/index.php

((anon))

Anon--do call the number Ginny posted, or find another like it. Things will get better. Best wishes to you.

I am sending angels to you, and am praying for you, anon.

You are not alone . . . many people go through periods of despair and loneliness & depression. There are people who can help you. Don't be afraid to reach out.

I'd like to keep this thread current.

How are you doing today, Anon? I know some people may think this is a generating thread, but in the event that it is not, let's keep an open dialogue. Is today better than yesterday? What good things happened today? Anything pissed you off you want to get off your chest? Let'[s get it out there!

I've told you guys many times how this place is kind of a dot family to me. I get to know you as much as you will allow, and I come to care for you. If one of our herd is hurting, I want to help. I want you to know someone genuinely cares.

And I'm still hot for Ronnie. Ronnie, you need to post more, so I can virtually have you in sordid ways.

I hope that didn't take away from my care for the OP.

I'll make a deal with you. I seem to be the resident Depressive around here, so the deal is: You keep going, I'll keep going.

I swear up and down that I'm not the OP here, and besides the cutting part, this is like reading my feelings word for word.

One step at a time, one breath at a time. Have faith that someday it will all make sense.



Why must you be the screen door on my submarine?

Ya know, Ruby, you never struck me as depressive. You seem to have an upbeat outlook on things no matter what shit is coming down the pike. It'll turn up roses for you sooner than later!

Seriously, how you doing? Okay, or stuff to bitch about?

Thanks for keeping the line of communication open for me. I am feeling better this evening. Thank you all very, very much for the support. I suffer from severe depression at times cutting myself is a release for me. I did not do this last night. I do have therapist and a shrink but sometimes that just doesn't matter. I look at the shit that is my life and I get tired of it. Too many losses. But I really feel that because I was able to come here last night and tell how I feeling I felt better. So thanks for this board and you guys. I would love to so to speak come out the closet but of course I feel ashamed. But I love you.

So here's how you start. We don't know who you are. Make up a name for yourself. liks Cut dude or whatever. We talk. Maybe you want to talk as a different persona. Coo welcome, Fermeriya! Whoiever you are, were, are will be, we welcome you.

Frankly, that doesn't look like it makes much sense. Sorry.

Glad to hear you're feeling better anon

I heart this board.

And anon, please, there is more than only one therapist out there, more than one type of med. Keep going, keep seeking.

Keep posting here if you need to vent or chat. We'll be here to try and help.

Lizzlee, were you drunk last night? Not judging, just wondering.


Anon, I don't know if you're a regular poster here or not. It doesn't matter. You have tons of support and love coming your way from this board. Take care of yourself. Don't let The Man bring you down.

It sure looks like it, doesn't it? I didn't think so, but maybe I was +1 glass of wine to the tipsy side!

Still, I meant what I tried to say.

I thought about Anon a lot yesterday & last night. I looked at this thread again last night and saw Ruby's post.
If there's anything I can do to help, I am here and willing. It's amazing how one can care about strangers on a message board.

I agree Lisa, it is amazing.

Bumping this thread again to let Anon know their words have been read by yet another Board Member who is wishing them well and thinking good thoughts for them.

Not to join the support party late, but truly good thoughts and vibes for everyone who is going through tough times. It's cliche and all but hang in there and focus on the positive. Even if the only positive you can find is that you have your health.

Whoever said it in this thread (sorry, I forgot) it's amazing how much you can care about your imaginary friends on the internet, but know you are cared about.