Hello Debbie,
Thanks for your reply. I think our system is anti homeschooling as well, but I have read so much on homeschooling that I am convinced that the school system isnt for my son as they cant cope with children outside the 'norm'. Now, as for homeschooling, we are at the beginning of a journey, and as we all know, most journeys are uncertain, who knows the outcome. I only know that the past 4 years have been hell.
The deschooling can take any form really. I am not keeping my son UP to the imposed standards as in school. I have opted out of their system, by deregistering him from the state school. I do however need to educate HIM to go out into the world armed with confidence and knowledge. If he gains confidence along our journey, he may well feel able to return to a learning situation where there are other people. But bullying has taken its toll, and I have my doubts.
I know that the frustrations have slowly dispelled, and trust has returned between us. I dont suppose we can imagine what it is like to be a child again, to be sent somewhere for 6 hours a day, with no escape, with perhaps, other children who dont like us, or bully us, or just dont want to play with us. We seem to listen to adults who tell stories of their good/bad childhood, but we dont seem to listen to our child/children now, today, at this moment regarding their doubts, insecurities and unhappiness. Well the lesson I have learnt over the past 4 years is that listening to the various people at school got us nowhere, listening to my son EVENTUALLY got us back together trusting our instincts. Yes he has become a little clingy. And no he doesnt see many children of his age, but we are about to enquire into joining a homeschooling group a few miles away who meet regularly. We needed this 'time-out' from generated situations.
His writing and reading is well down the scale. His humour has zoomed, but I dont measure him as a human being by his successes or failures like I used to on the school/learning scale. I did talk AT HIM to begin with, like a teacher would at a class. Now I mainly LISTEN. For instance, I thought it would be 'educational' to take him on a trip tomorrow on a coach to a cheesemaking place in Cheddar, England. (HE HATES CHEESE!!) I booked the tickets and enforced my thinking on him that it would be 'good for him' and I would quite like the trip too!! However, the minute I told him, things started going wrong, and unlike your daughter, who might become erruptive, my son starts feeling ill, going weepy and I wondered what on earth was wrong. Then I put 2 and 2 together, told him we werent going and ASKED HIM if he would like to choose somewhere he might be interested (apart from amusement parks!!) He said he would like to find a stretch of beach with sand so that he could draw a big picture (art is NOT his thing). So who am I to question his 'learning'. Anyway, I am learning about 'learning' all the time.
You said about working. Do you have family/good friend who could care for your daughter. The wonderful thing about homeschooling is that it can take place anywhere, anytime. My son is more an evening kind of guy, so we dont start anything of any substance till way into the afternoon. I however was more inclined to 'want to get it over with' first thing in the morning, until I read that learning is a 24/7 educational curve. 'School' at home does not need to take more than between 1-4 hours per day. Watching educational tv programmes, finding out stuff on the internet, a bit of writing/reading, helping me bake, shopping. It is ALL educational.
I HOPE this helps.
good luck
sonia aka kaoskat in UK