It was morning. The birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and overall it was a thrillingly stereotypical California day. Fenella opened her window and looked at the beautiful day smiling down on her. Then she screamed and jumped out the apartment window.
Normally, this would have been a terribly stupid thing for someone to do. In fact, Fenella would not have done it at all except for two things: 1) her front door was stuck shut and 2) she lived on the bottom floor.
The truth is, the stupidest thing Fenella had done that day was not jumping out her bedroom window. It was getting out of bed in the first place.
So there you have it. I would love any comments. The only problem I'm having is where to go from here!
Well, Fenella should have stayed in bed because she had forgotton it was Sunday, and she didn't have to go to work.
In fact she would have kicked herself, but unfortunately, had got her left foot caught up in the curtain as she jumped out of the window.
'Wow this is sooo stupid' she thought, hopping on one foot as she tried to disentangle herself from the curtain. Her scream had attracted the attention of her next door neighbour, who had opened up his own window to investigate the cause of the commotion.
Tony opened his mouth to yell at Fenella, when he was suddenly struck dumb by the sight of a beautiful girl with her foot stuck in a bedroom curtain. 'Hey, you look in a bit of a mess there, I'll just get some clothes on and come and give you a hand.'
Fenella turned at the sound of his voice, and her mouth flew open in surprise! This had to be one of the most handsome men she had ever seen in her life.
She turned, smiling, and the curtain gave way, tearing rapidly from it's top, to the bottom, and deposited Fenella in a heap on the floor..........
The truth is, the stupidest thing Fenella had done that day was not jumping out her bedroom window. It was getting out of bed in the first place.
Her bed, you see, enabled her to travel through time. However on the bed she was a prisoner, a prisoner unable to leave the bed. Her days were spent wandering through time as a passenger, a distant viewer, never able to interact with that of which she saw. Now that Fenella has left the bed, she was trapped. Trapped in a world of stuck doors and smiling days. A world new to her. Can she find someone to teach her these thing. The ways of smiling days? Will she find her way back to the bed? The bed that soon disappeared after she left it. A bed now trapped in a world unknow to her. Where would she find it. How would she begin to look?
After hitting the ground, she got up, Brushed herself off, and began the jouney of discovery and quest. A quest to find that bed that imprisoned her. The bed which is her only means to find her way home.
.. and welcome!
That is a good opening but I have a couple of questions.
1. Thrillingly Stereotypical? I always thought part of the aura of thrills were their individualism .. even in California
but more curiouser,
2. Why does she scream? being on the ground floor ... or is the scream part of the "strange thing to do" question? .. if so, scrub 2
Did you want suggestions for continuing or just comments?
but even more urgently ..
.. are you stuck with that game save stopping you progress?
1. Well, I put thrillingly stereotypical just because I thought it sounded good and it was kind of ironic. You know, just because stereotypes are NOT thrilling.
2. She screams because she is angry at the world, not because she was scared or anything like that.
And I'm willing to accept anything you care to share. I liked everyone's ideas. I'm not sure what I'll do yet. If anyone else has questions or critiques (?) I'd love to hear them! If I write more soon, I'll put it up. Also, I was kind of looking for a name, I just put Fenella in there as a placeholder, so if you can come up with a good name, I'd be much obliged.
OK Hi, I'm new here, but I was just wondering if I could post a story beginning on here for you guys to read and tell me what you think of it.
No Problem, just start.... 
greetz Ed 
