When I was a young minister, a funeral director asked me to hold a grave side service for a homeless man with no family or friends. The funeral was to be at a cemetery way out in the country. This was a new cemetery and this man was the first to be laid to rest there.

I was not familiar with the area and became lost. Being a typical man, of course, I did not ask for directions. I finally found the cemetery about an hour late. The back hoe was there and the crew was eating their lunch. The hearse was nowhere to be seen.

I apologized to the workers for being late. As I looked into the open grave, I saw the vault lid already in place. I told the workers I would not keep them long, but that this was the proper thing to do. The workers, still eating their lunch, gathered around the opening.

I was young and enthusiastic and poured out my heart and soul as I preached. The workers joined in with, "Praise the Lord," "Amen," and "Glory!" I got so into the service that I preached and preached and preached, from Genesis to The Revelation.

When the service was over, I said a prayer and walked to my car. As I opened the door, I heard one of the workers say, "I never saw anything like that before and I've been putting in septic systems for twenty years."

LOL...

Typical man. My husband won't ask for directions either. He always assumes that if we are going in the right direction, that we will end up where we need to be...sigh...
If only life were that simple.

Sounds like a job for Joe the Plumber. I work for him now. Well, actually I work for all the American people, but Joe pays me $5.00 an hour!

Oh, before I forget, Pete wanted me to tell you that real men never ask for directions. For instance, if Moses was a woman, the Jews would have found the promised land in a couple of days instead of 40 years and where's all the old fashion suffering and drama that makes for a good Bible story in that scenario?

Did you ever notice that those same people never read instruction manuals before assembling stuff? And, they never worry about the nuts and bolts that are left over.

IT SOUNDS LIKE THE HOLISTIC WAY OF GETTING DIRECTIONS. ACCORDING TO DIRK GENTLY'S HOLISTIC DETECTIVE AGENCY ~ =0 Dirk Gently told how he gets directions. He simply follows someone who looks like they know where thy are going. As he pointed out ~ It may not get me where I am going,but it will get me where I need to be. Svlad Cjelli) is the lead character in two of DouglasAdams' novels ...http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?DirkGentlyNavigationMethod scientific stuff: Zen NavigationA methodology with a tremendous propensity to get lost during a hike from A to B . Zen Navigation simply consists of finding something that looks as if it ...http://sciencity.blogspot.com/2005/12/zen-navigation.html The Ultra-Complete Index to Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective AgencyDead March I:4/24. dead pig wrestling technique II:28/219. deep-searched I:21/ 159. ..... red paper II:1/3. navigation technique, Dirk's II:4/29x;13/121. ..... "Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency" and "The Long Dark Tea-Time of the ...http://www.zootle.net/afda/faq/guide2.shtml Watch out for the "Zen" Navigation method and the Great Zaganza's horoscope column: they'll ...Jul 26, 2008 ... Douglas Adams's Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency always reminds me of one .... I also love the "follow someone" method of navigation, ...http://www.tor.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=blog&id=2016 DIRK GENTLY'S HOLISTIC... in ( especially when driving, even using the Holistic System Of Navigation). ...http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/dirkgently/production_notes_2008.shtml Reminds me while on vacation a friend was trying to finda place to eat but could not find one. Being arround noon he decided to follow a guy in a suit. After several blocks the guy turned arround and asked if he was following him, and why. My friend told him he was visiting the area and was hungry but could not find a place to eat. He said he felt that if he followed someone who looked like they knew where they were going at noon he would find some place to eat. The guy in the suit bought him dinner. The Holistic Way of finding directions seems to work when trying to get some where and makes getting there an adventure. For example while in Portugal on a Pilgrimage to the ShrineOf OurLady Of Fatima I followed some Portugese Pilgrims I did not know walking with many others along the road into Fatima. Though we couldnt understand each other I went with them. I ended up in a park where lots of great food was being served to all the Pilgrims who had walked to Fatima from all over Portugal for the Festival Of Our Lady Of Fatima. I was the only tourist from outside Portugal there and I found it by following some people who looked like they knew where they were going. AHO. You are never lost if you know how to survive. Just a mite bit bewildered. When you have eliminated the impossible then whatever remains no matter how improbable must be the answer. Sherlock Holmes There some times may be other reasons for things you do that you may not necessarily be aware of. Dirk Gently.

Timeloyd Rich GALACTIC PICNIC INFRO. AND GALACTIC ORDER OF TOWELERS GalacticPicnic@RespectThePlanet.comMSN MESSENGER Buddy List ~ Timeloyd@webtv.net Taimm@webtv.net [_-_}+ http://community.webtv.net/Taimloyd/FORAGINGTHEEDIBLE http://community.webtv.net/Taimloyd/SMUDGINGCEREMONY HAVE A FANTASTIC AND MARVELOUSLY SHININ YEAR REMEMBER WHERE YOUR TOWEL IS DNA4FR IS [o__} : : : : http://community.webtv.net/Timeloyd/GALACTICHITCHHIKER REMEMBER WHERE YOUR TOWEL IS DNA4FR

You are a traveling man, and it sounds like you enjoyed each step of the way. Good for you!

Why just today I replaced the tile from the master bedroom into the bathroom.

The Universe

- Because if you can't laugh at yourself... someone else will.

I always say that laughter keeps us sane and healthy, and if you get new tile in your bathroom at the same time..well, that's a bonus!