Rowan had trouble paying attention to what Darlanta was telling him, but he forced his mind to focus anyway. He noticed absently that she had very nearly given up on trying to seduce him, which was something of a relief. Poor creature—she was just lonely, and normally he would consider it his duty to liven things up for her a bit, but at the moment, his heart just wasn’t in it.
“Maybe it would be best if you spoke to my sister,” he said, giving her a somewhat befuddled look. It was her third time trying to explain the necessary procedures for the spell which would allow a person to travel from one world to another.
Darlanta opened her mouth for a second, then closed it again, smiling. “Perhaps you are right,” she agreed. “I rarely leave my grove, but I should like to correspond with another practitioner of earth magic. Where does she live?”
“She owns a shoppe in Bizmar,” he replied, “And lives there, too.”
Darlanta’s eyes widened as though she had just received news on the death of a beloved friend, rather than the address of a woman she’d never met. “The city! How distressing! She must be very unhappy.”
“She is quite happy,” he assured her. “She has a very open mind. Quite unlike myself.”
Darlanta smiled coyly. “I’m sure I couldn’t agree. You are very humble for an elf, I must say.”
He smiled back at her, his old charming smile. “Ah, but I’m an otherworldly elf, yes? And that makes all the difference.”
There was a somewhat strained pause between them, then, as if something should have occurred but didn’t. Darlanta looked disappointed and looked away. Rowan noticed the lines on her sun-kissed features for the first time and for once did not think that being older made a woman look more distinguished, and hence more attractive.
“Will you and your friends be staying for the night?” Darlanta asked suddenly. “I have room in my cabin if some do not wish to sleep outside.”
It was a last ditch effort, and they both knew it. He almost pitied her.
“My friends will spend the night, yes, but I will not. I plan to leave shortly.”
He realized the decision had been made the second the words were out of his mouth. Since speaking with Soran, his whole desire to complete this mission had simply vanished. He couldn’t imagine having to spend several more days and nights with the boy and have to deal with the mixed feelings brewing between them. But as he had been raised to never, ever back out of a business deal—and, more importantly, to never, ever anger someone more powerful than himself—he would have to carry out the rest of the mission.
“So soon?” Darlanta’s surprised voice cut into his thoughts, bringing him back to the present. “But you have only just arrived. Your horse will be too weary to continue. I cannot allow you to abuse her in such a way.”
Before he could open his mouth to argue the matter with her, she crossed the room and lifted a shiny red apple from the fruit basket in the middle of a small table. “Feed her this,” she said, handing it to him. It made his hand tingle pleasantly when it touched his skin. “She will be able to carry you throughout the night, but do not push her farther.”
He could do little more than give her a grateful nod and slip the apple into his pocket. “I would desire…if you would be so kind as to not tell the others about my leaving,” he somehow managed to say. He felt awkward on the inside, although he knew his voice sounded perfectly calm and composed.
She nodded, and after he wrote down Laurel’s proper address and handed it to her, he bid her goodnight before heading outside.
~*~*~*~*~
At the moment, Xue was having a staring contest with a young, golden-eyed wolf. She had disdained Jeremy’s offer of a swim, telling herself that she was simply more interested in meeting the inhabitants of the druid’s forest than engaging in foolish human frolicking. In truth, she did not make friends very well, and found Jeremy, Eremis, and Cas’s rambunctious actions in the water more than a little intimidating.
The wolf, just past his second winter from the looks of it, and being even more anti-social than herself, made for a sorry substitute. He was clearly the only wolf within miles and was very close to the druid’s heart—and vice versa.
“Darlanta,” he said, his hackles rising slightly. “Mine. Forest. Mine. Not yours. All mine.”
Xue growled and took a few stiff-legged steps toward him. “Foolish pup! My pack and I are only passing through. You may keep your druid and your forest.”
He whined and wagged his tail, cringing slightly in response. She sat down, satisfied, and suffered to allow him to creep forward and lick her muzzle. She had no doubt that she could beat him in a fight, but didn’t relish doing so. Wolves strutted and bullied one another all the time, but rarely did things ever boil down to an actual fight. It just wasn’t their way.
The sound of crushing brush and leaves had the young wolf suddenly bolting. Xue whirled around to regard Rowan, who was leading his horse away from the druidess’ clearing.
“You are leaving,” she said, morphing into her human shape and fixing him with her penetrating gaze.
“Yes,” he said simply. He nodded quickly, as if to reassure himself.
Xue sniffed at the air for a moment then frowned at him. “You are leaving us behind. You are leaving your mate behind.”
“Yes,” he said again. A sadness descended over his features, making her whine softly in her throat in sympathy.
“Xue,” he said carefully, “You must promise to take them back. Especially Soran. He and Cas are very inexperienced. I…want you to promise that you’ll watch over them for me.”
She growled lowly. “I’ve only just found you, and now you are leaving! You continue the hunt and leave me to watch the pups? Why, Rowan?”
He tried to smile but failed, shaking his head instead. “I’ll continue the hunt on my own. Don’t tell the others until tomorrow. Tell them…I went for a long walk to clear my head. That should be enough.”
When she said nothing more in protest, he nodded and turned to mount his horse. “Thanks,” he added, “I’ll be back, eventually. Ask Darlanta for Laurel and Daniel’s address. If I choose to sell the house in town, I’ll send word.” He nodded his head again and looked as if he might tip his head to her, but seemed to remember at the last minute that he wore not hat. “Farewell.”
She watched him ride quietly off into the gathering gloom of evening before turning and staring back in the direction of the clearing. He was, in her eyes, their leader, the alpha wolf, and she ought to obey him, but… She shook her head. She didn’t like this new alteration in the plan at all.
~*~*~*~*~
As he rode, Rowan tried to recall all the times he’d run away from someone or something and decided it was past counting. Now more than ever, he longed for his twin sister’s counsel, for her level head and steady heart were matured beyond her years. He, on the other hand, still thought and acted like a fifteen year old boy newly introduced to society.
For the first time in awhile, he could admit that his unhappiness was his own fault. He had been carelessly brought up, true, but Laurel had been his equal in all privileges, and she had turned out ten times better than he. His frivolous lifestyle he had never grown out of. His love for Merlin Ferntongue he had never quite gotten over, and he supposed it was to be the bane of his life.
Merlin’s quiet rejection of his affections had hurt immensely at the time, but it hadn’t really scarred him. The betrayal of his friend and subsequent death of his parents had soon followed, however, and the combined loss had put a strain on his already flighty emotions. He couldn’t bear to care for someone too deeply ever again, but at the same time he couldn’t stop himself from admiring and loving nearly everyone he became friends with. He saw the good and beauty in every man and woman. Yet as soon as he found himself becoming too attached to any particular person, he felt himself shying away.
This was the weak heart he’d told Soran about. It frightened him to think that he might be falling in love with the boy, just as his feelings had always frightened him. Some day he hoped to come to grips with his own troubled heart and be content to stay and grow to love one person. Ironically, despite his fickle ways—or maybe because of them—he knew he wasn’t the type to be alone forever. He longed to be taken care of by someone who loved him deeply, a someone he could in turn care for and love.
But he was miles and miles away from meeting that person and accepting him or her, or at least he thought as much. For now, he’d put as many miles between himself and Soran as possible, and so ease his own hurt feelings, feeling the burden on his shoulders getting lighter with each step Vixen took, carrying him farther and farther away from his troubles.
