I guess it's not to my credit to admit that I was suspicious from the get-go. But under stress, I just couldn't come up with a good way to let her down.
I was just thinking about the few times when other ppl have asked me for money, and both times, we were at work in our own towns, not out of town, and we weren't strangers. I felt those ppl had other resources nearby.
I really wasn't worried about what she would think of me since I knew I wouldn't see her again. I genuinely wrestled with my own conscience (could I walk away from a colleague in NYC who had no cash and no credit? And the no-credit part might have been partly my fault, b/c I was the one who said she should use the ATM. Her card did work again after I insisted that she call to get the block lifted, but she still couldn't get cash).
And like Ariadne said, it was hectic and stressful. I do see how your situation was very similar, being out of town.
She said her own cell phone had been stolen, so she was using her df's cell. This seemed plausible, b/c when I would call her, if she didn't answer, her mailbox was too full to receive new vm's, and she said she didn't have the code to clear it. Her parents are elderly. Her dm has Alzheimer's. She says.
This workshop is open to adjuncts, and we get there on a wing and a prayer. Even some of the f/t faculty didn't stay in budget, b/c I asked. I made only $11k last year as an adjunct. She probably didn't make a lot more. The $600 housing fee is deducted from our stipend. She lives close enough to take a train for $80 or less, each way. (I looked at train fares from DC before I bought my plane ticket.)
I think if this happens again, I'll just say that I'm overdrawn, but I'd sure love to have a line or an attitude that says, "Don't even ask!"
Keiki's Makuahine (Keiki's Mom) 51, dh 52
Keiki: b. 2002 after 3 months bedrest
Natural conception following ZIFT/chem. pg
Olivia: b. 1999 d. 1999
28-week preemie, ptl cause unknown
Natural conception after 1 mc
ttc since 1998