One of the simplest and most effective techniques kids can use to break away from angry feelings is "distraction." Distraction works by substituting either funny or happy memories when kids are angry. It's best if you pick the scene the child is going to substitute prior to getting angry. Spend some time helping the child think of either the funniest or happiest event in their life. Once they have selected the scene, practice switching to this scene at times when the child is NOT angry. It's important to practice this a few times prior to using it when the child is angry. Then when the real anger does occur, kids have a better chance of being able to distract themselves away from the anger producing thoughts to the distraction scene. Give it a try and let us know how it worked.

Jerry

I read about your 'distraction' idea both on the website and your 'hot stuff' book which was given to me by a woman at school who tries to help me control my anger. I think its a really good idea. I have tried it a few times when i wasn't angry so that when i WAS angry i would think staright to that 'funny/happy time', but for ME it didn't work. Everytime i got angry with someone the last thing i thought about was to 'distract' myself and think of a good or funny time, i just ended up shouting at them about what ever we were arguing about! Can you help me at all? Give me any other ideas or techniques?

Danni,

You had a really good idea to try to practice your distraction scene prior to the time when you're getting angry. My advice would be to practice switching to your scene everyday for several days (like a week or two). Then have a friend help you conduct a little experiment. Tell your friend to say things to try to get you angry and your job will be to use your relaxation scene. That's a good way to practice for the "real thing." Find a friend to give you some help and let us know how you do. Good luck!

Jerry