Brian of Nottinghamshire Community. Captain of the Team and old-style dribbler who nevertheless has scored over five hundred goals in a long and distinguished career. A joy to watch on the right wing. (Black shirt).
American Way. Purveyor of surrealism who has played for both sides in his time, but is sure to be beavering on down with the winning team on the big day.
Kiwi K. More at home in a rugby scrum than on the soccer pitch, he cannot be surpassed when picking up loose balls. Likely to attack the opposition with diagrams.
Doctor Alan. SCP's exciting number 3.489723 shirt. His ability to spot an ineligible player on the turf is legendary.
Doctor D. Once known as "the wizard of the weave", now in semi-retirement but could make a come-back at any moment.
Bob T. Like his fellow citizen, American Way, has played for both sides previously. Participation in the tournament doubtful as he is on a roof somewhere between Chicago and Missouri.
World Wide Travelling Traveller. Former Dulwich Hamlet supporter. Will miss the kick-off as he is still travelling.
Doctor Jenny Massage-Table Community.
Renee the Paddle. Writer of Erotica.
The Rhythm Sisters.
Delia Smith. Cheerleader, who having drunk a bottle of cooking sherry, encouraged East Grinstead Wanderers with, "Come on, Arsenal City Rovers! Let's be 'avin' yer!"
Jetta. God, I miss her!
The SCP squad is looking forward to competing against teams whose players have not scored own goals or been sent off.