Our members in Sussex will recognise the following lyric, written by a dear, dear friend of mine. It is sung to the tune of ‘I Heard it on the Grapevine’.

I guess you wonder how I know
There is a jumble sale in Piddinghoe,
And Mr. Brown from Tidy Street
Is riding a bike from there to Mozambique.
It took me by surprise, I must say,
When my cat died yesterday.
How do I know?
I read it in the Argus.


The Argus prints some amazing stories. The first one appears below. There will, no doubt, be more in the future.

An 81-year-old former Navy officer found dead in a suburban bondage parlour has been described as a "kind, caring, distinguished gentleman."
Paramedics found David Cecil Pelly's body at a house in a quiet street in Portslade, where the attic has been converted into a torture chamber.
Mr Pelly was dressed head-to-toe in rubber.
His widow, Angela, was last night being comforted by relatives as she came to terms with the circumstances of his death.
People in the leafy cul-de-sac where the elderly couple shared a luxury detached home in Fernhurst, near Midhurst, spoke of their shock and sadness.
Mr Pelly had lived in the quiet close for the six years since the house was built and was on good terms with neighbours.
One said: "I believe he served in the Navy for some part of his life and fought in the Second World War. I often used to see him walking up the drive and he would always say hello.
"It was a terrible shock to learn how he had died."
Mr Pelly is believed to have visited the fetish parlour two or three times a year.
Police yesterday confirmed they were not treating his death as suspicious.
People living in St Andrew's Road, Portslade, said the attic room of the terraced house had been converted into a fetish room with clients visiting day and night.
A shuttered window in the loft was left open to signal when the dungeon was open for business.
The owner, a middle-aged woman, has not been seen at the property since Mr Pelly's death on Tuesday.
She raised the alarm at 6pm when she realised he had stopped breathing.
Police have no plans to question her in connection with the death. A post-mortem examination was held yesterday.
Brighton and Hove coroner Veronica Hamilton-Deeley said it was unlikely an inquest would be held.

A man seen sexually assaulting two horses as they grazed at an animal sanctuary is being hunted by police.
Children enjoying the summer sun with their families during the school holidays were just yards away when the pervert struck. He was seen carrying out the attacks by a stunned dog walker and the horses' owner was alerted. Details of the assaults are too shocking to be published.
The culprit had wandered into a field at the stables of Retreat Horse Rescue in Portslade.
Annie Taylor, who runs the centre with her husband Terry, was so disgusted and upset by the attack that she called the police. She said: "You have to be pretty sick to do this sort of thing. I think this is quite serious because there were children around. The police need to look into it.
"The two horses he went for were placid. One was a gelding, the other a mare, but he could have been attacked if he'd gone for the Arab or one of the youngsters.
"When the dog walker phoned here I answered but he said he wanted to talk to my husband. He spoke to me first of all but didn't want to discuss it with me because of what he saw the man doing."
The witness, who had been visiting his mother in the village, took a detailed description of the attacker who was said to have been dressed in a distinctive manner. The details have been passed to police. He contacted Mrs Taylor three days later after tracing her phone number and, after receiving the call, her husband and daughter searched Portslade village with the description but the offender could not be found.
Mrs Taylor, who started the sanctuary in 1992 which relies upon donations and fund-raising to meet running costs, said she received another report of the same man climbing over a wall at the stables six days later.
It is not known if he managed to attack the horses again but police have once again been informed. A spokesman for Sussex Police said the man would be prosecuted for animal cruelty if arrested.

Were corporal punishment still allowed in schools, this old boot would have spent some of the missing £500,000 on canes.Here follows the report from the Argus:

Ex-pupil wants headteacher to go to jail
by our news team

A teenager has called for her tyrannical former headteacher to be jailed for living a life of luxury on stolen school funds.
Kathryn Jones, 17, said former nun Colleen McCabe had let the school go to rack and ruin while she fleeced it of £500,000. Kathryn, from Crawley, was among more than 30 former pupils of St John Rigby College in West Wickham, south London, who went to Southwark Crown Court to see their former principal sentenced. But they were left frustrated when the 50-year-old failed to appear. At first it was thought McCabe had gone on the run but she had been at her Kent home and was last night in hospital after complaining of chest pains. Police were waiting to take her into custody once treatment had finished.
Kathryn said: "I am very angry she hasn't turned up but she will get her comeuppance. "I think she should get a long time in jail for it. "She was a Mafia-type figure who ran the school tyrannically. Even the teachers were scared of her. She was a very overpowering woman."
Kathryn said the Roman Catholic school had fallen into disrepair during McCabe's time in charge. "Once we were having a lesson in the drama theatre and a rat ran across the floor," she said.
McCabe spent 15 years as a nun with the Sisters of Charity of St Vincent de Paul before deciding to become a teacher. She became principal of St John's in 1991 and later embarked on a five-year spending spree, splashing out on sunshine holidays, luxury cars, designer clothes and trips on the Orient Express while pupils were left without books or heating. Described by colleagues as a despot, she ran a regime that resulted in 26 teachers leaving in one year.
During her trial in July, the court heard her spending habits "would have made Imelda Marcos proud". Her love of footwear alone had cost £7,000. She used school funds for Gucci jewellery, West End theatre seats and holidays in Malta. Huge amounts were frittered away on furniture, electrical goods, designer clothes and cosmetics while she bought gifts for family and friends. Years of her lavish credit card sprees left the school lurching from one financial crisis to another, with a library of empty shelves and teachers and pupils having to clean the classrooms.
After yesterday's hearing one former teacher said: "It was absolutely hell working for her. It was hell on earth."

Film of Mzzzzzz McCabe was shown on the television news yesterday.

She looks like a baboon in drag.

The following report appeared in today’s Argus but it could also be an addition to the ‘Trains between Peckham and Worthing’ thread, entitled ‘Wrong kind of man on the line’.


Man sat on rail lines

by our news team

The case against a man convicted of sitting on railway lines has been adjourned.

John Holloway, 37, of Ditchling Road, Brighton, was found guilty of trespassing on a railway and sitting on the lines on May 10 this year.

He did not appear at Eastbourne Magistrates' Court yesterday. [Presumably because he was still sitting on the lines waiting for the delayed 17.01 South Central service to West Worthing, calling at Hove, Aldrington, Portslade etc.]

Holloway's case was adjourned until October 7 for psychiatric reports to be prepared [and a ticket for the 09.20 Virgin Cross Country service from Brighton to Liverpool, which would keep him out of trouble for at least ten days].

What a super story!

We need men like John Holloway, 37, contributing to this forum.

Dear Robin,

Please do not encourage John Holloway, 37, and Mzzz Browne, 14.

They are completely mad.

Miles

A dear, dear friend of mine has written a song about the ‘Argus’ to be sung to the tune of ‘YMCA’. Readers who, like the encyclopaedic squirrel, enjoy Max Bygraves style singalongs should go to

http://www.wu-wien.ac.at/usr/h95d/h9550023/midi/


then click on Village People - YMCA.mid, near the foot of the page, and burst forth with:


Argus!
It’s the guardian of truth
I said, “Argus!”
It’s never smutty or crude.
There’s no titties
Or shots of girls in the nude,
Just a picture of the vicar.

Headline -
‘ELVIS SPOTTED IN HOVE!’
Elvis
Is a Dalmatian dog.
Do you get it?
Elvis spotted in Hove.
There are loads of brilliant headlines
On the front of the

R G U S
What a paper! the
R G U S
It’s got all of the very latest local news
And ever single word of it’s true.
R G U S
It’s solid gospel! the
R G U S
No it don’t do sex and it don’t do smut
But the ads at the back have got whatever you want.
A R G U S

Thanks Gillian. Myself and the other girls in Brighton have been singing along to this and we have had such fun. I have written to you at the carl and mats address about more songs.

Your friend

Heather

This story does not come from the ‘Argus’, which, as the song says, is ‘the guardian of truth’, but I found it on the Brighton and Hove forum and would like to share it with you.


"Mr. Gorsky"

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon,
he not only gave his famous "one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind" statement, but followed it by several remarks, usual communication traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. He then said,

"Good luck Mr. Gorsky."

Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programmes. Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck Mr. Gorsky"
statement meant.

On July 5, 1995 in Tampa Bay FL, while answering questions following
a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. His friend hit a ball which landed in the front of his neighbour's bedroom window. His neighbours were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky. "Oral sex! You want oral sex?!

You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

If the above anecdote were true, it would be very funny indeed.

Sadly, the entire story is apocryphal.

Neil Armstrong made no reference to a Mr Gorsky at any time.

Also, he's never been anywhere near the moon and neither has any other human being.

The story has been debunked. See http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/blgorsky.htm

Surely this last post was made by someone wishing to discredit our valuable contributor Lotta.

Red Bank Sno Biz Operator Charged With Spanking Female Employees
November 8, 2004

Operator of the Tasty Flavors Sno Biz in Red Bank has been charged
with spanking female employees when they messed up on the job.

Red Bank Police charged Paul Eugene Levengood, of Cleveland, with two
counts of sexual battery.

The Tasty Flavors Sno Biz is on Dayton Boulevard.

One employee said when she was hired she was required to sign a paper
that said, "I give Gene permission to bust my behind any way he sees
fit."

A young female worker said she was put over his knee and spanked with
20 licks when she forgot to put a banana in a smoothie.

Levengood is free on $2,000 bond.

He is due in Red Bank City Court on Nov. 16 at 8:30 a.m.

A teacher who kissed a 15-year-old pupil has escaped jail.
But David Anderson's career is in ruins after a court heard he will never work with children again.
Anderson, 42, had been warned he faced being sent to prison for indecently assaulting the girl by kissing her.
The father-of-three, who is married to a doctor, had denied the offence but was found guilty at his trial in October.
He was given a 12-month prison sentence suspended for two years when he appeared at Hove Crown Court to be sentenced yesterday.
He kissed the girl after helping her with coursework she had lost at a Sussex school last year.
Anderson, of Rosemary Gardens, Burwash, near Heathfield, told her he fancied her and sent her text messages up to four times a night.
In one text he told her: "I am glad you can still taste me on your lips. I loved kissing you. Cannot wait until we meet again."
The girl replied: "I want to kiss you all the time. I could kiss you for days."
Anderson texted back: "I keep imagining being with you. It keeps me awake and keeps me daydreaming."
He was arrested after the girl, who cannot be named for legal reasons, confided in another teacher and a friend when she thought the relationship had gone too far.
The teenager, who gave evidence by video link, said she was shocked when Anderson kissed her.
She said: "He just bent forward and kissed me. The kiss lasted a second or two. I said it was really risky and he said he knew. He kept saying not to tell anyone or he could lose his job."
The girl said she had been to see Anderson twice a day and other students had started rumours they were going out.
She said: "There was no relationship, only a friendship.
"I reported it because it was wrong. I decided right after he kissed me."
During the trial he claimed it was the girl who had kissed him but he had not responded.
The court heard Anderson, now unemployed, had also been warned about sending texts to another girl.
Denis Bradley, defending, said: "He is a man who is getting on for his middle years and who is never ever going to be employed again in the future as a teacher.
"He has three young children and a wife who is in regular work providing for their family. There is no risk at all that he will ever be employed in teaching. Children are never going to be at risk again.
"The facts of this case are now so notoriously well known he would be a fool if he were ever to consider teaching children again. Here is a man who has learnt his lesson. One hopes the young girl concerned has suffered no lasting harm."
In addition to the suspended sentence Anderson was ordered to sign the sex offenders' register for ten years and was banned from working with children indefinitely.
He was also ordered to pay up to £3,000 towards prosecution and defence costs.
Judge Guy Anthony, sentencing him, said: "It is not unusual, as I said at your trial, to find a man who is attracted to young girls coming up to the age of 16.
"However, people in your position of trust simply have to control any such attractions you may feel.
"This was a vulnerable young girl needing extra care and attention.
"Clearly, from the text messages you were sending, you were embarking on a relationship with her that was completely inappropriate for someone who was supposed to be her teacher.
"The assault, a brief peck on the lips, is about as minor an indecent assault as it could possibly be.
"What makes this a serious case was that she was a young girl in your care.
"This was an enormous breach of trust, even if she did have some sort of crush on you."
At a previous hearing Anderson's wife, Dr Fiona Anderson, a GP, told the court she was standing by her husband.
Dr Anderson, a Sunday school teacher, said the couple, who have been together for 22 years, had a strong marriage despite his conviction.

We don’t get this sort-a stuff in Peacehaven. Sergeant Richard Siggs (£4.80 for 20) is my kind-a law enforcement officer. He’ll soon be runnin’ them card-leavers outta town.


Two suspected prostitutes were arrested when police traced more than 100 advertising cards to their address.
Brighton police stressed they were cracking down on antisocial littering of phone kiosks with explicit sex cards - not on prostitution.
The two women, in their 50s, were arrested on suspicion of managing a brothel and controlling prostitution for gain.
Both were freed on bail pending further inquiries.
Police have been warning brothels in the city for the past year to stop littering kiosks.
Sergeant Richard Siggs said: "We cannot condone prostitution but we are focusing on carding - that is what upsets people.
"Many cards are lewd and explicit and there have been a huge number of complaints recently from people, especially mothers with young children."
Officers on Thursday collected 235 cards from kiosks and, using the phone numbers supplied, traced 104 to the women's address in the Montpelier area of Brighton.
Police were continuing efforts to trace those responsible for the remaining cards.
They began warning offenders last summer by raiding brothels. More than 15,000 cards were found at one address and the operation netted 26,000 cards.
Four people were arrested including two women caught placing cards in kiosks and two found working at the brothel. Both were in possession of heroin and one was deported hours later as an illegal immigrant.
Mr Siggs said: "Our message is that we will arrest anyone planting cards in kiosks and the guilty could face up to a £1,000 fine or two years in prison.
"Brothels which use kiosks to advertise can expect a knock on the door from us. Their madams or owners could face prosecution for living off prostitution.
"Some cards advertise how girls will visit hotel rooms but hoteliers also should be warned if they know what is going on then they too could be in trouble for living off the proceeds of prostitution.
"Any brothel advertising a BT phone line could have their service cut off."

Three car park workers were suspended from work after being accused of selling homemade DVDs compiled from security camera footage of canoodling couples.
The film is believed to have come from CCTV at the Russell Road car park, one of the 11 run by NCP in Brighton and Hove.
Clips allegedly show lovers performing sexual acts on top of cars, near lifts and against walls.
It was claimed workers had made the DVDs using computers in the control room and three people were suspended amid claims the film was being sold in public houses.
Two members of staff have now returned to work but a third remains suspended on full pay while the allegations are investigated.
Tim Cowen, NCP communications director, emphasised the company had found no evidence of any truth in the claims.
He said: "There is no evidence other than spoken allegations at the moment.
"The CCTV allegations involve suggestions CCTV images from one car park have been captured and used in ways not permitted by the Data Protection Act and contrary to written company procedures.
"After a full and detailed internal investigation no such images have been found by the company.
"It is clear that, should images from CCTV cameras be sold or passed to a third party, that third party would also be in breach of the Data Protection Act. We will do whatever we can to ensure the police prosecute anyone who breaches the Act.
"In the meantime, we have rigorously examined our procedures for monitoring our CCTV cameras in our control room to ensure the correct procedures continue to be in place."
None of the public houses The Argus spoke to had been approached with illegal DVDs.
Daniel Jennings, 27, assistant manager of The Cricketers pub in Black Lion Street, Brighton, said:
"I certainly haven't heard anything about it.
"Even if we did, we wouldn't allow it.
"I have thrown out people who are trying to sell fake DVDs a couple of times."
Theresa Grey, 38, a store manager of Bonchurch Road, Brighton, said: "It is an invasion of privacy but if people are having sex in car parks they are going to be caught by someone. They are in a public place."
Another member of the public who did not want to be named said: "It is appalling. There could be children walking by who would see just what was happening."
Matthew Beaver, [geddit?] 42, who runs a burger van in Crowhurst Road, Brighton, took a more sympathetic view.
He said: "Most people have had sex somewhere strange, in an aeroplane or the countryside.
"Having sex in a car park is a new one on me but you certainly wouldn't expect to be filmed."
A spokeswoman for Sussex Police said if the allegations were true the workers involved could be prosecuted for invasion of privacy, theft and reproduction without permission. She said: "We will liaise with NCP to ensure this cannot happen again and CCTV is not being abused."
Having sex in a public place is considered a crime if someone takes offence and reports it.
But the spokeswoman said anyone who thought they may have been filmed should not be unduly worried.
She said: "They should just remember to be careful next time they are in the throes of passion and perhaps find somewhere more comfortable."

Two mischievous schoolgirls had to be rescued by firefighters after they climbed too far up a tree and could not get down.
Despite their mothers' protests, eight-year-olds Zoe Ping and Jenny Hopkins raced up the tall tree on their way home from Westdene Primary School, Brighton. The girls were stuck up the tree in Dene Vale for more than half an hour on Thursday while a crew from Brighton's Preston Circus fire station came to their rescue.
Jenny's mum Mary Hopkins, 42, a partner at Abacus cash register company, of Green Ridge, Brighton, said: "We were just walking the girls back from their school art club.
"I shouted at them that if they did not stop climbing I would have to call the ambulance or the fire brigade but before we knew it they were almost all the way up.
"Zoe's mum Jo suddenly stopped talking to me and said, ëLook where they are.' After they realised they couldn't get down they started to get quite upset, so we had to call the fire brigade.
"When they got down they said a big thank you to the firemen. Luckily they didn't seem to be that scared of heights."
Zoe's dad Peter Ping, [so-called because of his fondness for playing with the elastic on girls’ knickers],54, a computer consultant, of Brangwyn Drive, Brighton, said: "The tree must be about 35ft. It's certainly higher than the chimney on my two-storey house.
"Luckily, they are fairly robust kids and there was no wailing or screaming or anything.
"I have been to that tree quite a lot with Zoe and I am scared of heights and always tell her not to climb it. So the minute she was with her mum and not me, she just went for it.
"I think she climbed up the outside and Jenny climbed up the middle. They are slightly bonkers little chums."
Zoe said: "I was climbing and I just got carried away because I was following my friend. I was about a metre below her.
"Jenny didn't want the firemen to rescue her but I didn't mind. We were frozen up there but the fireman gave us his jacket and it was lovely and warm.
"I wasn't that scared but it was quite far up. My mum was probably more scared. I am not brave, I just like climbing, and I am going to go climbing again but only on the little tree in my garden."
Zoe's sister Nina, 23, added: "My mum called me at about 4pm and said, ëYou won't believe what your little sister's gone and done.'
"My dad thought it was hilarious and drove round there with a camera to take pictures. I spoke to Zoe later and there were a few tears but by the next morning her confidence for climbing had fully returned."

Whitehawk is on the dole,
Whitehawk is on parole,
Whitehawk is really heavy news.
Whitehawk is dodgy gear,
Small kids who drink and swear,
And pit-bull dogs with tattoos.

From today’s Argus:

GIRLS as young as 13 are at the forefront of a rise in underage street drinking in the county's most deprived housing estates.
Large groups of teenagers are sneaking out of their homes after their parents have gone to bed and congregating every night on street corners in Whitehawk, Brighton, to swig neat vodka.
Others are being more blatant - meeting as early as 6pm to drink with friends.
Residents on the estate have told police they believe teenage drinkers - and particularly girls - are becoming an increasing scourge on the community in east Brighton.
PC Chris Callaghan, who covers the Whitehawk beat, told a crime prevention forum: "There is a problem with drinking, girls of 14 years old are consuming a lot of alcohol every day."
PC Callaghan said he was trying to get alcohol outreach workers to visit the area to help deal with the problem.
Residents in Whitehawk are setting up a working party to investigate the extent of the problem and come up with solutions.
Cherry Channon, a resident from the area, told the crime forum last week: "These children are 13, 14 and 15 years old. I want to know where their parents are. They shouldn't be out drinking."
Faith Matyszak, also of Whitehawk, said: "They meet about 6pm to 8pm and they are drinking quite heavily. This happens every day.
"It's far more serious than people realise."
Businesses selling alcohol in Whitehawk are working with residents to ensure young people are not getting drink from their outlets.
But residents told the forum that alcohol was being brought onto the estate from other outlets, possibly by older people, who were handing it to youngsters.
Darren Snow, who runs the successful Crew Club youth centre in Whitehawk, said: "We have to work with young people and stop looking at them being a problem but I'm confident there's a way to integrate them back into the community."

25.04.05
Labour may be beating the Tories in the pre-election polls but when it comes to their choice of under-wear the Tories are streets ahead.
Conservatives have been snapping up pairs of blue knickers which are, well, quite conservative.
The delightful but rather modest pants, complete with the party emblem, would not be out of place in Bridget Jones' underwear drawer.
It seems they may soon be the latest must-have accessory for many of the Tory party faithful as well.
The knickers are the brainchild of Ian and Jackie Whitworth, from Telscombe Cliffs.
They run Say It With Knickers, an on-line knicker mailing service, and send out personalised knickers with messages hand-stitched on to them.
As the General Election was announced, they decided to liven up the campaigns by sending details of their latest election range to constituency offices around the country.
As well as the blue Conservative full briefs there also green thongs for the Greens, orange boy pants for the Lib Dems, high leg pants in yellow for the SNP, purple bikini briefs for UKIP and, of course, a sexy pair of red ones for Labour.
Yet the question of whether Tony Blair is preparing to wear a pair on election night under his sharp dark suit is one still to be answered.
Ian said: "Their slogans, Are You Thinking What We're Thinking?, Looking Forwards Not Backwards and The Real Alternative look very funny on a pair of knickers.
"They are actually causing quite a storm and we've generally had a warm response.
"The first order came in ten minutes after we sent the emails.
"From the constituency offices we have contacted so far the Conservatives are way in front in terms of orders placed. Then it's the Lib Dems, with Labour trailing at the back."
He said many of the orders were gifts to be given after the election to candidates' teams.
Others he hoped will be used as part of the campaigns. Ian said: "We like the idea that people are voting with their knickers."
Nicholas Boles, Conservative candidate for Hove and Portslade, said: "It doesn't bear thinking about, John Prescott in knickers, but his policy on the Falmer stadium is pants."
David Lepper, Labour candidate for Brighton Pavilion, said it was an interesting idea.
He said: "The impression I get at the moment is that my opponents are getting their knickers in a twist.
"When it comes down to the bare essentials, face to face contact is best but if we were showing our knickers we are not sure what sort of response we would get."
Lib Dem Paul Elgood, who is also standing for Hove and Portslade, said: "Anything which increases awareness, and therefore turnout, in the election is very welcome.
"Some brief fun always adds to the campaigning.
The Lib Dems are enjoying rising support in this election.
"By wearing political underwear, people are saying pants to the parties they don't support."
The couple are planning to target the Greens, the SNP and UKIP.
Ian said: "We have barely scratched the surface and are hoping to contact many more candidates by the time the election comes along."
For orders and more info, visit www.sayitwithknickers.com

Green Knickers for a Green Party - of Course!

Dozens of Brighton & Hove Albion fans were delayed by more than an hour on their return home from Saturday's match - because their train went the wrong way.
The 6.36pm from Sheffield should have delivered about 100 Seagulls supporters, who had watched their team beat Rotherham 1-0, to London St Pancras by 8.45pm.
Instead, they were told by an announcer after 45 minutes that the train had followed the wrong route and would have to retrace its journey.
Many supporters missed connecting trains to Brighton and arrived home after midnight.
Noele Hawker, 36, of Osbourne Villas, Hove, said: "We'd been going for about 45 minutes when the train went through Chesterfield station and then it just stopped.
"We sat there for about ten minutes and then an announcement came over the intercom saying it had been incorrectly routed'.
"We backed up the line and returned to Chesterfield and then switched tracks again."
The Midland Mainline train eventually got in to London's St Pancras station at 9.55pm.
Mr Hawker did not get back to Brighton until about midnight and was late for a party.
He said: "Everyone was in high spirits and quite jolly because of the win but, as the journey wore on, people got a lot more dispirited."
The delay was augmented by other incidents on board the train involving the police.
Andy Naylor, a sports writer for The Argus, was with the fans heading back to Brighton.
He said: "People were pretty fed up but it was more a case of disbelief than anger."
Midland Mainline trains and Network Rail have accepted joint responsibility for the mistake.
A spokeswoman for Network Rail said trains following the Sheffield to St Pancras route usually go through Derby. There were engineering works on that stretch of track so services were being rerouted.
Unfortunately a signalman let the 6.36pm train through on to the stretch of track approaching the maintenance work.
The spokeswoman said: "It was caused by human error. The signalman, who is under the jurisdiction of Network Rail, put the train through on the wrong line. The driver on the Midland Mainline Train would also have known about the works and should have queried the signalman.
"There were no safety implications as we have systems in place to ensure the train would not have got near the works."
A signalman halted the train when he noticed it was heading down the wrong route.

The following appeared in today’s ARGUS. It is part of a story about the announcement of the winner of the Hove seat, the fragrant Celia Barlow, in yesterday’s election.


‘[It] descended into farce as Independent candidate Bob Dobbs climbed on to the stage and began shouting. Silent Majority candidate Richard Franklin began shouting too.’

I took this at Hove Lions Carnival early this afternoon, but then it rained.

In addition to the high profile advertising of the ARGUS, I have also caught a woman doing a bit of bum fingering. That’s my kind-a woman.

On Page 7 of today’s edition, a story entitled ‘Mugabe can bank on Hoogstraten’ contains this sentence.

“Hoogstraten also has a controlling stake in Wankie, the country's largest coal mine.”

Villagers have formed a campaign group to get a nearby swingers club closed down.
The over 18s Hamshaw club in Scaynes Hill, near Haywards Heath, is advertised as an adult health spa, but local visitors claimed people watched pornography and took part in orgies.
Mid Sussex District Council has ordered the club, also known as the Brighton Sun Club, to stop their pole dancing events as it does not have the required public entertainment licence.
The club, in Sloop Lane, will now have to publicly advertise for the licence but can continue to hold swinging events, which are not illegal.
The club's management refused to comment but its web site offers extensive advice about swinging, swinging etiquette and safe sex.
Dozens of nearby residents have made complaints to the council and have now formed a committee to protest against the club.
Arron Newbury, 41, an agricultural engineer, of Nash Lane, Scaynes Hill, said: "They have classed themselves as an adult health spa but it is little more than a glorified brothel.
"My wife and I went believing it was simply a naturist park, which it used to be years ago, but we saw people watching pornography and having sex all over the place. People were having sex in the jacuzzi, the steam room, the woods outside.
"There are these play rooms where people invite you in and the pole dancer was explicit to say the least.
"We couldn't believe it. My wife was in tears when we left. We pay a lot of money in council tax and we do not want a sex club in our community."
Geraldine Ratcliffe, 33, a housewife, of Lewes Road, Scaynes Hill, said: "I went with my husband believing it was a health spa and he couldn't get me out of there quick enough. It was absolutely disgusting. It was like a brothel.
"We certainly didn't stay very long. We couldn't believe there was a place like this on our own doorstep."
The club's web site boasts eight acres of wooded trails, a 30-person jacuzzi, 30-person sauna, 30-person turkish steam bath, outdoor pool and extensive play rooms.
Mr Newbury added: "When they try to get their licence there will be serious objections because we really don't want this club in our area. A lot of residents have been meeting at the nearby Sloop pub to voice our concerns. We will protest against this.
"Residents are appalled that such an establishment should still be allowed to operate within this very picturesque village."
Martin Burrekoven-Kalve, spokesman for the district council, said: "A couple of weeks ago we made an unannounced inspection during the evening. We found nothing that contravened the licences except for one matter but we are satisfied with their health and safety and food standards.
"However, aside from their premises licence they require a public entertainment licence because they provide pole dancing and they also play recorded music.
"They did not have that licence in place and said they were unaware they needed it. We have instructed them not to permit further dancing until the public entertainment licence is in place.
"That is the extent of our statutory powers. We have kept our partner organisations, such as the local police, informed of these developments."
Chief Inspector Robin Smith, of Mid Sussex District Police, said: "We were recently made aware of the premises and are working with the licensing authorities.”

From today’s edition:


Police have warned future Pride participants not to put their privates on parade.

One member of the annual carnival procession on Saturday was dressed up as the Star Wars character Darth Vader. Members of the public reported him to the police for indecency after he was spotted flashing his private parts. The man was told to keep his light sabre under cover.

Another man in the procession was also seen exposing himself to members of the public.

Grandmother Rita Langford, 62, of Langley Crescent, Woodingdean, spotted the second flasher as she was watching the parade on London Road.

She said: “It didn’t shock me. There were some teenage girls who were laughing but it wasn’t appropriate really as there were small children and families around.”

A Sussex Police spokesman said: “We had some complaints about a Darth Vader. Some of our officers had some strong words with him as it’s a family event.”

Police were unaware of the second flasher but said such behaviour at future processions would not be accepted.

Miles; Could you post a link to this article?

The item did not appear on the Internet, although it may eventually feature in the archives of the Argus. Changed daily, their stories page is

http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/

and the Argus home page

http://www.theargus.co.uk/the_argus/

One can subscribe and read the paper on line, thus eliminating that long dreary trudge to the newsagents, but few do.

Cheeky showgirls who revealed too much cleavage for a bank holiday carnival were given a dressing down by police.
The officer in charge of policing Worthing Rotary Carnival on Monday ordered them to change into something less revealing.
The girls, representing Secrets lingerie shop in Worthing, turned up in skin-tight hotpants and skimpy Victorian-style basques.
But unlike revellers at Brighton and Hove's Pride Festival earlier this month, where many of the outfits left nothing to the imagination, the girls were told to cover up or not take part.
Carnival organiser John Cherry said: "Basically the police sergeant took one look and his mouth dropped open."
Victoria Zoutewelle, proprietor of Secrets, based in Warwick Lane, off Warwick Street, said: "I think he was gobsmacked when we got out of the car.
"Being an underwear shop some of the girls wore Victorian corsets and frilly hot pants which were quite cheeky but the policeman said it was not suitable.
"He really wasn't happy about it at all, saying there were a lot of children watching.
"I personally didn't think it was risquÈ at all, although it probably is to Worthing, being quite a conservative town."
Eight girls rushed back to the shop and changed into less revealing bunny girl, nurse and, ironically, police uniforms, complete with fishnet stockings and high-heeled boots.
Victoria said they then went on to win the £150 first prize for the business section and vowed to enter two floats next year.
She said: "Everybody enjoyed it."
Mr Cherry, chairman of the carnival's organising committee, said: "I was there on the spot when it happened. About eight or ten good looking young ladies turned up to demonstrate their lingerie.
"At least four of them were distinctly scantily-dressed. The police sergeant said you cannot wear that in public. I did agree with him. It was just a touch over the top. They were seriously underdressed.
"It was a very good advert for their products but not really appropriate for a public event.
"I think the police were right although some might say it was a bit of a shame. They went rushing back to the shop and came back more fully clad."
Sergeant Andy Westwood, who gave the girls the dressing down, said: "A good eight or nine young ladies were not appropriately dressed for a family and charity event.
"I told them they couldn't take part in the carnival unless they changed their attire. They put more clothes on and became a bit more acceptable.
"If I hadn't stopped them I suspect they would have got complaints. This was a family event with youngsters watching."

From today’s Argus, this sure ain’t my kind-a reporting. They don’t even give the date on which this outrage occurred. Perhaps it happens every day?

‘A couple were cautioned by police for having sex on the beach at Hove at 3.30pm.
Shocked members of the public spotted the lovers in a passionate embrace near the King Alfred leisure centre.’


Here’s another Argus gem. It’s from 6 July, 1960:

‘A youth travelling on the top deck of the last bus to Washington and Storrington, shouted out of the window to a policeman on duty at Offington Corner, Worthing: “Got a fag, mate?”
The youth, aged 16, denied at Worthing Juvenile Court, that he was disorderly on a public service vehicle. He was fined £3 with £4 11s. 6d. costs.’

On Page 7 of today’s edition:

Drivers were forced to dodge a barrage of frozen chips. A concerned motorist told police that the chips were hitting cars in Sackville Road and Montgomery Street, Hove.
He said they were being thrown from the roof of the nearby former Hove General Hospital which has been converted into flats.
There were no reports of damage to vehicles following the incident on Wednesday night.

The readers’ letters in the Argus are becoming as bizarre as its stories. In yesterday’s edition the following letter appeared with the title ‘Whispered apology’.


THIS is an apology to anyone I might have offended by calling out to them from outside St Leonard’s Church, Portslade. [The poor confused sod doesn’t know where the church from which he is calling out is situated. St. Leonard’s is in New Church Road, Hove.]
Our little church is under threat of closure, so my family and I have opened the doors each Saturday morning for the past three months, offering free coffee and biscuits to passers-by to visit and hopefully help keep it open.
I have stood on the pavement and called to many people to get their attention, in what I intended to be an amusing manner.
I have, however, been informed at least one gentleman didn’t like being shouted to in the street.
It wasn’t my intention to embarrass anyone and if anyone else has been offended they [sic] can visit the church on Saturday, where I will apologise in person.
P Chandler, Benfield Way, Portslade.



Last Saturday, someone outside the church called out to me, but I ignored the blighter and continued on my way to the Peeporama Club. I will tomorrow, however, be demanding an apology, but not before I have consumed a vast quantity of his coffee and biscuits.

Famed for its fearless reporting of the activities of kinky teachers, the Argus has today turned its attention to a psychotic teacher:



A mentally ill maths teacher who stabbed a former colleague in the street in a desperate cry for help claimed her doctor had told her to get a grip. [on a knife?]

Gifted academic Sarah Markham plunged a five-inch knife into fellow teacher Oliver Bentham's back as he put coins in a parking meter outside the college where they had both taught in Hove.

Yesterday Markham, of Hova Villas, Hove, was detained in a secure mental hospital after she admitted carrying out the attack.

Lewes Crown Court heard Markham, 36, claim she attacked Mr Bentham to get attention because her GP had refused to help when she had said she was suffering from depression, anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder.

Now NHS bosses have launched an investigation into the 36-year-old's allegations about her doctor.

Mr Bentham, 49, was putting money into the meter in Cromwell Road in January when he suddenly felt three slaps on his back. He turned around and saw Markham standing near him with a knife in her hand.

He realised he had been stabbed rather than slapped on the back and managed to get Markham to put the knife, which had a serrated blade, on a wall. But she picked it up again and rushed towards him and stabbed him in the chest.

Mr Bentham had worked with Markham at the private Bellerbys College - which offers pre-university courses for international students - until she had left her post a few weeks before the attack, He escaped serious injury but needed stitches in hospital.
The court heard she had attempted suicide twice following the attack.

In court Markham, a Cambridge University graduate with a doctorate from Durham University, admitted wounding with intent and was made the subject of an order under the Mental Health Act which means she will be detained indefinitely for treatment in a secure hospital.

Upon her release she will be subject to continuing assessments.

Sarah Lindop, defending, said Markham, who has no previous convictions, had acted out of character.

She said: "She has a perception that people will view what she has done as a monster and she has expressed she will never do it again. She is very clear in her own mind that what occurred would never and could never occur again. She never thought herself capable of hurting someone in the manner of Mr Bentham. She was and remains rather staggered she was capable of it."

Recorder Janet Waddicor told Markham: "At the time of this incident you had been walking around with this knife in your possession for ten days and you intended to self-harm. Oliver Bentham was the hapless victim who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

"I have no difficulty in accepting from the moment you committed this act you were full of regret for what you did."

At the time of the attack Markham was working as a teaching assistant at Blatchington Mill School, in Hove, where she is still employed.

Brighton and Hove City Council refused to comment on whether a risk assessment on Markham had been carried out when she was taken on by Blatchington Mill - or whether an investigation into whether she should have been allowed to work with children would be carried out.

A spokeswoman said: "We can confirm she is an employee at Blatchington Mill. We cannot give any further information because staff details are held in confidence and we have a duty to ensure they are private."

Bellerbys College, where Markham had worked until shortly before the attack, declined to comment on the incident.

A spokeswoman for Brighton and Hove Teaching Primary Care Trust said: "This is a very unfortunate incident. The PCT will be investigating the situation fully.

After a psychotic teacher comes a psychotic stripper.


A woman accused of stabbing her boyfriend was once heard shouting for help for no reason, a court heard.

Melissa Walker, 26, is on trial at Lewes Crown Court charged with wounding with intent Mathew Quant, who nearly died of his injuries.

Walker denies the charge and claims she acted in self-defence when he attacked her.

The court has heard the couple had a volatile four-month relationship with rows fuelled by drink and drugs before Mr Quant was stabbed in the chest with an ornamental dagger at her flat in Denmark Villas, Hove, in October 2005.

The curved blade narrowly missed his heart and he died three times before medics revived him.

Mr Quant, a scaffolder, from Bevendean, Brighton, has told the jury he never hit Walker, who was working as a stripper at the time of their relationship.

He has accused her of suddenly stabbing him for no reason after the couple mislaid £250 worth of cocaine at her flat.

Giving evidence on the third day of the trial, his mother, Lynn Quant, told the jury she saw the couple have heated rows but never witnessed any physical violence.

She said her son once called her from Walker's flat and asked her to come and pick him up as their relationship had ended.

Mrs Quant said when she arrived both her son and Walker appeared calm and were chatting together on a balcony.

While Mrs Quant waited in the hallway, she suddenly heard Walker shouting for help.

She said: "Out of the blue I heard her screaming 'Help'. [Or was she simply rehearsing her favourite Beatles number for the next show at the 'Peeperama Club'?] It was such bizarre behaviour. It was really loud so it could have drawn attention from neighbours. I was surprised nobody knocked on the door to see if she needed any assistance."

Ms Quant said there did not appear to be a reason for the outburst. She said: "They were talking quite calmly, both of them."

She said Walker, who now lives in Lincoln, did not really respond when she asked her what she was doing.

During cross-examination Mrs Quant said she had called the police to her home twice when her son had been behaving in an aggressive manner. She admitted he had smashed her phone and punched holes in the walls.

The trial continues.

Tan ban on nude man
By Nigel Freedman

An old [Ace reporter Nigel is unaware that in Brighton the word for a person of this age is ‘older’.] man has been told to stop sunbathing naked - or face jail.

Serial flasher Richard Stofer, [known locally as 'Stiffer'] 63, has a history of letting it all hang out when the sun comes out.

But he has been given a final warning after being caught lying naked in a neighbour's garden while she was out.

Police were called after another neighbour's children saw him lying on his front from from [sic] upstairs window.

Officers who climbed onto a chair and peered over a hedge could see him in the garden in Victoria Drive, Eastbourne.

He claimed he had gone into the garden after his own lawn was left in shadow.

Stofer was in breach of an antisocial behaviour order (Asbo) banning him from exposing himself in public, a court heard.

Robert Hall, prosecuting, said Stofer had previous convictions for sunbathing naked and exposing himself on Eastbourne beach in 2004.

He was also prosecuted for stripping off in the front garden of his home in Milton Road, Eastbourne, where he could be seen through a hole in the hedge.

The Asbo was slapped on him in 2005 and he was warned he faced up to five years in prison if he flouted it.

Stofer had denied breaching the order on July 31 last year and was due to stand trial at Hove Crown Court yesterday. However, he changed his plea to guilty after being told he would be given a suspended sentence.

He admitted breaking the ban by exposing his genitals in a place which was in public view.

Charles Royale, defending, said: "He is extremely sorry and ashamed.

"He only went into the neighbour's garden to sunbathe when his own became overshadowed.

"He did not know he was being observed but accepts that he should have checked properly to see if he could be seen by others.

"He says he was not lying in a way to expose himself and had a towel to cover himself if anyone came."

Stofer was given a five month prison sentence suspended for two years.

He was also banned from going into the neighbour's garden for two years

Judge Cedric Joseph told him: "This sort of conduct cannot continue.
If you commit and offence of this kind again you will be going straight off to prison."

Heroic PC disarms knife maniac


A heroic police officer disarmed a knife-wielding man in a busy town centre street at the weekend.

The man tried to stab a police officer after jumping on top of a patrol car and smashing the windscreen.

Police were called to Brunswick Road, in Hove, after several panicked reports of a man brandishing a long blade chasing and threatening passers by.

He was cornered by two police cars in nearby Waterloo Street - where he climbed onto one of the vehicles, smashed its windscreen and stabbed through the roof with the knife.

The car contained a 28-year-old male officer and a 21-year-old female officer, both of whom were uninjured.

The knifeman then attempted to stab another 28-year-old male officer but was overpowered.

Shoppers and residents spoke of their shock after the incident, which took place on Saturday at about 11am.

Beryl Owen, 67, of Cambridge Road, Hove, said: "I saw the man at the bottom of Brunswick Road shouting at people walking past. He pulled a knife out and people were screaming and running off. It was like something out of a film.

"The police came and he jumped on top of one of the cars and the windscreen smashed. It was unbelievable, people were standing round in shock.

"I saw a policeman hit him with a truncheon to try and overpower him. I'm just pleased no one was hurt. It could have been a lot worse."

A nearby shopkeeper, who did not want to be named, said: "I saw him chasing people and shouting at them waving a knife around. It was surreal, people were literally running away from him.

"I closed the door and locked the shop up straight away. The police came very quickly and he was chased down into Waterloo Street.

"This is a busy road but I've never seen anything like that, it was very frightening."

No police officers or members of the public were injured.

A long-bladed knife was recovered. The road was closed for about two hours as forensic experts scoured the scene.

The incident is being investigated by Sussex Police's major crime branch and the suspect was last night being quizzed by detectives. Detective Inspector Michelle Collins said: "This was obviously a very unusual incident, but the officers at the scene handled it extremely well. The officer who was attacked is fine.

"He was incredibly brave and I have no doubt at all that his actions helped to stop a member of the public being seriously injured."

Ayhan Kilavuz, [pronounced kill-a-fuzz] 36, of Waterloo Street, Hove, has been charged with attempting to wound a police officer and making threats to kill. He will appear at Brighton Magistrates' Court this morning (Monday)

Drunk horsejacker leaves two injured
By Ben Parsons

A drunk woman caused chaos when she hijacked a horse-drawn wedding carriage and ran down a one-legged man on a mobility scooter.
The shire horses were standing outside a pub when the woman and her daughter clambered aboard and whipped them into bolting.
They knocked a disabled man off his scooter and ran over one of the horses' owners as the animals headed off down the road.
The animals - which weigh nearly a tonne each - wrote off a parked car and damaged beyond repair the £10,000 carriage they were pulling.
The disabled man was left bleeding on the pavement as other drinkers rushed to his aid.
Police in Peacehaven are appealing for witnesses to the bizarre chain of events.
The incident happened at 7pm on Sunday outside the Good Companion pub in Roderick Avenue, Peacehaven.
The horse and carriage had been hired for a Sikh wedding at the town's Meridian Centre.
Black shire horses Charlie and Buster pulled the bride and groom through the town at the head of a procession of 30 cars.
At the end of the day the carriages' owners, Adie and Jane Matthews, pulled up at the Good Companion.
Mr Matthews went inside to get a drink while Mrs Matthews stayed at the head of the horses.
He said: "Two girls decided to get on the back of the carriage, pick up the whip and strike the horses across the back.
"They ran over my wife and an old boy on a mobility scooter.
"The horses went round into the pub car park and got hooked up on a car, so that stopped them going out onto the road."
One of the horses was slightly injured, while the carriage was permanently damaged when it collided with a parked Ford Fiesta. The car's owner has told pub staff he thinks it is a write-off.
Mr Matthews said: "It could have been even worse.
"We could have had two dead people it is that bad.
"We do the job properly. It upsets me when this sort of thing happens."
Mrs Matthews was bruised when the horse knocked her down. The disabled man, thought to be about 60, gashed his arm in the collision and was treated at the scene by paramedics. He was taken to Royal Sussex County Hospital in Brighton where he was given stitches and later released.
Staff at the Good Companion confirmed the woman who climbed on the carriage had been drinking.
Assistant manager Martina Bond said: "It was the irresponsibility of the mother that led to this disaster.
"She's going to be barred. We will be cooperating with police enquiries."
She said the woman's child was "scared" after the horses ran out of control.
Customers at the busy pub rushed to help the stricken man after the accident.
Miss Bond said: "It was quite emotional. We were worried that he was going to die.
"He was going in and out of consciousness and he lost a lot of blood.
"There were quite a lot of customers who were trying to help this gentlemen.
"He's got a large drink waiting for him when he comes back."
Sgt Robin Fuller, of Sussex Police, said: "This is an extremely unusual event in Peacehaven. [Unlike Rottingdean, where it is a daily occurrence.]
"The irresponsible actions by the woman that got onto the wagon caused a very nasty incident which could have had even worse consequences to members of the public, property and the horses.
"Fortunately the disabled man is recovering from his injuries.
"If anyone has information regarding the identity of the female that got onto the wagon and raised the whip to the horses I would like to hear from them."
Anyone with information can contact Sussex Police on 0845 6070999 or Crimestoppers anonymously on 0800 555111.

A DAILY OCCURANCE!!!!!
Who the Hell would want to live in Rottingdean then!!!! It must be like Dodge City!

England like England should be.

<div><br />Rottingdean, East Sussex<br />Uploaded by BigJohnPeacehaven</div>

Woman held in secure hospital after knife raid
By Richard Gurner

A knife-wielding woman rampaged through a town centre while on a day trip from a mental hospital.
Rachel Jones, 22, threatened a Superdrug cashier with a knife and demanded money after downing two cans of cider in the toilets of a coffee shop.
Two managers at the shop in North Street, Hailsham, tried to calm her down but she fled towards Vicarage Field, where she threw a glass bottle of cider through a shop window.
She then jumped on a bus but was followed by a shop worker who told the driver she had a knife.
When the bus driver refused to move she ran off again, pushing a woman to the ground as she tried to make a citizen's arrest.
Soon after she was tackled by police officers and arrested.
Jones, of Colchins, Burgess Hill, had been released from the Amber Lodge secure unit in The Drive, Hailsham, for an hour-long, unsupervised excursion in Hailsham when the incident happened on January 12.
The next day she used a razor blade she had hidden in her shoe to attack a police officer who was escorting her after an appearance at Hailsham Magistrates' Court.
At Lewes Crown Court yesterday she admitted charges of criminal damage, common assault, having a bladed article, assaulting a police officer, attempted robbery and stealing the black-handled kitchen knife she used in the robbery.
Her defence barrister, Jennifer Grey, told the court Jones had suffered from mental health problems since she was 17 and had spent most of her time since then in hospital.
Miss Grey said: "She had been hearing voices in her head telling her to do certain things and it was difficult for her to distinguish between those voices and her own real thoughts.
"She didn't like living with the restrictions of Amber Lodge and needed to get some money to stay in a hotel."
Psychiatrist Dr Roderick Lay told the court Jones posed a low risk to the public and said the main risk she posed was to herself.
He added: "Her actions have often been a means to an end to get out of a situation."
Jones was sentenced to two-and-a-half years in custody by Judge Guy Anthony. She will spend the time in St Andrews Hospital in Northampton where she will receive specialist treatment.
Judge Anthony said: "The sentence recognises the seriousness of what you did but also recognises that hopefully you will be able to be treated in hospital.
"Unfortunately if it turns out there is no treatment available then it is up to the authorities to transfer you to prison.
"Only time will tell.”

John

These constant displays of public abnormality make me quite worried for your safety, you must make a point of dropping in more often, so we can check on you, we don't want to be reading in that delightful publication the ARGUS that you have been subjected to abuse or kidnapped by the psycho’s and kinky folk from Sussex, they seem to be breeding in numbers by the week.

Ketta

Dear Ketta,

I am quite moved by your concern for my welfare, but can reassure you that I fear no danger in Hove, God’s Waiting Ground.

Seldom do I venture further than the seafront, nowadays. At the moment the beach is filled with hordes of women getting their tits out, but come September they will all have gone home and once again the promenade will be alive with the sound of Zimmer frames and the air filled with prescriptions.

Here is a nice picture for you of some ladies at the bowling club on the Kingsway waiting to receive corporal punishment.

John

Shear [geddit?] madness lands drunkard in court
By Ruth Lumley

A man drunkenly waved a pair of garden shears above his head and threatened a bloodbath in his village.
Steven Dixon, 26, known as Italian Steve, staggered in to the road and shouted: "I am going to kill you, I am going to kill everyone. You are going to see blood".
Dixon pleaded guilty at Lewes Crown Court yesterday (Fri) to using or threatening violence in Willow Way, Hurstpierpoint, assaulting a police constable and resisting a police constable on May 2.
Amy Packham, prosecuting, said: "There were three young girls in the road aged between seven and ten. He started to stumble towards them but fell over before he reached them.
"They ran away into a house because they were frightened by what they saw."
Dixon, of Willow Gardens, Hurstpierpoint, was heard by another resident to shout: "Get an ambulance, there is going to be blood everywhere."
But onlookers said they were unable to tell who his threats were aimed at.
Dixon tried to climb a fence and put his foot through it but it eventually gave way, allowing him to climb into a back garden.
While he was there he dialled 999 and claimed he had been the victim of an assault. He was abusive to the call handler and told her that if the police did not come there was going to be a murder, the court was told.
Police arrived and found Italian-born Dixon in the garden. He identified himself and officers could see his eyes were glazed and bloodshot, his speech was slurred and he was drunk.
One of the officers asked him to go to their vehicle but as he started to walk with the officer he became abusive and pulled away when the officer tried to hold his arm.
Miss Packham said: "The defendant became aggressive and started swearing continually at the officer. As he was in the police car, which was travelling down the A23, he became aggressive and wiped his nose on the car seat."
Dixon elbowed one of the officers in the arm and tried to headbutt him. He had to be restrained for the rest of the journey.
Dixon also admitted drink driving in Park Road, Burgess Hill, on September 15 last year.
Judge Guy Anthony remanded him in custody and he will be sentenced on August 31

Teenagers take part in dangerous new craze
By Ruth Lumley

Teenagers are stealing wheelie bins then torching them to get a chemical high in a dangerous new trend.
So far those taking part in the dangerous and "spectacularly idiotic" craze have targeted the residents in Ifield, Crawley, where a number of council-owned bins have gone missing.
Victim Linda McCann, of Aldingbourne Close, reported her £60 bin stolen and said she believed youngsters were rounding them up to torch them in nearby woods to set fire to them [sic] and get a chemical high from the fumes.
She said: "I was absolutely gobsmacked and horrified to hear they might be doing this to get a high. It is so dangerous.
"I said to my daughter 'what happens if one of these kids gets really high and passes out?" [She replied, "they fall over."]
Sergeant Tara Gould, who is based in Crawley, said: "This is the first I have heard of it. I have to say this seems a spectacularly idiotic thing to do and as well as causing damage they are putting their health and lives at risk."
Deputy District Commander for Crawley Mark Andrews issued a warning to youngsters involved with the craze.
He said: "This can be far more dangerous than sniffing glue or sniffing petrol fumes.
"All in all it is just very dangerous. Sniffing this kind of toxic plastic fumes is deadly, it could be fatal." [sic]
Crawley Borough Council spokeswoman Janet Treagus said residents should contact the police if they further incidents occur.
She said: "Community wardens will step up patrols in the area but this is a matter for the police.
"It would be difficult for us to lock up the bins because we would have to ask everyone to chain their bins up and that may not be reasonable."
The drug of choice for the Crawley youngsters seems to follow a trend for a cheap high that is sweeping the country.
Already police have reported similar incidents in South Yorkshire and Scotland, where it was known for people to burn bus shelters to get the same effect.
Director of anti-solvent abuse charity Re-Solv Warren Hawksley warned of the dangers of inhaling fumes.
He said: "It's a deadly combination. They can be breathing in a whole compound of different chemicals in the plastic and not have a clue about what they actually are, or what they're doing to them.
"It's worrying that these incidents seem to be spreading too."
Have a spate of wheelie bins been stolen from your area? Do you suspect youngsters are following this craze in your community?

Is this the breast use of police resources?
By Louise Acford

Two girls are facing a costly Crown Court trial for flashing their breasts at a CCTV camera on a seaside promenade.
Abbi-Louise Maple, of Worthing, and Rachel Marchant, of Eastern Avenue in Shoreham, could line up with robbers, fraudsters and sex attackers after allegedly lifting their tops in Worthing.
The cheeky pair, both 21, have been charged with outraging public decency after a CCTV operator reported them to police.
Now they will defend their case in front of a jury during a trial set to cost taxpayers up to £10,000 a day.
They were accused of lifting their tops and exposing themselves on July 16 while on Worthing beach opposite the Aquarena.
The women were stopped by police as they walked home from what had been a fun day at the beach.
Abbi-Louise, who lives in Worthing during the week and Manor Hall Road in Southwick at weekends, said: "The police who came and arrested us thought it was funny. They were laughing and so was the female sergeant who saw us when we got to the station."
Abbi-Louise has ambitions to be a topless model.
She said: "The camera operator was a man. You'd have thought he'd have gone "oi, oi" and it would have made his day.
"It's silly. They should drop all charges.
"It's a waste of tax payers' money. I will have to take time off work, unpaid, for being accused of flashing my boobs.
"I have to laugh otherwise I would cry.
"It is silly but it's worrying too. I don't want to go to Crown Court and I don't want a criminal record.
"Breasts are everywhere these days - on the beach, in magazines, everywhere. I can't see what the problem is."
Their solicitor, Chris Chatterton, said: "What have we come to when cases like this appear before the court.
"A bit of harmless fun has been criminalised."
The friends pleaded not guilty to outraging public decency when they appeared at Worthing Magistrates Court on Wednesday.
The case will go to Chichester Crown Court for trial.
Tim Loughton, MP for East Worthing and Shoreham, said: "I think a lot of people might justifiably question whether the police have boobed in getting their priorities right in this case.
"While we do not want to see this sort of behaviour turn into an epidemic which could offend the sensitivities of some people, is it right to devote serious police resources to what on the face of it appears to have been a case of high jinks on a beach on one of the rare occasions this summer when it has been possible to bare any flesh at all?
"I am sure the police are stretched enough with the great many other serious crimes that local people want them to tackle without getting distracted by cases such as this."

Why has no-one mentioned the one really and truly on-topic Argus entry?

http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/localnews/display.var.1629803.0.is_school_discipline_in_decline.php

A deputy headteacher downloaded sick videos of young girls being raped, a court heard today.
Nigel Jackson's computer contained 3,300 images of child abuse when police seized it.
The former Seaford Head Community College deputy head had video clips of titles which included Trip to Thailand, American Pie Vicky and Child Lover.
After a hearing at Hove Crown Court Jackson was allowed to walk free because he had already served a four year sentence for other sex offences.
The court heard how he had been jailed in 2006 for grooming and abusing a teenage girl in Northern Ireland.
The teacher contacted the 14-year-old victim over the internet.
Jackson, 50, who served only a fraction of the four year sentence, duped the County Derry teenager into thinking he was a 15-year-old schoolboy.
He persuaded her to perform sexual acts for him in front of a webcam.
Jackson travelled to her home town after she agreed to meet him in 2005.
He indecently assaulted her after persuading her to go for a drive with him.
Police later raided his home in Bowden Rise, Seaford, and seized three computers.
They contained more than 3,300 images of child abuse, including video clips.
He was jailed for four years at Londonderry Crown Court for the grooming offences in 2006.
Sussex Police were unable to prosecute him for possessing the pictures until after his release last year.
At Hove Crown Court yesterday Jackson pleaded guilty to ten charges of possessing indecent images of children.
Karen Holt, prosecuting, said the video clips had titles which included Trip to Thailand, American Pie Vicky and Child Lover.
They contained horrific scenes of girls of 15 and under being raped and sexually abused.
Miss Holt said: "The defendant was deputy head of a school in this area.
"He resigned in 2003 after concerns arose about inappropriate e-mail contact with a girl but no proceedings followed.
"At the time he was arrested for these matters he was again working as a teacher in West Sussex.
"He fully accepts that he downloaded the images and has co-operated fully with the police.
"Officers here were not allowed to visit him while he was in custody in Northern Ireland.
"That is why these matters have taken so long to come to court.
"He accepts that he has a severe problem as far as sexual interest in young girls of 13, 14, and 15 is concerned."
The court heard that Jackson has already been ordered to register as a sex offender for life.
He has also been banned from working with children under 17 or having direct contact with them.
Jackson is also barred from using the internet to contact children indirectly through chatrooms and websites.
Paul Walker, defending, said: "He will find it extremely difficult to find employment.
"He hopes he has a future as a writer and had a book published while he was in prison in Northern Ireland."
Jackson was given a three year supervised community order.
He must also take part in a sex offenders' treatment programme and pay £2,000 costs.
Judge Paul Tain said: "Were you to appear in ordinary circumstances for this package of offences you would have received a custodial sentence of between 12 and 24 months.
"However, this case does not call out for that because these offences were being committed at exactly the same time as those in Northern Ireland.
"As a result a different approach should in my view be taken.
"Although the offences entirely justify a custodial sentence the proper way to deal with you is by way of a community order.
"You have served a prison sentence and I doubt you would have got a longer sentence if these offences had been before the court at the same time.
"The best mechanism for protecting the people who need protecting from you is to require you to undertake further treatment."
Jackson's case caused a storm in 2006 after it emerged he was allowed to teach at three Sussex schools after he was allowed to resign from Seaford Head Community College.
No proceedings were brought against him for inappropriate contact with a 14-year-old girl via e-mail in 2003.
A loophole in the law allowed him to get agency work in other Sussex schools from July 2004 until April 2005.
He managed to get work at Durrington High School, Littlehampton Community College and the now closed East Brighton College of Media and Arts.
He was cleared to teach even though warnings about his behaviour had been sent to the Department of Education.
A year later he was arrested for offences against the 14-year-old girl in Northern Ireland.
Jackson refused to comment as he left Hove Crown Court yesterday.
A Sussex Police Spokesman said a decision had been taken to prosecute Jackson for possessing the images despite the four year jail sentence he received.
He added: "We will continue to monitor his activities."
Jackson now lives in approved housing in Fareham, Hampshire.

Pensioner, 78, flashes 700 times in 60 years
By Ali Cridland

A body-worshipping 78-year-old has been jailed after flashing at strangers every month for SIXTY YEARS.
Julien Duffy has exposed himself up tp 700 times over six decades and considers his body a temple, a court heard.
On the last occasion he "accidently" let his towel slip from his waist in front of a neighbour in Brighton as he went to collect the post.
He refuses to take medication to tackle his problem because he believes his body should not be polluted by drugs.
At Lewes Crown Court the pensioner admitted indecent exposure and was sentenced to 26 weeks in jail.
The court heard because he has been held in custody since his arrest in October last year it is expected Duffy, who lives in a flat in Lewes Road, will be released in the next few weeks.
And a judged conceded: "You will be released shortly, no doubt to offend again."
Sarah Lise Howe, prosecuting, said his neighbour was left shocked and distressed when she saw Duffy naked from the waist down.
She said: "He did nothing to cover himself up."
The court heard he has more than 20 previous convictions, including indecently assaulting a boy, gross indecency with children when he exposed himself in front of youngsters on a bus, plus eight other offences of indecent exposure.
Andrew Stephens, defending, said about the latest offence: "It was just a flash. The incident was over quickly."
Mr Stephens said Duffy wanted help for his problems but he was not willing to take prescribed medication. He said: "His body he worships and does not want to put drugs in it. He wants to have therapy."
The court heard Duffy told probation officers he started exposing himself at the age of 18 and since then has committed the offence about once a month to men, women and children.
Judge Anthony Scott-Gall told him: "Again, sadly, you stand in the dock convicted of indecent exposure.
"You quite deliberately decided to go down clad in a towel which, as ever, happened to fall from around your midriff.
"You are somebody who is determined, whenever the urge takes you, to expose your genitalia to anyone in range. You have no shame and no desire to curb this rather unpleasant criminality. You have been sent to prison over the years and it has had no impact whatsoever.
"You will be released shortly, no doubt to offend again."

The judge's other claim to fame is that he stated in his summing up: "We have a duty to stamp out all of this spanking" when we were prosecuted in 1996 for sending 'indecent' Janus spanking magazines to our customers through the post!

Unfortunately, there are no pictures of the stamping-out judge on the Internet, but here is today’s big story in the Argus.

Fifty teens turn sleepover into house party horror
By Richard Gurner

A couple who left their teenage daughter at home thinking she was having a quiet sleepover with friends returned to find their house had been trashed by more than 50 teens.

Julia and Robert Anscomb were stunned to discover £5,000 worth of damage at their semi in Alberta Road, Durrington.

The couple found drugs throughout the house, discovered that up to six people had used their marital bed and that dozens of phone calls were made on their landline.

As well as two laptops, an iPod and a leather jacket stolen, totalling £2,000 they also found underwear in their eight-year-old daughter's bed.

Much to their horror, the pair also found their dog comatose on the kitchen floor after being fed a cocktail of drugs.

Mrs Anscomb's 15-year-old daughter Gemma has gone to ground at a friend's house and is refusing to come home.

Were you at the party? Was it as bad as people say? Call 01273 544514 or email news@theargus.co.uk

Gone are the good old days where you would go to an airport to catch a plane
Someone should have warned this man check in times take forever, or was it a case of waiting for missing luggage to arrive

Ketta

87-year-old paedophile escapes jail
By Sam Underwood

A one-eyed paedophile has become the country's oldest convicted sex attacker - at 87.
War veteran Terry Bown shuffled into court with a stick, wearing a toupé and an eye patch, as two of his victims looked on.
The court was told how Bown abused three young boys over three decades, and even tried to blackmail one of their fathers to keep him quiet.
There were gasps as the elderly pervert was spared jail because of his age, despite pleas from his victims for him to be locked up.
As the octogenarian hobbled out of court one victim blasted: "I'm absolutely gutted. It doesn't matter how old he is, he should be locked up in prison for what he has done."
Bown, of Waterloo Street, Hove, pleaded guilty at Lewes Crown Court yesterday to four counts of sexual assault and one of witness intimidation.
The charges, which go back as far as the late Seventies, relate to two brothers and a third boy.
Bown, a retired painter and decorator who served in Burma during the Second World War and was awarded the Burma Star medal, admitted abusing the two brothers when they were aged eight and nine.
On both occasions he sexually assaulted the boys as they lay in their beds while he was babysitting for them.
Several years later he abused one of the brothers again on a number of occasions by groping him.
The fourth charge relates to an incident in 2000, when Bown gave the third boy, then aged 12, a £5 note and several coins along with a sexually explicit note before indecently assaulting him.
When Bown was charged with the offences against the third boy, he tried to blackmail the boy's father into dropping the allegations by sending him a letter along with photographs of the father naked with another man.
Bown, who was given a custodial sentence in the early Sixties for dishonesty after trying to use falsified documents to withdraw money from a post office, was described as an "old curmudgeon" by his defence barrister Richard Barton.
Mr Barton used the term to account for the way Bown, who is blind in one eye, had acted in interviews with the probation service, which had found him difficult and recommended he was sent to prison.
Sentencing Bown, Judge Richard Haywood said the offences were serious and would warrant an immediate custodial sentence in any other case but that Bown's was mitigated by his age. He was given a two-year sentence suspended for two years for the assaults on the brothers, a 12- month sentence suspended for two years for the assault on the third boy and a 12-month sentence suspended for two years for intimidating a witness.
All will run concurrently and Bown will be on the sex offenders' register for ten years.
Outside court, one of the brothers said: "I feel we have not got justice. No one has got justice.
"I was absolutely gutted because he got away with it and was able to walk free because of his age.
"That's not right. There's a man out there who's walking around that is a paedophile.
"It doesn't matter how old he is, he should be locked up."

Tune: Memory
Shoreham - it can be quite exciting
Twenty-five women fighting
On a Saturday night...

Women gangs in mass brawl at Shoreham station
By Miles Godfrey

More than 25 women went beserk in a mass brawl just inches from live railway tracks.
The huge punch-up between two rival teenage gangs, one of which was travelling to a nearby fun fair, left two girls needing hospital treatment.
Police say some of those involved used snooker balls wrapped inside socks to club their opponents around the head.
Other items which could have been used as weapons were also discovered littered around the area and on train tracks in the aftermath of the brawl.
It began on the platform at Shoreham train station but spilled onto the railway tracks, endangering the lives of those fighting and also those of people travelling on late night trains.
Officers arrested two women, an 18-year-old and a 20-year-old, both from the Brighton area on suspicion of causing affray.
The pair were bailed to report to Worthing police station on May 17.
A spokeswoman for British Transport Police said: "It was a pretty big fight.
"It began when one group of women got off the train at Shoreham and came into contact with the other group who were waiting at the station. We don't know what sparked it at the moment."
The train arrived on the westbound platform around 10.30pm on Saturday night.
Fighting initially took place on the station but quickly spilled onto the railway line.
It is thought one of the groups attempted to back away from the fight but were followed onto the line.
Two women, a 17-year-old and an 18-year-old, who police said were from the local area, needed treatment at Worthing Hospital for their injuries.
The pair were said to have sustained bruising and cuts.
Both were kept in for observation overnight and released on Sunday.
It is thought the group of women who got off the train at Shoreham were heading to the fun fair being held around half a mile away on land south of Shoreham Airport.
The British Transport Police spokeswoman said: "They were trespassing on the railway line during the fight.
"It appears as though one of the groups was trying to get away but were chased or followed and the fight continued."
The spokeswoman was unable to confirm whether the fight had been prearranged or was spontaneous.
British Transport Police officers from Brighton were sent to the scene and managed to break up those still fighting.
Sussex Police helicopter was also sent to the scene later in the evening and spotted some of the women still hanging around the station area.
Trains were still running in both directions as the fight ensued.
However no disruption was caused to the railway network.
British Transport Police are appealing for witnesses of the fight or anyone with information about it to contact officers on 0800406040, quoting the serial 677/12/4.

Kinky teacher, kinky dentist, kinky lawyer, kinky policeman, kinky nurse - they’re all in the ARGUS!

Nurse caught on tape offering sex services
By Simon Barrett

A nurse was caught on tape offering sexual services while in uniform, a hearing was told.
Lynsey Brown, 34, from Hailsham, was still in her work clothes and showing off her name badge when a journalist from a national newspaper turned up at her home after contacting her through an adult website.
Brown, who was working at the Conquest Hospital in St Leonards and the nearby Churchwood Medical Practice, agreed to have sex with the reporter for £120.
But he was wired for sound and equipped with a secret camera to record the meeting.
The Nursing and Midwifery Council (NMC) yesterday heard how Brown had set up a web page featuring explicit pictures with hourly and overnight rates for a range of sexual services.
At the time of the scandal Brown was due to take up a new high profile job as Community Matron with Hasting and St Leonards NHS Primary Care Trust (PCT).
But the she had to retract her acceptance of the post after her secret sideline was exposed on April 24, 2005.
Clare Strickland, for the NMC, said: "It is plain that Ms Brown was using her professional status as a nurse when advertising and selling sexual services.
"That was done at all stages of the process. Her conduct at the very least reinforces the negative sexual stereotypes of nursing and is therefore damaging to the profession."
A member of the public had tipped off the Sunday People after they spotted Brown's personal profile clearly stating she was a nurse on an internet site called Adultwork.
Brown openly identified herself as a "professional nurse" and "senior nurse" on the site.
The page listed her personal information and preferred sexual practices, along with contact details and explicit pictures.
The committee, sitting in London, heard that after the article was printed the PCT held an investigatory meeting with Brown about the expose.
Miss Strickland added: "Ms Brown said she was the victim of a smear campaign and suggested the article was 'a stitch up' and was untrue.
"She said she had not sold sexual services and that the website was a legitimate dating site."
The PCT decided the defer Browns starting date for her new job so they could investigate further.
On April 26 2005 a disciplinary hearing took place at the Churchwood Medical Practice where Brown was serving out her notice period before taking up her new job.
She denied she was a prostitute or escort and maintained the website was a legitimate dating site.
It was decided she would not return to work for the remainder of her notice period.
But the next day Brown contacted the PCT to retract her acceptance of the post of community matron.
Brown, who is not attending the hearing, admits allowing sexual, personal and explicit material to be entered on an internet website.
She further admits having discussed her nursing career with the reporter, accepted payment of £120 from him and agreed to provide him with sexual services at a later date.
Brown also admits her fitness to practice is impaired by reason of misconduct.

See also:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3EHmnF0PYY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXiTjpTLczU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-g4WqmiHXzc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bGjHy1lXpnI

‘The Beast of Bevendean’ is a Dalmatian dog. Geddit?

Knowing that many of its readers are of an alternative persuasion, the ‘Argus’ has suggested appropriate books for Fathers’ Day.

The house of my friend Charmian (not ‘Charmaine’, as the ‘Argus’ would have it) features in today’s big story. Charmian, the proud but completely mad holder of an ASBO, is at the moment locked up in the Bin. For the sake of completeness, I walked to Grange Road this morning and took a photograph of the boarded-up drugs den.


Drugs den is closed down
10:12am Monday 21st July 2008
By Ben Parsons, Crime Reporter


A drugs den has been closed ending more than a decade of misery for neighbours.
Drug dealing and antisocial behaviour forced parents in Grange Road, Hove, to keep their children indoors and made it difficult for people to sell their homes.
The street was terrorised for years by late-night shouting and threats of violence from the house’s owner before squatters moved in and turned the terraced property into a heroin den.
Residents are now celebrating after police used powers under the Antisocial Behaviour Act to board up the house and forbid anyone to go inside for three months.
One 48-year-old neighbour said: “People are well pleased. Hopefully it is over now but it has taken a long time.”
The house belongs to Charmaine McCormack, 64, who was given an Asbo in October 2006.
Neighbours said they could not let their children play outside for fear of abuse being hurled at them.
When she left, squatters took over and drug dealing became common. Witnesses said cars would park around the corner in Kingsthorpe Road and wait for a dealer to bring out drugs.
A man in his 30s, who was living at the Grange Road address, is on police bail on suspicion of drug dealing.
Police and council officers were granted a “closure order” on Friday after a hearing at Brighton Magistrates’ Court.
Officers arrived at about 7pm to nail boards over the doors and windows of the property.

Teacher quizzed over spy camera

11:30am Saturday 20th September 2008

By Ben Parsons

A teacher has been arrested after shop security guards watched a man filming up women’s skirts.
James Parke, a media teacher at Brighton, Hove and Sussex Sixth Form College (BHASVIC), was questioned by police after being stopped at a shopping centre on the first day of the new term.
Security guards at H&M clothes store in Churchill Square shopping centre told police they had seen a man in the store carrying a bag with long straps.
A camera lens had been aimed through a hole in the bag.
They believed it was being dangled close to the floor to film up women’s skirts.
The guards later confronted a man nearby in Western Road.
Parke, 40, was later arrested on suspicion of committing a public order offence.
He has not been charged with any crime.
He has worked for more than ten years at BHASVIC in Dyke Road, Hove.
The college has about 1,600 male and female students, mostly aged between 16 and 18, on its roll.
It confirmed that Parke was an employee at the time of his arrest but that he had stopped working at the college.
Until today no official announcement had been made to parents, staff or pupils about the incident, on police advice.
BHASVIC principal Chris Thomson told The Argus: “I can confirm that BHASVIC has been co-operating very fully with Sussex Police on a matter which cannot, at this moment, be specified.
“I can also confirm that a member of staff connected with this matter is no longer employed by this college.”
A spokesman for Sussex Police said: “A 40-year-old man from Brighton was arrested at the H&M store on September 1 for an offence under the Public Order Act.
“The man was interviewed by police and released on bail, pending further inquiries, until December 2.”
In June, The Argus reported how a commuter was spared jail after detectives found 58 photos of women taken on trains and at work.
Marketing manager Guy Knight, of The Esplanade, Seaford, was fined £500 and ordered to pay £500 costs.
A judge refused an application for an antisocial behaviour order to stop him travelling on trains between Lewes and Seaford and carrying a camera with a mobile phone.
In 2005, barrister Simon Hamilton was found guilty of outraging public decency by secretly filming up the skirts of women in supermarkets in Chichester.
He was sentenced to three years and nine months in prison but had the term reduced to three years after an appeal.

Brighton college tutor charged with spying on girls in toilets at BHASVIC

4:27pm Saturday 13th December 2008
By Nigel Freedman


A teacher charged with filming up womens skirts has also been accused of spying on female students in the toilets of a Brighton college.

Yesterday a judge banned James Parke, 40 from having a mobile phone or any video or recording equipment in public while he waits for his committal to crown court.

Parke was arrested after a man was seen by security staff filming up womens skirts in Churchill Square, Brighton.

He is now also alleged to have secretly filmed female students in the toilets at Brighton, Hove and Sussex VI Form College (BHASVIC).

Parke, who was a media studies teacher at the college, resigned from his post after his arrest in September.
He did not enter a plea on charges of voyeurism and outraging public decency when he appeared before District Judge Graham Parsons at Brighton Magistrates Court yesterday.

Parke sat with his head in his hands fighting back tears at the back of the court as he waited for his case to be called.

It is alleged that he committed lewd and obscene acts which outraged public decency in Brighton between September 2, 2006, and September 1, 2008, by taking up-skirt pictures.

He is also charged with voyeurism between January 1 and September 1 at BHASVIC.

It is alleged he recorded persons doing private things with the intention of looking at recorded images for the purpose of sexual gratification.

Edmund Fish, defending, said Parke would not enter a plea and asked for the case to be committed to crown court.
Parke, of Kingscote Way, Brighton, was given bail until the committal hearing takes place at Brighton Magistrates Court on February 6.

District Judge Parsons banned him from going to BHASVIC or any other educational establishment until then.
He must not teach anyone under the age of 18.

HeiferCow is not popular here in Hove and her taking over this café from the present owner, Nick (Laugh-a-minute) Short, will ensure its permanent closure within six months of reopening.

I read it's going to be vegan. About 2% of the population is vegan. She will be closed within a year.

The word on the beach is that this thirsty parasite (real name Quentin Cook) is experiencing marital discord with giantess Zoe Somebody. He and HeiferCow are neighbours. Are they about to embark upon one of the most gruesome unions ever contracted in the Southern Counties?

"Look out! The headmistress is coming with her cane."

"Trust that teacher's pet Felicity to be the first to get into position!"

"Every day's an open day for Jennifer."

http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/4363117.Heather_Mills_reveals_name_of_new_Hove_restaurant/?ref=mr

I shall be attending the Grand Opening later this year and am certain to be tempted by the mouth-watering, finger-lickin'-good tarts on offer.

Sorry to hijack your thread John but that roof looks neglected. Do Brits generally paint first then replace a roof?

Can we expect a "food critics" report later this year?

You are right about the roof, Bob. The word on the beach is that the money Heifer got from someone who used to be in the Beatles was only sufficient to patch it up. I will walk down to the lagoon within the next few days and take some photographs from a different angle.

I am thrilled to bits about the Grand Opening and will certainly be writing to tell you about those delicious tinned grapefruit segments swimming in sugared water and topped with great globules of synthetic cream fresh from Mr. Patel's recently deinfested corner shop at only £17.99p a throw.

North side

South side

East side

West side

She would have a hard time selling me grapefruit at any price. I don't like them. I realize they probably don't grow in England but that price is outrageous.

You should send your pics of the roof to the building inspectors. LOL

http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/4376026.Man_pictured_throwing_dog_into_Hove_waves_speaks_out/

Is this a man you would allow to throw your dog, your wife or your servant into the sea?

Is the ARGUS a newspaper you would even wish your wife or servants to read?

Page 3 has been chosen for the report of the opening of the VBites café at Hove Lagoon.

The headline is

Open for business!

A photograph of the owner holding a lump of cake at chest height reads:

Heather offers up a tasty treat for her patrons

This outrage occurred at Pennthorpe School in West Sussex. The School's motto is 'Putting the fun into the fundamentals'.

Piggy-back sex pest admits Brighton and Hove offences
9:00am Saturday 22nd August 2009

By Alison Cridland


A 43-year-old man has admitted sexually assaulting teenage girls he persuaded to give him a piggy-back by pretending he had a bad leg.

Kieron Bobbette also jumped on another young girls back without warning as she walked along the street.

At Lewes Crown Court yesterday Bobbette, of Victory Mews, Brighton Marina, admitted five charges of sexual assault.

His victims were aged between 13 and 17.

They were approached by Bobbette on the streets of Brighton and Hove between June 2004 and November last year.

The court was told that Bobbette had not assaulted his victims in an indecent manner but that none of them had wanted him to touch them.

Constance Briscoe, prosecuting, told the court: "He commits sexual assault by approaching young ladies, usually under the age of 18, pretending he has a bad leg and an ache in his groin, and invites them to give him a piggy-back.

Ms Briscoe said one victim complained Bobbette had forced her to give him a piggy-back and when he was being carried he asked her to do squat bends with him on her back.

She said he jumped on another victim's back. She said: "She didn't know him and she didn't consent."

Speaking from the dock before he entered his guilty pleas, Bobbette asked the judge: "Can somebody commit sexual assault without knowing they are doing this because I don't feel I have?"

After Bobbette admitted the offences Judge Richard Brown adjourned sentencing until October 13.

He ordered a pre-sentence report to be drawn up as well as a psychological assessment.

Bobbette was granted bail on condition he makes no contact with girls under 19 without reasonable cause.

An application by the prosecution for a further condition that he does not ask young girls to give him a piggy-back was refused.

Bobbette denied two further charges of sexually assaulting young girls in January this year and the prosecution agreed to offer no evidence. The two charges will remain on the court file.

Assistant head at Brighton school accused of looking at child porn
10:20pm Thursday 3rd September 2009

By Emily Walker, Chief Reporter


An assistant head teacher has been removed from his post after being accused of looking at child pornography.

Parents of pupils from Brighton's Dorothy Stringer High School, received letters yesterday morning informing them that assistant head teacher Ken Browne had left his post, after being arrested on suspicion of possessing indecent images of children.

The letter, from chair of the school governors Reg Hook said: "A member of school staff, Ken Browne, was arrested on July 24, 2009 on suspicion of possessing indecent images of children.

"I am able to advise you that he no longer works at the school.

"I am aware that this information may cause parents concern and I would like to reassure parents that the Governing body and staff at the school are working in co-operation with and with support from the local authority and police.

"Should either you or your child have any particular concerns arising from this issue, I would advise that in the first instance contact Brian Orrells, acting headmaster, or Suzanne Lewis, assistant head of pastoral care.

Parents were told that the alleged offences did not involve any past or present pupils from the school, but council child services staff would be at the school for the next few weeks in case any students were upset.

The allegations are believed to have come to light as part of an ongoing police investigation by Sussex Police's child protection unit and related to images downloaded from the internet.

Mr Browne was an assistant head teacher and head of languages at the school.

In January 2007 he was chosen as one of 25 ambassadors for British schools in Europe for an exchange project organised by the Foreign Office.

Sussex Police confirmed they were investigating, but would not release any further details about how the alleged offences came to light.

A spokeswoman for Brighton police said: "A 59-year-old Brighton man has been arrested on suspicion of possession of indecent images of children.

"The man is a senior staff member form the Dorothy Stringer school.

"The police investigation does not relate to any past or present pupils of the Dorothy Stringer school."

Police would not reveal the nature of the images concerned or say how many pictures he is accused of possessing.

A spokesman for Brighton and Hove City Council said: "Due to the ongoing nature of this investigation, Brighton & Hove City Council is unable to comment beyond the facts laid out in a letter to parents and carers this week.

"However, we can confirm that the council is working with governors and staff to provide information and support to children and their parents and carers about the matter."

Neither the school or council would confirm whether Mr Browne had been permanently sacked or suspended from his post.