@ Adviser, by reading your post It seems like you are getting no respect from people you expected to. Could it be you are paying the price of being disrespectful to other lot. Kids pick very little from what have being taught by their parents and the higher margin is how they want it to be. Have you ever being in a situation where a child just do the exact opposite that you have asked them to do. Not because they are not aware of it, but that's the way they want it to be. Kids do not always pick the disrespect from their parents, but it also depends on a kid as an individual. Didn't you know some of the burglars/ thieves come from the most wealthy backgrounds that you could ever think of. This kids get everything right from childhood that you can dream of , yet they go breaking into people houses to steal small household items. Would you still blame their parents in such instances?
Others have being raised in religious backgrounds yet they are alcoholic or either turn to prostitution. so did they pick that from their parents? In my opinion you are making a big mistake saying kids learn to be disrespectful from their parents. A parent is the last person who wants to see their kids naughty and would do anything possible to change them if they can.Some families have the most notorious kids yet they have being brought up like the other siblings by the same parents, disciplined the same but they are just different.
Its always advisable to discover the priceless art of seeing the glass half full rather than about to be knocked over.I disagree with you when you say husbands allow their wives to speak to their parents in unacceptable way. No man or woman would allow that! And if it happens, it is due to unavoidable circumstances. Parents/ Siblings(P/S) sometimes force and demand the husband/wife to sway by their opinions and do contrarily to what they think is right as partners. For instance if spouse A take sides with spouse B, then P/S becomes offended and spouse B takes the whole blame. They assume B is a control freak. the P/S forgets that it's always an agreement btwn the partners. The P/S do expect explanations from A , if that does not happen then its assumed that A, is encouraging B to disrespect P/S. In that case the partners have a right to stand firm on the ground regardless of how the P/S takes it. In most cases the spouse B is usually blamed for whatever reason and resentment and malicious prejudices are spread. And that's when the disrespect comes in from both sides( from spouse B and the P/S).They turn their backs on each other and no one respects the other, and every word said by either of them is taken offensively as statistics are changed and twisted making things look bad than they seem to be. Some even try to inter relate events with what happenings to prove their points!This is due to misunderstandings.
The P/S mostly create grudges out of petty issues.The husband /wife sees the sweet enthusiasm of each other, while the P/S sees weirdness and DISRESPECT. If that's what we call disrespect then so be it. No ones wants to be called MR/MRS so and so yet your own family is run and controlled by family members. That's unacceptable! Anyone's OWN family that is (wife/ husband & kids) will always win if you have to chose between P/S and own family. That's a bitter truth that P/S don't accept.
Am Urging all P/S to all accept and embrace that!You being the parent that raised A,siblings B and C. You brought them all up, showered them with love which is priceless and gifts. Made them respect your other better half, then let your own kids pass to their own, Meaning Its now A's turn to do the same. To shower love to the better half and kids without interference. I would think that A'S kids would not respect anyone who they think is taking away what they value. I Suppose its their both parents love!I wouldn't! lets not try to blame each other in this aspect of disrespect but lets all be the good example to set.