Thinking of you, I am SO sorry!!May 1 2012 at 7:28 AM
|teresa (no login)|
Response to Coping with First Loss (PG and M/C mentioned), TMI
I am truly sorry for your loss. I know the pain and heartbreak you are feeling all too well and it's very difficult and very sad. Big hug to you.
As far as coping, there are many stages of grief, from sadness and crying constantly to getting mad, to wanting to know why and to having to accept that you may never know or understand why. My last loss hit me very very hard and for me, I cried every day for the entire year up to the date I was due. I don't want to scare you saying that, I just took it very hard. Now, I am a month past that date and I am feeling better mentally but everyone is different.
There are things I want to say to you about what I experienced in my own losses but I don 't want to upset you. So I will tell you that the best advice I can give you is that you need to ALLOW yourself to grieve and move through it at your own time. It's a huge loss. The other piece of advice I have is this: do NOT let anyone trivialize it because sad to say, there are people who may mean well but their words will still hurt you. I could write lists of things people said to me and it made me want to SCREAM. I had to distance myself from certain people, so choose your company very carefully and remember one thing, you have the right to grieve and not be surrounded by anyone who says anything to upset you further.
I do think it's a positive sign that you conceived naturally. Many lucky women go on soon after a loss to get pg again and have a healthy pregnancy. I pray you are one of them.
As for the bleeding, the first loss I had I bled very heavily for almost two weeks. My last loss, I had to have a D+C because I never bled at all. Went in for my 8 week u/s and after seeing a heartbeat at 6 weeks and 2 days, found there was no growth after 6 weeks and 4 days. And almost one year later, I still wonder what went wrong and why. I had testing done and still no answers.
Keeping you in my prayers, I am truly sorry for you.
- Thanks, Teresa - BrewersFan on May 1, 10:01 AM