My name is Jen and I just discovered this site. What a blessing to find someone so willing to give advice and offer spiritual direction- thank you

I have a question I was hoping you could help me with.
I've been involved with a man from Scotland for a little over 2 yrs now. I met him when I lived in Ireland and we had a great and passionate love affair.
He told me he loved me almost immediately and I felt the same. We were together for 3 months and his mom suddenly was diagnosed with cancer. He moved back to Scotland to be with her and had a difficult time.I was finding it hard to make it in a foreign country alone with no friends or family. We had a falling out and I had to move back to the states. I kept in touch with him through e mails and we finally started to talk again and have talked every week for sometimes 4 hours at a time. We made plans for him to come and visit my son and I here in the US, and so he did for the month of Oct 2003. Before he left we talked about our future- he seemed very torn between starting a new life here and returning to Scotland. He is very close to his mom (and rightly so) she is basically his only family. He began to tear up one day and said that there was nothing he could do - he couldnt leave his mom - i told him I would never ask him to. He had been seeing a girl there, but he said it was just for companionship. We have not talked much since he left and its breaking my heart. He says I am his best friend and noone but his mom has ever known him as I do, He says he has so much respect for me. But, he keeps talking about us now as if we are going to be "friends" and thats all. I don't understand and I feel that he is afraid of what his feelings are. I know that he loves me, but will he come out of his shell and tell me truly why he is pulling away? Or what hes thinking really? I am trying not to sway his feelings or manipulate things. Im trying to give him space and time to work things out for the best- even if that doesnt include me-I meditate for about 5 minutes a day and send him light and love without asking the powers that be to "make" him love me or come back. But I am afraid I'm going to lose him if I don't continue to tell him how I feel. I pray for patience and for my angels to show me what I need to do. I miss him terribly and I miss us talking and laughing together on the phone- he became my best friend. I know this is long but wanted to give you as much as I could - please, if you can give me any insight as to what your impressions are. Am I holding on to something that will never be again? Is he struggling with this or has he let it go? thank you so much-- Love to you

Jen