This post is not meant to flame anyone. I simply feel a need to voice my concern about this show ("Who's Your Daddy?"). I have always respected and admired Ms. Hughes as an actress. While I do not hold her responsible for this program (a job is a job), I hope that she will reconsider her involvement with this rather offensive show.
I am an adoptee, reunited with my birthmother and searching for my birthfather. I find this program exploitative and offensive on several counts. Firstly, because "real" parents are not the ones that conceive a child. "Real" parents are the ones who raise a child. As an adoptee, I know full well who my "Daddy" is. He's the person that tucked me into bed and sang me to sleep. He's the one that played with me, etc. The man who impregnated my birthmother is not, nor will he ever be, my "Daddy."
Secondly, this show reinforces the notion of secrecy that has always surrounded adoption. As an adopted person, my records were sealed. The state decided that, unlike a "normal" person, I have no right to know who gave birth to me. In the state where my adoption took place, the only way to get access to my records is through a court appointed intermediary and only if I can show "good cause". Then the court will allow the intermediary to look at my records, but not me. The intermediary can see the names, etc. I can't. Sort of like this show... the people producing the show can know the details of this woman's history, but she is once again kept in the dark.
I can only hope that if this program is aired, it will cause the uproar and momentum needed to make necessary changes to our adoption search and reunion laws, and finally allow us all to have equal access to our records. Maybe then no adoptees will ever again have to make fools of themselves on national television, because they have no other way to find their roots.
Posted on Dec 18, 2004, 12:12 PM from IP address 24.16.133.224