If you are divorced, why did you end your marriage?

Please use this section to express your thoughts or feelings about how your relationship with OM affected your attitude towards your marriage, your feelings towards your husband, or your desire/ability to end your marriage.

As stated previously, I ended my marriage because I had had 'enough'. The fact that I was involved with MM at the time had nothing to do with the decision. He was totally taken by surprise when I told him that I was divorcing H. I did assure him that I would not be pressuring him to leave his W, and I never did. I just told him that he had 'rights of first refusal'if and when I decided to see a single man.
I don't think my relationship with MM really affected my decisions, they were totally mine.

Like Angel, I also had enough in my marriage, my divorce had nothing to do with any of my affairs. I divorced under my conditions, no one elses.

I ended my marriage because I realized that my now exH was having multiple affairs on the internet and in real life and I had lost respect both for him and myself through both of my EMRs. I wanted a normal life where people came home and actually enjoyed their spouses company, I wanted to feel content and actually watch a movie with my significant other without thinking about somone else or wishing I was somewhere else. I was tired of living a lie and wanted a relationship with somone I could trust and be friends and lovers with. I have since found this man and we both have made a vow (his exW cheated on him) that if something was to happen where one of us was not happy any longer that there would not be any cheating. We would simply ask out of the relationship as we both feel that the hurt of betrayal is not worth the pain that causes both partner... since even the person who is cheating suffers from the struggle. imho.

was maried for fifteen years. the last two years of my marriage i was in an EMR. he was my "knight" in shining armor, come to save me from my hopeless and lonely marriage. as time went on, i fell less in love with the h and more in love with the mm. in reality i was truly NOT in love with either. the affair allowed me to see what was truly wrong with my marriage and helped me to end it. i did not leave for the mm, in fact, i left the mm within two months of ending the marriage. it was a classic case of an exit affair.

unfortunately the mm stalked me for nearly a year afterwards. it was ugly and quite typical of them.

shortly following mm # 1 came mm#2 who was different(!!!!!!!!). an old friend who became more. treated me well, took me all over the world, bought me gifts, but still was a man i could only call when wife was away. i was still second best. when i realised he was the same wolf in sheep's clothing as mm# 1, i ended it. i truly felt like i haad played the role of classic mistress with this one. i knew all their tricks by now and the roles i played in perpetuating them.

i am now with a wonderful single man who loves me dearly and we plan on being married in the near future. i am no longer second best. i am number one!! yee haw!!

I was engaged to be married when I met MM. I was VERY unhappy with him, but I din't know it until I met MM. He made me realize what I was missing and I got out before I made the fatal mistake of marrying an idiot!

I'd like to say I didn't leave my H for my MM. My marriage was already in the crapper before I ever went out looking for "something" in my life that became my EMR and had even asked my H for an "open" marriage. Still, I don't think I would have had the strength to leave my H when I did if not for my MM. We were just over 6mos into our A when I moved out.

On the otherhand, within that 1st 6mos of our EMR, I knew that I had truly fallen hard in love with him and he with me was obvious as well. There is a difference between loving someone and being "in love". While I still loved my husband of 16yrs, I had not been in love with him for some time.

So, maybe it was both.

I chose to divorce my H for reasons still questionable to me.
I met MM when I had been married less than a year and we fell in love. I could not understand how I could be feeling the way I was when I gave my heart to someone else already. MM had been married 2 1/2 years and we shared similar stories... our spouses were both our High School Sweethearts.

When my H found out about MM and I, I wasn't devastated, just confused. We wound up seperating and getting back together several times before it came down to divorce. Our divorce was filed and we were no longer living together when I started having second thoughts. We filed for an extension and tried to work things out. Well, with MM still in the picture, you can figure out why it didn't work.

Finally, we received the letter that the extension was complete and a new date was set. Feeling hurt, we agreed it would be best for us. Although my husband didn't know MM was still in the picture, he still struggled with the past.

I went through with the divorce because I didn't think that I was being true to myself or my H by loving someone else the way I did. I didn't want anyone but MM, and he was the only man I ever knew who could make me feel the way he did. We were the best of friends and he knew me inside and out. Aside from the great love making, he expressed his emotions in ways that I could totally relate and we shared the same interests. We exchanged notes, shared meanings behind love songs, had great communication, and enjoyed doing the exact same things. My H and I didn't have mind blowing sex, we never wrote our feelings out on paper, he didn't have the ability to listen to a song and relate, and most importantly - we had zero communication skills with eachother and no shared interests.
(Makes ya wonder why we married hah?)
I was comparing the relationships in making the decision.... huge mistake looking back.

I chose divorce because I thought that I deserved to be with someone who was more like me on a romantic and emotional level, while having the same goals in life that I did. x-H and I are still extremely close and sometimes I think I made a rash decision out of my desire to start a life with MM.

I feel horrible about the way I hurt my x-H, and think that maybe I am getting it returned 10 fold. Either way, I truly believe that if someone is having an A, the best thing to do is evaluate everything with careful consideration. I made a decision to let go of a man who was wonderful in a lot ways, and our issues probably could have been worked on and been resolved.

i was mow with a sg. i knew from our first date he meant the end of my marriage. he brought me alive, he put me on a "good" rollercoaster, he was attentive, caring and there. my h wasnt there.

we had d day, h came home early and found us watching tv together! we managed to bluster through that, but for me that was the turning point and about a month later i moved in with sg.
h wanted me to stay and work it out, but i had left the marriage the on my first date with sg.