How long have you been or were you with MM?

We were together for 9.5 years

It is going on four wonderful years with my MM.

7 years, off and on. i guess it was never over all those times before, when i said it was...but now i truly believe it is.

I have know him for 5 1/2 years and EMR for 5 years 2 months.

The relationship has evolved many times over during this time.

Thirteen wonderful years, just keeps getting better.

Will be 10 years this February

I first met him very briefly about nine years ago. Started working together 3 years ago. Began getting closer Aug 01, relationship probably started Oct 01, became intimate Dec 01 and still going strong.

It will be three years next month, and never had one single day of regret of us being part of each other's lives. He is very, very good to me and I adore him very much.

Guess I'm the odd woman out so far....6 weeks.

Almost one year. We just ended it.

We've been together for almost 5 years. He left his W 15 months ago.

We had known each other for about two years when the A started. It lasted for eight months, when I met a single guy and ended the A.

We've been 'seeing' each other for 6years 3months, with only one 3 month break.
Wife has finally left and we're working through the wierd, wonderful and confusing emotions that their seperation is causing.
Hopefully we'll be together for a very long time

we've been together just over 10 months, but he is moving out in 2 weeks...woohooo!

I know him 5 1/2 yrs. We've been together 4 years.

Met mid May 2002 and the last time I saw him was September 2nd, 2002. We have kept in touch, but he has been distancing himself from me lately.

19 years

Coming up to two years.

Mine lasted for almost 13 years. Has been over for 1 year

We were together off and on for about 7 years; now married for almost 3 years.

Wow... it lasted a year in the early 90's. We practically lived together (as odd as that might seem)! He was transfered due to his job, and we kept the emotional affair going until 1995. We "re-found" each other in 2000... and have been seeing each other off and on ever since.

We knew each other for 8 years before. There was always "something" there, but we both were married and didn't talk about it. EA lasted about 3 months, PA lasted 6 weeks. It ended when MM was busted.

19 wonderful months.

Three years and still counting.

I've been w/ MM 4 years.

6 MONTHES AND THEN THE W FOUND OUT AND THAT WAS IT. I DID NOT WANT TO LET GO. I TRIED TO KEEP IN CONTACT IN HOPES THAT HE WOULD LEAVE W TO BE WITH ME. HE NEVER DID LEAVE HER!!!

My first affair was an online one, we did meet twice offline and it lated nine months. My second affair I did meet him online in a chatroom and we just happened to live in the same area. So e-mail and messenger was a way for us to keep in touch for meetings. It lasted 20 months. My current affair is going on 6 months.

Friends-only for about 5 months. Lovers-- off and on-- for 5 months. Broken-up but still friends with him chasing me and trying to get me back for 4 months. Since his wife left him, we've been lovers again for about 2 months.

It lasted 5 years. I no longer see him or talk to him as I have divorced and remarried and have no need for him in my life. He is still married and probably still cheating

Our 'relationship' as it is today, began on July 4, 1999. Guess that makes it...just a smidgy more than 3 and a half years. I'm thinking that this is something that in any circle would be called a 'long term' relationship, no?

First day we kissed May 20th 2000
As of today we are together 3 yrs and 8 months roughly.

18 months. Time fly's.

We were together for two and a half years. We broke up for almost a year and are back in touch now. He got divorced while we were broken up.

We were together for about two and a half years. We split up for nine months. He got divorced during that time. We're back in touch, but not a couple and have been for the past couple weeks.

three years off and on in an emr.

known each other for 5.

been married for 10. he's been married for 9.

It has been about 8 months now.

We knew each other casually, and flirted outrageously, for a few years before we began seeing each other. It'll be five years next week since our first "date".

25months.

and, still counting it in months as i tell him 'happy anniversary baby' on the 10th of every month. we've decided that 'the honeymoon is over' the first 10th of a month that it slips my mind.

... almost a year, 11 months to be exact.

mj

Tgether 1 1/2 years, he left W after 1 year

11 years.

almost 2 yrs..it never should have gone past the first lay,but I was "different" and there ya go.

5 years

After about four years of him coming on to me, the affair lasted four months. What a waste of flirting!!

Maybe it was all about the chase?

Relationship lasted 5 yrs

it will be 6 mths next week.

we were friends for over 7 years. a year after my H died, we began our current relationship. We have been together about 2 years.

3 Years

MM #1 - will be 7 years in June, but we are pretty much over at this point.

MM #2 - 2 1/2 years and more in love every day!

An odd one to answer, because I met MM when I was in my early twenties, were together for around a year, then he ended it without any real explanation. It wasn't entirely unexpected: there was never any question of him leaving his W, although at the time it was probably what I wanted.

We got in touch again about 4 months ago, so that's a gap of over twenty years. He is still married to the same woman. They have no children, so I can't pretend there is any other reason except that he loves her. I am older now, not necessarily wiser (!) but have more self-knowledge, and I don't think I would want him 'full-time'. The strange thing is that the relationship just picked up again straight away, as if there had been no gap. I have never had any doubt that I love him absolutely, with a certainty that I have never had with anyone else.
We have not yet had sex, although we have spent the night together. The sex we used to have was wonderful, but it was so much more than that: we 'connect' in the head in a very rare way. Being with him again is both the best and the worst thing ever to happen. The strangest thing is the certainty, which is somehow reassuring, because I was right about it all along. I just try to get the most out of every minute we have, because I don't think it can last. It's too intense to continue as an EMR. I know he feels the same way. He says I'm 'the other half of his brain'!

We were together for 4 years.

Who knows if it is the end, as we have been NC for a week now.

Our affair lasted for a little over 3 years.

Just shy of 4 years.

We're going into our 5th year.

8 mos.....

4 years off and on
and off and on and off and on

I was in relationship with xMM for 2 1/2 years. It was too long and not long enough, at the same time.

Its been almost 3 years so far.

I'm going on 5 years. We have a little twist however, we've been married almost 3 of those years :D

Heading toward our 4th year! Lot of ups and downs. 1 D-day that ended things for almost 8 months, but we got back together.

EA started February 2001
PA started May 2001

Still together....

Been together for 3.3 years: EMR lasted 4 months, lived together after he left xW for two years and have been happily married almost 1 year.

my EMA has started a 1 1/2 ago and is still going strong

8.5 years and still going

it began in January of 2000 and is still going strong

we've been together for a little over two years, on and off at points.

We have known each other 9 years. We have been involved for the last 4 years. It is ending at this time.

My MM and I have been together for 13 months. Still going strong.

My MM and I have been together for exactly a year and a half and we're going strong. We've had really good times and we've had really bad times. Right now we're at a very strong point and decisions are being made for us to be together. I'm very happy with him. I've never loved anyone the way that I love him. I feel he is my first true love.

We met in 1991, I was about to start university and he was in his last semester. It was an overwhelming attraction from the moment our eyes met. We dated for a while, but the timing was off. I was so young and innocent and overprotected at 17 and he was more "worldly" at 22. I think I was scared of my feelings toward him (believe it or not, not only was I a virgen, I had only ever kissed one guy a couple of times) I never stopped thinking about him although we ended it horribly. We met again, through work the summer of 1998 and the attraction was just as strong. We became very close friends and he helped me through the ending of my marriage. I guess we started kissing etc that september and began a sexual afair on Dec 3rd. So it depends when you start counting but a little over 5 years. We broke up once for a few hours about 3 years about, but aside from that we are always together.

I was friends with him at first talking about problems with my xbf that lasted about 6 months. Then once the ex was out of the picture he was off and chasing me. Chased me for 2 months till I gave in. We lasted on and off for about 2 1/2 years until he just told his W during the start up of an on again period. So as it stands it's over.

We've known each other for 15 years, but have been involved for 13 1/2.

We've known each other for 4 years. EMR for 3.

1 and 1/2 years

We expressed our feelings for eachother a little over 2 years ago. As of Feb 2004 During this time, we had many times that we were alone that we didn't make love.

We have stopped being together since November, (mostly) a few hiccups....

It is hard to break it off. We haven't made love for a month. And only 3 times were we alone together since November.

We had long periods of time when we had stopped being physical, as long as 5 months once, but we ended up together again. That is not happening this time. It always ended up happening again because we would be alone and not have sex... then one of the times we were together, things would happen, and we would make love again. We just aren't even being alone together at all anymore.

Less than six months!!

We were together 7 years. We remain friends now, it's been 9 years all together since we met.

its been off and on for 9 years. It seems to be more "on" for the past year or so.

almost 2 years, but I'm getting ready to end it after the holidays.

we grew up in the same neighborhood.. became friends in 2000, became intimate in 2001, took a few breaks.. including a recent long 1 ( we've kept in touch.. but no sex for 11 months )and became intimate again recently ( janurary 2005 )

we grew up in the same neighborhood.. became friends in 2000, became intimate in 2001, took a few breaks.. including a recent long 1 ( we've kept in touch.. but no sex for 11 months )and became intimate again recently ( janurary 2005 )

I have been in love with him since I was twelve and just last month he told me he loved me for the first time.....I'm thirty three now, we are married to other people and managing an EX sometimes I wonder how and why I do it...then I remember being twelve and seeing him for the first time...

About 4 months continously so far. This is not including the "one-night" here and there about a year or so ago. I told him I wasn't going to do that anymore. It would either be continous or not at all. So it has been four months- so far- of continous communication, etc. Several daily calls, see each other several times/week. That kind of thing.

I've known him for 8 monthes and the A has been on and off for the last 4 monthes.

23 months

We have distanced ourselves for the last year, very little physical contact. We have been involved emotionally the whole time.

He just told his W he wants a divorce.

We were together 3 years and 2 months.

started out for 9 months online only, followed by 6 months of online and phone, to the past four months involving several long weekends together...we're still going.

My relationship is in its 3rd year.

At this time, we have been together for 7 months

We have been together 15 years with two 6 month breaks at my choice. I called first both times the break ended.

1 1/2 years

I've known him for 8 years; we've been seeing each other almost 7 years

I posted here it was a bit over three years. My, how time has flown. This week marks the end of a six year relationship. It is particularly bittersweet, as I still love him greatly, but have decided it's time to "get me back". Life goes on...

I've known him since forever, it seems. I've been dealing w/him professionally for about 15 years. At first, we were simply friendly professionals, as he was married & at the time I had rules--other women's men were off limits. We would talk for hours about nothing, but maintained distance. (Now he tells me he was attracted to me even then.)

When his 1st marriage broke up (5 years ago), he was falling apart & I felt badly for him. He was a nice guy getting screwed by a bitch (& her entire extended family). He had lost his home, his child, his money. During this time we became physically involved.

But, he decided that because of the differences between us (social? psychological? intellectual?--he never elaborated) it wouldn't work w/ us. I didn't want to be seen as "chasing" after him--especially when he'd indicated no interest in a relationship outside the physical.

I didn't want to be just a "booty call" or object so I walked away. Somewhere in that time he got married. But, he didn't tell me. I had to reconnect w/him on a professional basis & we picked up where we had left off. By this time, I decided that I was content w/the physical relationship as it was.

A mutual friend revealed his marriage & I tried to break it off after that. But, he keeps calling. Sometimes it's just to talk, sometimes it is a "booty call." Sometimes I take his call, sometimes I don't.

I've known bub's since i was 15 and i am now 30. He is 47. 15 wonderful, fulfilling, sometimes lonely years.

Nearly ten months. Over for seven after two horrible D Days but who knows what the future will bring? We aren't really done.

Previous relationship 3 years. Present relationship with MM 4 months. But feels like forever.

Ten years, he left his wife almost five years ago, and we've been married a little over two.

I've been with MM for 6 consecutive years............and we're still kicking it!

1 year of total bliss and 1.5 years of friendship contact.

Off and on for about 5 years.

if you ask me it was on for two and a half years and off and on another three years.mm says it was for two years only,just another reason to despise him.

I have known mm since 1999 when he interviewed me for a job. We did not have an intimate experience though until 2003.

It has been just over 1 year. Right now - we have no plans to stop. We did go through a no contact period last October for a couple of weeks - but other than that - We still enjoy being with each other when we can - which isn't often enough. But we will take what we can and make the best of it.

We were together for 16 months. We spent more time together than he spent with his partner. I thought we had it made but he decided to stay where he was.

IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG IT IS ALREADY SEVEN YEARS. I DO CARE FOR HIM AND I KNOW HE CARES FOR ME. MAYBE IN ANOTHER LIFE TIME BUT NOT THIS ONE.

1 year, 4 mos. And as far as we're concerned, we'll be together a lifetime. :D

Very happy OW

4 months. Until then he was going to leave. When he decidied he needed to try to fix his marriage I ended it immediately. I didn't want to be part of an ongoing affair.

Friendship began April 2005
EA began March 2006
PA began March 2007

We just met December 5 2006. Started the emotional affair right away. Didn't start the physical for a month.

I'll call it three months the 3rd of April.

three very strange months I'm not sure I'm better off wiht or without....

The EA I would say started in January 2002. PA started in May 2007. So 5 Years. Wish I was one would felt great about it, It just saddens me because I love him so much and he talks so much about moving on and I guess he never will move out. Told myself I would never go past 5 years. I hope I can keep my promise.

Going on 4 years in July...The only regret I have is that I am not married to him...

I've known my MM for 4 years now, worked for him for almost 1 year, and dated him for almost 8 months.

I was the 'Other woman' for nearly 6 years. Now I am the 'only woman'. We were in love & deeply happy together when I was his Mistress, we are in love and deeply happy together now we are married. I always knew we would be 'together' in the traditional sense at some point, despite the trite & overly simplistic maxims that were trotted out to me by others, and you know why? because the MOMENT we met, we both knew we had found 'the one'. It was complicated. There was a desperately controlling wife (ex now obviously!), and two precious children to defend. The children are happy, well balanced and loving toward me, I consider them a great gift, and I am glad that we waited until the time was right (or rather as 'right' as it could ever be) for them. There were times when I was lonely, missed him unbearably, and if I am honest...jealous, even though I knew there was no love between them but I am SO glad I waited, and those years simply validated our love for each other & strengthened our committment.
Real love, great friendship, a shared value system, physical desire and emotional compatibility are the true ties, not pieces of paper.

six months to the day

He dumped me six months to the day our affair started.

We just passed the 10 year mark. Never in a million years would I have imagined we'd still be together after all this time. I remember at the four year mark I said to myself, "You absolutely cannot be one of those women who's in an affair for five freaking years!" LOL Yeah, things change.

And thank God they do! Because if this relationship was the same now as it was 10 years ago, in terms of pain and intensity, I think I'd be institutionalized by now!

Now, it's just a nice, mellow relationship. We see each other when we can, sometimes we have sex, sometimes we don't. The sex is still awesome but sometimes it's just as much fun to sit and talk. We know each other well, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and we accept each other for what we are.

He's no longer my life. My life is incredibly full and busy and wonderful without him. Now he's just like the wonderful hot fudge sunday with sprinkles that I indulge in every once in a while. It's not a necessity but it sure is GOOD!

It's nice.

1 1/2 years.

we've been together for 7yrs. I went abroad for 2yrs but maintained relationship.

I have been with my MM for three years and 7 months exactly tomorrow, May 21, 2007. I wouldn't change them for the world.

Seems like we've been together forever. Actually, it's been about 10 years. Got together after his 1st divorce. But he wanted more kids & I didn't. A deal breaker, so he found himself a breeder. (Actually, she found him & got pg right away.) Their 5 year old is the sweetest little girl.
We started up again soon after she was born. The W wasn't interested in sex or anything. I thought it was post-partum depression, maybe not. I don't think it lasts that long.

Almost 3 years when we actually met and started the emotional affair. As far as the physical, it was about 2.5.

Almost to the one year mark (though I've known him for 3 years), gets more amazing every day.

We've been together 8 years now, but have minimal contact due to location. We live 4 hours apart. We talk daily through emails, IM's. Talk via phone about once or twice a week. It's hard to deal with at times and I tend to wig out at times, but we get through it. I know he'll never leave his wife and don't expect him to, but I know he's not truely happy with her.

eight months so far, but possibly two months too far......

WE were together 2 and a half years.

I went NC for almost 3 months and have been in contact via email for the last month. He asked to see me again. I said no.

But I really wanted to....

We met mid-April this year, didn't talk for about a month over the summer, but have been going strong ever since.

I have been with MM for 14years 2 months.

I have been with MM for 14years 2 months.

Ours lasted for nearly 3 years

almost exactly to the day.

We met almost two years ago. We dated for eight months before we decided that he should do what he could to repair the marriage. We separated, but stayed in contact for nine months after that. We have been seeing each other again for five months.

I can't even believe it's been this long. Our relationship has endured many different life events & changes. He has always been very good to me.
I would be lost without him in my life & I worry about the future now that we are getting older. He will never leave his marriage. I wish things were different, but I've had to come to terms with that a long time ago.

3 months.
We lived together for a month.
It was torture and I really don't think I'll ever get over him.



=/

2 years 2 months

We were in the affair - a physical affair - for 19 months. He called that off due to guilt and we moved into what he called friendship but what I called a low contact emotional affair. That lasted for another 6 months. I just recently ended that to give my self some space and time to get over him.

9 wonderful months of sharing, laughing, friendship and extreme intamacy. We just recently parted ways w/no contact due to Dday (that was horrible). While W doesn't know the complete story, she did find his text msg to me and his pics to me twice. I met him for lunch 2 weeks ago, as he was stuffing his face, he said some BS like "you know how I feel about you but this isn't right. We have to cool it" I looked at him and couldn't think of one word to say. I wanted to yell "well you weren't complaining about me not feeling right, when you were making love to me". In fact, if I ever said the "F" word he would correct me and say I'm making love to you. Well xmm and W went on a trip shortly after the pics to reconcile.

I know it was immoral to be with him in the first place but I didn't act alone. He pursued me like he was courting me. He would drive to places where he knew I would be (like the coffee shop) and leave "hello messages" for me with the clerk, he would bring me gifts to my work and email or call me at least 7 times a day. I do feel like the biggest sucker for buying into his bullshit and his own self-esteem issues. I remember one particular discussion with him when he admitted to being selfish. I should have seen all the bright red glarring flags. Starting from the first one, he is MARRIED but I didn't. He also confided in me about his wife complaining everytime he talked to another woman, she said he flirted. I just thought he was sociable. She didn't want him to drink an occassional beer, I just thought he had a few with the guys while watching a sports game - no big deal. He complained that she felt he acted like a kid and she WAS RIGHT ON. At one point I remember telling him to talk to her tell her the truth about his feelings and agreed that we should end our relationship because it was going to far and someone would get hurt. I considered myself to be a strong woman and he really caught me off guard. I hope to look back at this with an understanding that the experience was a "tough-lesson-learned". Nothing more.

I hate the fact that I spent 2 weeks going through emotional turmoil because of him, actual withdrawals with unstoppable crying, bodyaches and depression. Truthfully, I'm still going through some depression but I'm feeling better everyday. Soon I hope to look back and forget everything about him. There are days when I still love him and days when I hate his guts. Unfortunately, I still check my cell, email and voicemail in hopes of a message. Admittingly, I miss the GM messages he would leave on my voicemail. I remember the happy feeling in anticipation of listening to my voice messages each morning at work.

I called him early this week to check in on him and he was a completely different person to me. He was cold and aloof. I said "I'm just checking to see if you are OK" and he let out a sigh like I was bothering him. I said I know you are not suppose to talk to me but I wish you well and good luck with your situation, he said "you too" and that was it. I had to call just so that I could let go. I admit I have a difficult time of letting go. I was taken back by his coldness to me, he wasn't the same same loving and fun man on the phone. It was hard for me to believe that I had just spent 9 months with him, he was different and his voice sounded different too. He hurt me. He said he loved me and was in love with me. He said he was no longer in love with his wife and he wasn't sure he was in love with her when they got married. He said he didn't want to hurt her because she was a good girl who never had a home of her own and was always roaming. She had a tough childhood. He said he was no longer in love with her and that sex with her wasn't the same ever since they got married. He told me he couldn't even get it up with her and that he could get it up with me without taking Viagra. I hope he is wrecked for good for being such a liar. He can stay there with her and his limp D***. I won't miss being the only one that does most of the work. I don't mean to be so brass but this thought helps me cope with his insensitivity and cold he was the last time I spoke to him. I feel as though he has abadoned me without any regard to my feelings or situation.

I know there will be no future contact with him because I will no longer engage him. He is a liar to me and not the man I thought he was. I really put him on a pedastal and he didn't deserve to have all of me. Now he is lost to me. I admit I will miss his friendship but I know now that he wasn't a genuine friend to me and that he had ulterior motives. I feel sorry for his wife, I hope she will wake up one day and see him for the LIAR that he is. His friends told me they warn her not to marry him. They were right.

we have known eachother for 9 1/2 years we have been together for 5 1/2 years.

So far, 1 year

So far 15 months

We were together 3 years and 3 months. There was a 5-month break where I dumped him to get involved with a single man. Then I went back to MM. I ended it with him recently.

I have been with my MM 30 years this June.

it only lasted 2 months. loved every minute we spent together. still long for more.

It has been 7 rollar coaster years for me.

3 years in November.

1 year, 3 months. Just ended it last night again...hoping to have the strength to see it through this time.