Hi everyone,havnt posted in a while just thought id update you all on my progress or not..my husband has moved back in and has stopped contact or so he says with her..I do not trust him but he is showing true signs of remorse at the moment with the way he is opening up to me and expressing his regret.My only fear is will I be able to ever let go of this as some days I find it so easy and others I just cry all the time..I do love him so much but really cant see what it is I have to do to move on from this..Honesty I know is a good start and I do feel he is telling the truth but Im afraid of him being weak again I suppose.It has been a difficult 3 months since d day and we are both emotionally drained from it all and sometimes i cant even be bothered to talk anymore about it..but H has given me details of the affair as i wanted and I see him different now to the last couple of times i took him back...I think that starting the divorce proceedings may have given him the wake up call he needed...how can I rebuild a strong healthy marriage especially when everyone on both sides is telling us our relationship is doomed and will never work..yes he has hurt me beyond belief but my pain is greater when we are not together..Some advice on this whole thing would be great..I have stopped divorce proceedings obviously but really do want to move on so much..

Your relationship will have struggles, but it not doomed. What lies ahead depends greatly on the efforts you and your husband put forth toward becoming open and transparent to one an other. That can take a while to master, especially after falling into habits of secrecy, deflection, and avoidance, but it will strengthen your relationship.

I would investigate marital classes or seminars available to you that might help you in this process. There links to a few in our "Helpful Links" section.

TomJ