I just want you to know, along with all the others who are unfortunate enough to have to be on this site to begin with.
You and I have never met but we have something totally in common. Your insight as I go thru this has been so helpful. TomJ, Coral and all the others always know what to say. We are all in the same place but in differant places. You said my H was renigging, not re-negotiating. I had not thought of it that way and you saying that set off a whole new pattern of thought for me so that I could confront him. When I did I asked him to tell me the differance between the two words, once he did it was obvious to him he was taking the easy way out. He asked me to pray for him and said he was going to talk to his support people about it. It turned out well. I just want everyone to know that though we are all going thru this terrible thing. You are giving to others and thats makes some good come out of it. I appreciate every word. Thank you all so much,
Barbara

Barbara,

I am glad if something I said helped someone else.  When I read your post, I thought that your H sounded an awful lot like mine.  He was very controlling, and it was his way of the highway. He is also very good with words and manipulation. I am glad that you and your H both saw what he was doing and hopefully the two of you can work on that.  It isnt easy, that' for sure.

Yes, we are all in the same place, just different stages. I can honestly say, that unless you have experienced infidelity there is no way you would be able to understand what someone goes through.  You may think you have a clue, but you dont.  And just fidning others who have been there and who understood my pain and craziness made such a huge difference for me. This board, and the wonderful people here are my lifesavers

(((((hugs)))) and Take Care....Carol~