Hi just keeping everyone updated.We have separated again and I think this time its for good....we just keep fighting and fighting and its not good for us or the children...I think we are both going to have to face the fact that this has changed us as people and that we are not going to get past it...I am more prepared this time and not so emotional and feel that this separation is what we need as 3 weeks has been our longest time apart...I think we both need time to figure out who we are....and for now i am concentrating on me and being a good mum...he will still be part of the childrens lives but i dont want to fight him anymore or we will end up hating each other...there comes a point where enough is enough and i think ive come to it...thanks for listening.Mec.xxxxxxxxxxx

Mec,

Big hugs for you!

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

Some times separation is good, as it is hard to look at things when you are always fighting and in the middle of it all.  Figure out who you are now and what you want and then work towards that goal.  This can take some time. You may decide that you can work it out eventually.  And some times a couple cannot survive infidelity. In most mariages it is a deal breaker and taht's just it. Right now maybe the two of you need time and space to make a more informed decision not just based on your emotions at the moment.

Best wishes...Carol~

Mec,

I think what you and your H are doing is wise for you...

Working on yourself .and finding yourself, your self-esteem following a A is so important.

I am not a great Dr. Phil fan but I do recommend that you get the book Relationship Rescue...You will have to deal with your H for a long time because of your children...this book helped my H and I a lot..but it helps you to get a perspective of yourself..and how to relate to your S, be you married to him or separated.

(((((hugs))))

pat

"Time is precious, but truth is more precious than time."