It was three years ago today that my whole world turned upside down (discovery day).

Why did this have to happen? Why?

Also, I have started my medication for depression (cipralex/lexapro). My body feels like one big tight knot. Is this normal? It is day 6 of taking pills.

LonelyMomWife

LMW:

I am so sorry that this is your day where it began... be it 3 years ago, but regardless, it is still very painful. HUGS TO YOU!

Cant help you with the meds, but I did want to tell you that I was thinking of you and wishing you a peaceful day.

As far as the "why," I am still trying to figure that out.

Hugs,

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

just sending you lots of (((((hugs)))) to get thru the day...


As far as the meds... call your Dr. and ask if that is normal...the pharmacist where you go may also be able to tell you what the side effects may be.

Pat




"Time is precious, but truth is more precious than time."

Like the others I just want to send ((((((((((((hugs)))))))). D-Day anniversaries are the pits!

About the meds, talk to you Dr. I hope all is well.

~ CAL
"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection" ~ Buddha

We can suffer through our D Days together - I am two years on August 10 but today is the actual day of the week I found out. Up until today, I was thinking how well I was doing, that D Days no longer bothered me, that it was just another day.

Ha! Woke up today feeling angry and the images/tainted memories started to invade my brain - hasn't happened with such intensity in a while. Once again, everything took on a surreal quality - could all those things really have happened? H has changed so much that it is hard to believe that he did those things and that I put up with his bad behavior for so long.

A few things have helped:

-had lunch with one of the few friends who "knows" and we had a great time - she is compassionate and supportive. I showed her a picture of the OW that I pulled off the internet and she was shocked at how ordinary she appears, though we all know it is not about their looks. Still, she told me how there was no comparison in our physical attractiveness and whether it is true or not, it made me feel better.
-H sent me an e-mail acknowledging how badly he knows I must be feeling today and re-confirming his commitment to a wonderful future together
-I am going to get a pedicure on the way home from work.

I hate today too.

Thank you to everyone who offered comfort and words of advice.
I truly can't thank you enough.

I am happy to report I survived the day.

Susan, I am sorry for your pain. On the ohter hand, I am jealous that your husband wishes to make your marraige work. Your husband ackwoldges your pain and what he did was so very wrong. My husband has come to realize he is not a "family man".

Each day I wonder where that leaves me in terms of financially providing for my children.

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes become overwhelemed. I can't control this man.

I hope you too are o.k today Susan. WE DID NOT DESERVE THIS!

Thank you again for all of your kindess.

Please take care of yourselves and ahve a sunny (in your heart) day.

LonelyMomWife

Hi Lonely,
I am so sorry that you are suffering such pain. I hope that you got through the day somehow....for me, it took sleeping pills and self-control.

Yes, I know that I am lucky that H is so remorseful and changed....but still wonder if I will always live with doubt, insecurities, fear and mistrust. Maybe, the damage is just too severe to ever fully recover from.Sometimes, I think it would be better to have left and be free of the worry of wondering where he is all the time. But, he is truly doing what he can to help, though he will no longer dig around in the dirt of the details.

I don't really have any advice other than what you have heard here many times before - focus on yourself and remember that your love for you is the real source of self esteem and well-being. So hard, I know. You are a wonderful, loving, kind, compassionate woman and what you H did does not change that or reflect on you.

I still have to get through the real D Day, August 10, but we have dinner plans with friends so I am hoping that I am distracted.

Hope today is better for you.

LonelyMom,

I'm sorry you had to deal with such a day - it isn't fair that we deal with any of this. But the hand is dealt, and now we have to just get through it all - it sucks though!!!

Big sweet hugs to you!

Denise

"Our lives begin to end when we become silent about things"