H and I are on two different paths. He cannot understand my pain let alone help me through it. He seems to think that we should start as "friends" and go from there.
But let me ask you -- is that not an impossible task? To spend 13 years of your life being romantically involved with someone, get cheated on, abadonded...and then start over as...friends?
Live 50 minutes apart, see each other once or twice a week - chit chat over dinner. Pretend i have no emotions, no anger because God forbid I make H feel overwhelmed.
I need SO much more and H is standing by, watching me FALL APART, telling me that he can't be there to help me through it.
This crumbling soul is not me. If you knew me, you would know that I love to laugh more than anything else in the world. i have so much energy and spirit, i attract so many friends... I don't recognize myself anymore when I'm with my H.
Today is it. Today is my breaking point. I have told H, actually gave him a chance to be the man I need him to be -- if he doesn't come through for me today, I am filing for D. He says i'm being unreasonable and unfair. His choice. I'm done.
