It will be 2 years this July 28th. I remember telling myself that it would be over soon when I first found out and now I look and see that it was only the start. It doesn't hurt like it first did but it still hurts. When I have nothing to do and sit and think about what has happened these past 2 years, I see the worst and the best outcomes. There are a few things that I would have done differently, my anger could have been handled differently, but mostly I am proud of the way I have handled things. I will be the first to admit that I did some crazy things and said some crazy things but I think I had to do those so I wouldn't wonder.
In all this mess, I have found myself. In these past 2 years I have chosen a career that I love, I have gotten out of my comfort zone, I have become a better mom and a better wife. I have learned to love myself for who I am, the good and the bad. I am striving to be better every day and living the life that makes me happy.
I have learned that a marriage takes work. It is not just one sided for now I walk beside my husband. We make decisions together and talk about the future and what we would like to be doing in the coming years.
We both have changed. But in a good way. We have both started being who we really are instead of who we thought we had to be. No more pretending and that seems to be working really well. We love each other and support each other now. It is amazing where this journey has taken us. I know we have made it.

Just getting some thoughts out.

Laura

Hey, Laura! Good for you!! I know its been a wild ride, but I'm so happy that you see the positives and the future as expansive and open to both of you together. You may have to change your login name...

Blue Iris

"We cannot wait for the storm to pass; we must learn to walk in the rain."

That was a wonderful post Laura...you have come a long way

~ CAL
"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection" ~ Buddha

Laura,

Your post is sensible and inspiring. At only 5 months since D-day 3, I am sometimes impatient with myself and find I am still riding that damned roller coaster.

I often tap the heels of my ruby slippers three times and say, IT'S ONLY BEEN 5 MONTHS...IT'S ONLY BEEN 5 MONTHS, IT'S ONLY BEEN 5 MONTHS...





Peace is not just the absence of war; it's an exercise in compassion. -Dalai Lama
Coming to you from JJ